A mother-of-one who has been financially dependent on her partner since quitting her job two years ago has hit out at critics – calling them ‘bitter’.
Gylisa Jayne, 26, from Cornwall, has been with Ryan, 27, a self-employed builder, for six years and they have a daughter Lily, three, together.
She worked at the Premier Inn as a housekeeper five days a week earning £10,000 a year, but left her job in September 2017 following her maternity leave.
Since then, Ryan has happily given her control over the household budget out of his £25,000 annual earnings. She ensures he runs his purchases past her before he spends money on himself, and vice versa.
While Ryan is happy with this arrangement, Gylisa admits she has received negative comments since revealing she is a ‘kept woman’.
‘When I get comments from strangers, it comes from a place of jealousy,’ she told FEMAIL. ‘What age are you meant to be a kept woman? Age is just a number. A lot of people will feel bitter towards it.’
Gylisa, 26, has been a ‘kept woman’ for two years – and relies solely on her partner Ryan’s financial income to support her and their daughter Lily, three
The mother-of-one, who worked four years as a housekeeper at the Premier Inn, said her priorities changed after giving birth to her daughter Lily, three (above). While they enjoy days out together, her partner of six years Ryan, goes out to work as a self-employed builder
Gylisa often takes her daughter on days out and admits that Ryan does get envious – but that’s he’s proud to be the breadwinner of the family after Gylisa quit her job two years ago
But Gylisa claims her partner Ryan likes being the breadwinner.
‘It’s the feeling that you’re providing for your family,’ she explained. ‘It’s a source of pride for him. He feels like he’s responsible for everything we have and we’re grateful for it. If you can earn enough to say you don’t have to work if you don’t want to, it makes you feel good.’
While Gylisa may not work, her friends all have 9am – 5pm jobs and find it bizarre that she has the time to call them throughout the day.
‘Some of my friends do comment about things,’ said Gylisa. ‘I had a friend who I went to call in the day and she replied, “I’m at my 9 till 5 job.” For some people, it’s less because I’m lazy and more that they wished they could do it.’
It was following her maternity leave with daughter Lily that Gylisa first decided her newborn was her new priority – not her job.
‘It was quite a low paid job anyway,’ explained the mother-of-one. ‘Ryan was a breadwinner even then – my wages were just pocket money.’
Ryan (above) earns £25, 000 per year as a self-employed builder. Gylisa says ‘while we aren’t rich by any stretch of the imagination, we live within our means’
While Gylisa returned to her job as a housekeeper for two months following her maternity leave, she claimed it made her ‘miserable.’ She recalled how Ryan (above) told her: “Look if you don’t want to work then you don’t have to,” so she decided to leave
‘Then when I got pregnant I went on maternity leave and took the full year. As the year came to an end we were thinking about what to do with childcare as we didn’t have any family down here.
‘I returned to work for two months but it made me miserable. He was earning to sustain us so Ryan just said, “look if you don’t want to work then you don’t have to” – so I jacked it in before Christmas 2017.
‘Your job gives you a bit of purpose but once I had Lily, I thought, “I don’t want to be wasting me day in work when I could be watching her grow up”.’
But Gylisa, who goes by @rocknrollmother_ on Instagram, has received backlash following her lifestyle choice – despite the fact it’s fully supported by Ryan.
‘The minute maternity leave ends there’s this massive pressure to work,’ she explained. ‘I feel people look down on me for not working – almost as if i’m lazy. I see it very different.’
Posing at a wedding, Gylisa says when she’s not looking after Lily, she is pursuing her hobby in writing – which she isn’t paid for
Lily, three, loves nothing more than making ‘wonky’ cupcakes with her mother at home – when she’s not spending two days a week at pre-school
She added: ‘I’m very privileged to be able to stay at home and I enjoy homemaking. I was a housekeeper so I like making my own house really nice.’
And as the mother-of-one sees her relationship with Ryan as equal, she ensures he runs his purchases past her – just like she does him.
‘We see it as our money so we both run decisions past each other,’ she explained. ‘Last year Ryan bought a motorbike but beforehand he asked, “Is that alright?” Obviously I said yes. It’s OUR money – we both put the hours in.’
But Gylisa, who has full control over the house’s finances, has recently decided to put a halt to their spending.
Above, Gylisa and her daughter Lily have ice creams in Looe. While she admits partner Ryan is sometimes envious of the time they spend together while he’s at work, Gylisa said: ‘But we feel equal in our roles in that we’re both working towards one household’
The mother and daughter spend a day out at Heligan Gardens, which Gylisa says is their favourite place so they even have a membership
‘I pay all of the bills and know what’s coming in and going out,’ said Gylisa. ‘Last year we were going out a lot at the weekend so I said, “we’re not doing that this year.” I want to have money and to do something else with it.’
But not everybody Gylisa has encountered shares the same view as her – and to anyone who believes she’s too young to be a ‘kept woman’ she says:
‘Maybe they should look at their own relationships. I find it really strange people would have their own money in the relationship. Once you’re in a serious relationship, especially now we’re a family unit, yes he earns the money but it’s not really his – it’s ours.’
Day-to-day, Ryan will get up early while Lily goes to pre-school two days a week – leaving Gylisa with a chance to pursue her hobby of writing.
‘When Lily is at pre-school I do house admin and a lot of writing,’ said Gylisa. ‘If I wasn’t writing I would probably get a job to fill the gap, but writing is my hobby.’
On another fun day out, Gylisa took Lily to the fair. Speaking of other activities she does while Ryan is at work, the mother-of-one said: ‘I like to have the house all fresh and clean. Everyone always says how tidy it is. I’m quite houseproud’
‘Then I entertain Lily all day and do a lot of cleaning. I like to have the house all fresh and clean. Everyone always says how tidy it is. I’m quite houseproud.’
She added: ‘I never sit and think I’m really bored. We’re always doing things – especially if it’s sunny we’ll go out.’
But while Gylisa is spending her days visiting the local beach with her daughter, Ryan sometimes gets envious that he’s missing out.
‘It’s always harder when it’s cold winter mornings and he gets up before us,’ explained Gylisa. ‘But we feel equal in our roles in that we’re both working towards one household. He works and it benefits the financial side and I do everything in between.’
Gylisa admits that while she has discussed swapping roles and earning the money instead, she finds the idea quite petrifying.
Above, Gylisa snapped a photo of her daughter Lily when they took a stroll on Whitsand Bay one afternoon. Gylisa has been a ‘kept woman’ since quitting her job at Premier Inn
‘I had a look around but it’s quite daunting to look for a full-time role as I’ve been out of work for so long,’ she said. ‘If that’s what Ryan wanted and we could afford our lifestyle on my wage then I would do it in a heartbeat.’
But she has found there’s a massive stigma attached to her lifestyle choice – and says there’s far too much importance on being paid.
‘We’ve been to a lot of weddings lately and people will say, “what do you do?” There’s a stigma when I say I don’t do anything – anything that’s paid.’
She continued: ‘Some people will say that’s really lucky or lose interest, but quite a lot of people hold a lot of importance in being paid.’
‘A lot of people think if you don’t get paid you’re not successful. If i was working from home people would see it differently, but because I write and don’t get paid a monthly wage they see it as me wasting my time.’