- Candida Crewe admits it’s frustrating not being introduced to other singles
- The writer says ‘single people hate that friends rarely set them up’
- Candida admits she understands set ups probably aren’t high on her friends lists
It’s a major moan among my single friends that married people mention a marvellous man who ‘has just come on the market’ and how they ‘absolutely must’ introduce you. Then don’t.
‘I will have a supper!’ your married friend says in September. ‘We can ask the Smiths and the Joneses and maybe Jack and Jill, so it doesn’t look too contrived.’
But somehow September comes and goes in all the business of settling the children into school, the husband into his new job, and the bloody builders in. By then it’s November, and Christmas is looming.
Candida Crewe admits it’s frustrating not being introduced to other singles (file image)
‘I feel so bad I haven’t organised it yet,’ the friend says, ‘How about January?’
In February, you mention it to her mildly because the chap you were getting on rather well with online has suddenly blanked you, like 43 others before him. She thanks you for the reminder: ‘I must! I must!’
But she never does. It’s not that she’s unkind, it is just that her life of family and work means introducing single girlfriends to rare gems is not high on her list.
Once in a blue moon, friends do set you up. A few years ago, Chloe organised a supper devised with the purpose of my meeting just-divorced Charlie.
She set a date for six weeks later. The day before, he emails her: he was looking forward to coming, but had met a beautiful young thing and was madly in love. Could he bring her?
Single people hate that friends rarely set them up. But maybe worse is when the exceptions like Chloe do — but don’t understand the urgency: with the gems, there is a window of about ten minutes. Six weeks ahead? Forget it. These knights are off the market again before you can say shining armour.