Mother reveals how tiny premature babies died after being born at 20 weeks

A heartbroken mother has shared pictures of her tiny premature babies, who died after being born at just 20 weeks.

Desiree Gehrke-Buhrow, 21, from Blair, Wisconsin, said ‘no words could describe’ her pain after her baby daughter Natalie was stillborn and her brother Mason passed away just hours later.

Natalie weighed just half a pound when she was born, and was 9.25in long, while Mason also weighed just half a pound, measuring 9.5in.

Desiree said she decided to share pictures of her babies on social media so that her family could see them, explaining how it has helped her ‘cope’ with her grief.

She explained that she and partner Tom Gehrke had found out earlier this year that their third triplet, Madeline, had died in the womb. 

Desiree Gehrke-Buhrow, 21, from Blair, Wisconsin, (pictured with her partner Tom and her two babies) has revealed how her tiny premature babies died after being born at just 20 weeks 

Describing her decision to share the pictures, Desiree said: ‘I loved my babies – including our other triplet, their sister Madeline, who died in the womb in February – and there are so many other people that cared for them. 

‘I wouldn’t have wanted them not being able to see their grand-babies, nieces, nephews, so I posted the pictures.

‘I wrote on Facebook I was going to do it, and said, “if you don’t want to see them, message me”, but everyone wants to. It’s closure for them.

‘I know that the pictures are a little much for some people, but I think they’re still very pretty. I don’t know what I would do without them, and the posts I write too, help me cope.’ 

The couple explained how baby daughter Natalie was stillborn, while her brother Mason passed away just hours after he was born 

The couple explained how baby daughter Natalie was stillborn, while her brother Mason passed away just hours after he was born 

Desiree said she and boyfriend Tom, 25, were overjoyed when they found out she was pregnant, and were given a September due date. 

‘It was our first pregnancy and I was one month pregnant,’ Desiree recalled. ‘We were excited.’

Shortly after, Desiree had stomach cramps, and wanting to rule out that they were a symptom of an ectopic pregnancy – when a fertilised eggs implants itself outside of the womb – doctors did an emergency scan.

Fortunately this was not the case, but the couple were told they were expecting triplets and that Desiree had a grapefruit-sized cyst growing on her left ovary.

She said: ‘It was scary being told we were having triplets. We had to think about three babies, not one, I’m only 21, not married, and there are no triplets in our families. It was a shock.

Desiree shared a number of heartbreaking images on social media of her and partner Tom with their two babies 

Desiree shared a number of heartbreaking images on social media of her and partner Tom with their two babies 

‘Then they said I had a cyst. It wasn’t cancerous but they had to remove it or I’d lose my babies.’

Desiree’s operation was scheduled for March and in the meantime doctors monitored her closely, doing a scan every two weeks.

In February, she and Tom were told the sad news that they had lost one of the  triplets.

Desiree said: ‘I had some spotting before but I thought there would have been more blood, losing a baby. We called her Madeline and it was hard to take in that she’d died.

‘It was sad to hear, but we were still grateful that the other two were still alive. However, I was nervous about the operation. I didn’t want to lose any more babies.’

Desiree found out she was expecting triplets, but doctors discovered one of them had died in the womb earlier this year 

Desiree found out she was expecting triplets, but doctors discovered one of them had died in the womb earlier this year 

The operation went well, but less than two months later Desiree noticed a wet patch on her bed.

She and Tom had dismissed it at first, until she had cramps later and suspected it had been amniotic fluid.

Desiree was taken to hospital, where a scan revealed one of the babies’ sacs had punctured and was leaking fluid.    

‘Doctors said this baby could make it, but they didn’t know,’ she said. ‘I was heartbroken. I cried so hard. I was in denial.’

The following afternoon, Natalie, whose amniotic sac had punctured, was delivered stillborn.

Desiree (left, with her best friend, who was also pregnant) had to have an operation during her pregnancy to remove a cyst on her ovary 

Desiree (left, with her best friend, who was also pregnant) had to have an operation during her pregnancy to remove a cyst on her ovary 

‘I started screaming as I just knew she hadn’t made it,’ Desiree recalled. ‘I felt her slip out and I knew, the doctor came in and confirmed her death.’

She didn’t have time to process this however, as minutes later Mason arrived,

Tom wasn’t present at the birth as he had started a new job that day and was an hour away. 

Desiree, along with Tom’s mother Tina and her sister Christine, made the decision not to tell him about Natalie at first, as she wanted him to drive safely.

Doctors told Desiree that Mason may not make it too, but fortunately Tom made it in time to see his son while he was still breathing. 

Desiree had hand and footprints of her babies taken to remember them by (above) 

Desiree had hand and footprints of her babies taken to remember them by (above) 

Desiree said: ‘He walked in then stormed out crying and punched a wall. He came back in to hold them, Mason first because he was the one still alive, then Natalie and held them and we cried.

‘When I held them I kept hoping it was a bad dream. I hoped I’d wake up and they’d still be in my belly. I wondered how this could happen.

‘I don’t know if there are words to describe the pain I felt when I held them.

‘Tom said he felt torn, like they had been ripped away for no reason. He was heartbroken, I’ve never seen such hurt in his eyes or voice.’

Sadly, Mason passed away just a few hours after he was born. 

Desiree described her pain after the deaths of her babies. Pictured is the coffin that Natalie and Mason were buried in 

Desiree described her pain after the deaths of her babies. Pictured is the coffin that Natalie and Mason were buried in 

A volunteer photographer later visited them in hospital to take pictures of Natalie and Mason, which Desiree has now posted on social media, to help her cope.

She said: ‘It has been really hard for Tom and I. I have to be strong and try not to show how hard it is. 

‘But we talk about how we are feeling and it has brought us closer. We get angry but it won’t change what happened.’ 

Desiree explained how she also had footprints of her babies taken, along with plaster casts. 

‘Posting about the babies helps me, looking at their photos and their footprints we had taken, and plaster casts that were made hours after they passed away,’ she explained. 

Desiree explained how she had plaster cast made showing her babies footprints after they passed away 

Desiree explained how she had plaster cast made showing her babies footprints after they passed away 

‘For ten days I carried around Natalie and Mason’s blankets, until Tina gave me a ring with our three babies’ names on, which helped me feel like they were still with me.’

Desiree, who has said doctors do not know why the triplets died, added that they would like to try again for children in the future, but want to give it some time.

‘I want to be pregnant again and some people cannot wait for that, but some say I should wait and grieve – partly so that I don’t have another preterm birth too,’ she said. 

Desiree explained how her best friend Maria has recently given birth, describing her joy for her.

She and Maria had taken pictures of their bumps at a gender reveal party thrown by her Desiree’s sister Christine.  

‘We had wanted it to be a surprise so the results of an ultrasound days earlier had been posted in an envelope that Christine kept hidden until the party. We were really excited,’ Desiree said.

She added:  ‘Whatever happens we will never forget Madeline, Natalie and Mason, and for now I’m happy seeing my best friend’s baby and sharing in her joy.’



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