Confirming your suspicions: How to tell if someone has a gambling problem

A gambling problem is often not the sort of thing someone wears on their sleeve for all to see – it is usually well hidden, denied and often causes worry and shame.

Often someone whose gambling has become out of control will not face up to their own issue until it is deeply entrenched and may have caused offshoot problems, such as financial troubles.

If you are beginning to become concerned about someone’s gambling there are signs you can look out for that may indicate a problem.

Signs of a gambling problem

Signs of a gambling problem may relate to changes in a person’s behaviour, mood, daily routine and activities as well as their finances.

When someone has an issue with gambling, they may:

  • dedicate a lot of time and energy to gambling and find it hard to stop
  • initially talk about gambling a lot and then perhaps become more secretive about it
  • be preoccupied with gambling
  • gamble until their money has run out or spend more than intended
  • often be short of money even if they earn well
  • often be in debt or seeking to raise extra cash by selling things, seeking to borrow or even stealing
  • be especially secretive about their finances
  • become withdrawn and stop prioritising things that used to be important to them
  • be moody, anxious or down
  • begin to fail to meet commitments, fail to turn up to things or arrive late
  • start taking days off work and be secretive about them
  • lie about or hide their gambling
  • start neglecting responsibilities such as looking after the house, self-care, work or even children.

Of course, some of these signs may indicate another issue outside of gambling. What’s important is that if you’re worried about someone, you try to let them know that you care, are concerned and want to help.

They may feel that their problems cannot be resolved, but addiction help is out there and people do recover and get their lives back on track.

What to do if you are worried someone has a gambling problem

The first thing to do if you feel someone has a gambling problem, may not be the easiest – try to empathise.

Someone who is struggling with addictive behaviour is often consumed by remorse and fear and they’ll be more open to support if they feel you are coming from a place of compassion and understanding. They may feel totally desperate.

Depending on your relationship to the person, you may feel some of these emotions too, along, perhaps with anger, blame, even betrayal. Speaking to someone yourself may help you deal with those emotions and to better support the recovery of the person with the issue.

There are gambling helplines you can call, in confidence, for advice and information.

What if you think you have a gambling problem?

There are a number of questions you may want to ask yourself if you are beginning to be concerned by your own gambling.

If you have bet more than you can afford to lose or have started gambling with higher stakes to gain the same sense of excitement, there may be cause for concern.

Having experience of having gambled to try to win back losses is another sign of a potential or burgeoning gambling problem.

If you are borrowing to gamble, if others have expressed concern about your gambling, if you have felt guilt about gambling or your gambling has led to financial difficulty, these are all signs of a potential problem.

It is quite natural to feel a sense of denial over having a gambling problem, but if you recognise these signs in yourself, you may need help to stop or better manage your behaviour.  Don’t suffer in silence, the support is out there and things can be turned around.