At this time of year, we often start to think about ‘detoxing’. While the body doesn’t really need a detox — organs such as the liver do this naturally, meaning there’s no need for faddy diets or ‘cleanses’ — I do think the New Year is the perfect time to look at the things that are causing you stress and anxiety.
So here’s a New Year’s resolution you may not have thought of, but that could really make a difference to your state of mind: declutter your email inbox.
Is your inbox groaning under the weight of unread messages? Do you forget to reply to important things because they get lost in the barrage? You’d be surprised by how often my patients give their emails as one of the main sources of stress in their lives. People feel ground down by their inbox and what feels like a never-ending to-do list.
The fact is you are probably using your email incorrectly. Nearly everyone does, which is why it’s such a source of stress.
It’s not uncommon for people to have thousands of emails sitting in their inboxes. One patient told me how periodically his email would stop working because his inbox had exceeded 20,000 messages. He travelled a lot for work and this would often happen when he was on the road, so he would phone his PA and ask her to delete the bottom 5,000 so he could start receiving them again.
This approach is a total mess. Emails, like any technology, are a tool that should make life easier, not harder.
I, too, used to feel utterly overwhelmed by my inbox. I felt a constant, low-level worry. Have I done everything? Is there something I’ve forgotten? I was always scrolling down it, re-reading old messages and panicking because I’d be reminded of things that had slipped my mind; or even just panicking in case I’d forgotten something (when I hadn’t).
Something needed to change, and so a few years ago I sat down and came up with a plan to get on top of my emails once and for all. I don’t think it’s an understatement to say that it changed my life.
I realised that, without any proper system in place to deal with emails, I was having to rely on my memory for the jobs I really needed to do — which is an entirely unrealistic expectation as your brain cannot possibly sort through all the information piled up in your inbox at a glance.
The biggest error most people make is to use their inboxes as a holding pen for everything, when it should really be exactly the same as an in-tray on your desk.
Imagine that, instead of emails, this was letters. On your desk, you have one solitary tray marked ‘in-tray’. Each morning you come to work and there are already a few dozen letters in there.
Then, throughout the day, people are constantly coming over and dropping more letters in your tray, burying the ones from earlier. Some of them are important, others are frivolous. Some are just junk mail.
Now imagine that each time you pick up a letter, open it and read it, you put it back down in the same pile. Quickly it’s covered by other letters, and before long you’ve forgotten about it.
This would be absolute chaos — and yet this is precisely what we are doing with our emails.
So this year, aim for zero emails in your inbox.
Treat your inbox exactly as you would an in-tray: it’s a place for new emails to sit before you’ve read them. It is not where they are stored. Instead, they should all either be filed away or deleted. The delete button is going to become your new best friend.
To start with, you need to get on top of the emails you already have. Those emails already languishing in your inbox are what put off most people from ever tackling the problem. It seems just too huge a task, so we never bother. So here’s the solution. Delete them all except the last month. Yes, all of them. You’ll be amazed how you didn’t really need them. (And most accounts keep deleted emails for a few weeks, so you have a grace period if you suddenly remember something urgent.)
Now go through the remaining month’s worth of emails, picking out any that contain information you need to keep. Be ruthless. The vast majority of emails you think you need, you actually don’t (see box below).
From now on, emails you receive that you definitely want to keep should be filed away. Others can be deleted as soon as you’ve read them. So set up folders on your email account. Create one for bills, for example, and sub-folders for each type of bill you receive. If you need someone’s contact details or the timing of an event from an email, then write the details on your calendar or in an address book — and delete the email.
People feel wary about deleting emails but keeping it will only clutter up your inbox — and by extension, your mind.
Do not fall into the trap of thinking that all emails need to be dealt with immediately. In all but absolute emergencies, only allow yourself to reply to emails twice a day — 10am and 4pm are good times. You’ll be amazed at how most issues get sorted out without you having to get involved.
Some of the emails you’ve filed away won’t need to be kept for ever. Set a reminder in your diary for every three months to go through your folders and delete any emails you now don’t need. It should only take a few minutes.
It’s incredibly satisfying when you do get your inbox down to zero. A thrill, even. You’ll find you have much more time to deal with emails that really do matter — not to mention the life outside your inbox. And by not having to rely on your memory so much, you you’ll feel calmer in a way you can’t quite put your finger on.
And if you do it and don’t like it, you can always just let your inbox fill up again. But I’ve talked many people through this process — and so far not a single one has resorted to their old, chaotic system.
How to detox your inbox
There are, broadly speaking, six types of email. Here’s how to deal with each type for a decluttered inbox — and a calmer mind.
1 The work email: These emails require some effort — they’re about something we need to do, so are important. Often you can’t reply fully to this sort of email until you’ve done the work. Store these in a folder, but the job they contain should be added to your to-do list. Don’t keep any more emails about this particular task unless they contain vital new information.
2 The information email: This kind of email doesn’t require any specific action but it does contain important information such as someone’s contact details or the time and place of an appointment. This info should be transferred to your diary or a contacts book. Then delete the email.
3 The friendly email: These are newsy, kindly emails, usually from friends or family we don’t see often. They require a thoughtful and time-consuming response. You can’t (and shouldn’t) brush off a 1,000-word email from your auntie detailing her latest holiday exploits with a one-line response. This is going to require effort. These are the emails that will frequently languish unanswered for months — even though they tend to come from the people we care about the most. File this away, put it on your to-do list — and set a deadline to reply by.
4 The chat email: These emails quickly clog up our inbox. They’re the ones from friends or colleagues that go back and forth during the day. ‘Are you going out tonight?’… ‘Did you see EastEnders yesterday?’ That sort of thing. Delete them as you reply to them. And remember, you don’t have to reply to all of them. Delete, delete, delete.
5 The CC’d email: People have an infuriating habit of copying the world and his wife into emails. It usually means they are seeking either to cover themselves or to get reassurance. Scan read them and delete them. Don’t feel you need to reply simply to show you’ve read it. You’ve got better things to do.
6 The junk email: In this category I include absolutely every email from a website trying to sell me something, even if I buy regularly from the website. Delete them all. Chances are you’ll never look at them again anyway. Unsubscribe from as many of these emails as you can. As they come in, spend a few seconds clicking on the link at the bottom of the email unsubscribing you from the list.
We spend our lives being bombarded with adverts for things we don’t need. Give yourself a break from this.