An anorexia survivor has shared a before and after photo of herself, to prove that not everyone with an eating disorder looks ‘scary skinny.’
Carissa Seligman, of Washington, D.C., has been battling with her body image from a young age.
‘I had been a dancer since I was 3 years old and spent a lot of time comparing my body to the bodies around me in full length mirrors five days a week,’ she told People.
Anorexia survivor Carissa Seligman shared a before and after photo of herself, to prove that not everyone with an eating disorder looks ‘scary skinny’
‘The girl with the eating disorder isn’t always the one who looks ‘scary skinny’,’ she captioned the photo in Instagram
‘I remember watching girls and women be praised for losing weight or being small so I thought that meant skinny was better.’
By the time she hit her teens, she was suffering from full blown anorexia. Aged 17, she spent four months surviving solely on crackers and coffee. She began eating again eventually, but spent the next decade battling her eating disorder in the pursuit of skinniness.
‘I thought that thinner meant better,’ she said.
She said that for many years, everything in her life was centered around food.
‘If I was sad, I ate then beat myself up for it. If I was happy, I didn’t eat because I didn’t need satisfaction from food. But no matter where I was or what I was doing, how I felt directly related to food.’
Seligman, of Washington, D.C., has been battling with her body image from a young age
Seligman says she ‘became a slave to things like calories in vs. calories out’, saying it was ‘sad… and it was also very ineffective’
Seligman finally conquered her battle with anorexia last year and now focuses on working out, eating clean and staying healthy.
Now she’s shared a photo of herself from 12 years ago, when she was suffering from disordered eating, to challenge the perception that people with eating disorders all looked dangerously thin.
In the older photo, Seligman looks slim but not obviously anorexic as her weight fluctuated over the years.
Alongside it, Seligman shared a photo of her newly toned abs and arms, after she says she finally learned to love her body.
‘The girl with the eating disorder isn’t always the one who looks ‘scary skinny’,’ she captioned the photo in Instagram. ‘In fact, she may not even be the thinnest in the room. But what you see on the outside doesn’t always translate to what is going on inside.
She explained that while she had begun eating again in the photo on the left, ‘I was very much IN my eating disorder.’
Seligman finally conquered her battle with anorexia last year and now focuses on working out, eating clean and staying healthy
Seligman says things finally changed last year, when she gave up alcohol. She said that without that ‘band-aid’ she was ‘finally free to find things that brought me joy’ like moving and working out
‘I had gone through a 4ish month period of starving myself and surviving solely on caffeine and crackers. Then, I started eating again and could. not. stop. I felt awful. None of the things that spurred my starvation period had been solved, discovered, or discussed and I began to use food to fill a hole.
‘So not only was I unhappy without really knowing it, BUT I was gaining weight which at the time was my worst nightmare. And I was doing anything I could to lose it again.’
Seligman says things finally changed last year, when she gave up alcohol.
She said that without that ‘band-aid’ she was ‘finally free to find things that brought me joy.
‘I got back to moving, getting stronger, & feeling better. Food became an ally in my life. And now, here I am feeling and looking better than I ever have. AND I’M SO VERY GRATEFUL.’
She says she has ditched staring herself for good, and instead focuses on working out six times a week and keep her energy levels up.
And she has advice for anyone who is struggling with their body image.
‘Self love is WORK. I wish I could tell you otherwise, but I can’t. There’s no quick fix or simple solution. The inside has to be good before the outside will be anything you can love.’