Like most reunions after ten years without seeing the old gang, the Gavin & Stacey Christmas Day special had seemed a nice idea but proved disappointing, slightly depressing, and different than expected. Somehow managing to be madder, messier, and duller but mainly just… awkward.
It was an hour in the company of people who hadn’t aged well – or at all in some cases. Characters we used to find so engaging and relevant but suddenly seemed jaded, crass, or phony, with no charm whatsoever. With every other conversation starting ‘remember when….’ and permanently, frantically, acting as if they were having FUN when their fixed grins and joyless eyes told us different.
This was not only James Corden either, just mostly. Of course we know he must be Very Busy – doing his U.S chat-show, his horrendous cameo in the horrific ‘Cats’, and those endless ads on Talksport.
Comeback: Like most reunions after ten years without seeing the old gang, the Gavin & Stacey Christmas Day special had seemed a nice idea but proved disappointing
Reunion: It was an hour in the company of people who hadn’t aged well – or at all in some cases. Characters we used to find so engaging and relevant but suddenly seemed jaded, crass, or phony
But seeing him going through the motions as Smithy was dismal. Treating the story as if it had progressed ten weeks not years, he was seemingly uninterested in the idea of developing the character one iota, depicting Smithy like an over-grown teenager who (to the rest of us) was actually an unbearable buffoon.
Corden and Matthew Horne (as Smithy’s best mate Gavin) just looked like ridiculous, slightly misogynistic, 41 year-old adolescents. He was ten years old but Gavin was even still wearing a Harrington.
No wonder Horne looked so uncomfortable to be playing Gavin again, back in the spotlight, giving a lifeless performance that made Gavin seem a total bore.
Stacey had hardly changed/developed either but Joanna Page at least managed to make her likeable.
BFFs: Corden and Matthew Horne (as Smithy’s best mate Gavin) just looked like ridiculous, slightly misogynistic, 41 year-old adolescents. He was ten years old but Gavin was even still wearing a Harrington
Perhaps the supporting characters were never as funny and authentic as I remember them. But now Pam, Pete, and Dawn seemed ridiculous while Rob Brydon’s Uncle Bryn not so much an interesting outsider or ‘lovable eccentric’ as disturbing.
A decade later, they were all just irritating.
The exception and the Christmas special’s one redeeming feature was Nessa.
Brilliantly played (and, you suspect, created) by Ruth Jones, Barry Island’s most buxom, drole, tattoo artist has always, easily, been Gavin & Stacey’s most appealing, well-drawn, complex, character. Inevitably she (and Ruth) provided all the best moments here.
Jones’ timing was masterful for example when Nessa confirmed she would be repeating her alternative to ‘Dry January’, namely ‘Januhairy.’
Hmm: Stacey had hardly changed/developed either but Joanna Page at least managed to make her likeable
‘In the name of feminism I don’t have a single hair on my body until the first of Feb,’ Nessa stated simply, adding: ‘last year by the 19th, I’d grown a full goatee.’
‘She looked like Craig David!’ chipped in Stacey keenly.
‘On paper, me and Smithy just don’t add up,’ Nessa conceded to Stacey, having revealed she and her ex had, inevitably, slept together. ‘But put us between the sheets and it’s electric. We’re like Hall and Oates, Morecombe and Wise, Mel and Sue…’
Boom, boom!
Mind you, Smithy didn’t actually remember their night of passion.
‘Which is a miracle,’ shrugged Nessa. ‘I was doing things I haven’t done since my time in the circus. Back bends, single leg cuts, up rises, the lot…’
The final scene – Nessa’s impromptu proposal – suggested there are plans to do another special.
Comeback: The show’s old favourites were reunited for the Christmas special which brought some startling revelations
Family: Gavin and Stacey now have three children, including Harry and Meghan
Shock revelation: ‘On paper, me and Smithy just don’t add up,’ Nessa conceded to Stacey, having revealed she and her ex had, inevitably, slept together’
Karaoke: The exception and the Christmas special’s one redeeming feature was Nessa
But this one (in the prime slot on Christmas Day between Call The Midwife and EastEnders) had already seen them blown the chance of taking Gavin & Stacey up a league – to become one of the greats, emulating the nation’s previous festive favourites like Only Fools And Horses and The Royle Family.
Even less feted sitcoms like One Foot In The Grave and Last Tango In Halifax had shown how it was done: by making the humour and drama more sophisticated, with more depth. Not regressing, as this special had, to the imbecilic, zany, days of the 70s and shows like Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em where nothing was remotely realistic or relevant.
The likes of Mum and Girls or Fleabag have proved to achieve greatness, modern comedies need to be serious. To do it well, anyway.
Gavin & Stacey didn’t even do it badly.
What? Smithy had a new girlfriend but enjoyed a tryst with his on-off flame Nessa
Only in the final minutes did they finally remember the show used to be like this, giving Nessa the only moving moment, with any real emotion, during the entire hour – to add to all those with any humour.
Personally, I think Ruth Jones is wasted on shows like this or Stella, even though she writes them herself.
The combination of her talents and the appeal/charisma of her character means she shouldn’t be doing, and we don’t need, another gimmick-ridden, Corden-tastic, Gavin & Stacey panto like this one.
Nessa’s own series would be much better. Lush.
Awkward: Gavin and Stacey struggled with the realities of raising children as they attempted to have some intimate time together, only to be interrupted by their kids
Song: Bryn sang the controversial lyric of the hit in its original version which appeared to shock Gavin as the rest of the group hit the dancefloor
Hmm: The sight of Corden joylessly dancing round the hallway singing Elton John’s festive classic, as if Smithy was a lovable lad and not some sad, overgrown adolescent was (as Smithy had described himself when he went clubbing the night before) ‘absolutely tragic’
10 terrible moments from the Christmas special that showed ‘Gavin & Stacey’ had run its course
1. ‘Smithster’ and ‘Gavalar’
We got an early indication of the dated, lazy, rubbish to come when Smithy turned up at Gavin’s front door, prompting James Corden and Matthew Horne to go through the motions, doing their familiar ‘zany’ greetings ‘Smithster!’ and ‘Gavalar!’ before amusing themselves (more than us) for a minute doing The Robot.
‘Please enter the establishment my fine friend!’ Gavin beckoned.
‘Are you asking me to step in?’ Smithy checked. ‘Are you asking me to (yes, you guessed it) step in to Christmas, step in to Christmas…’
The sight of Corden joylessly dancing round the hallway singing Elton John’s festive classic, as if Smithy was a lovable lad and not some sad, overgrown adolescent was (as Smithy had described himself when he went clubbing the night before) ‘absolutely tragic.’
2. Des Lynam, 10cc, and Zammo from Grange Hill
The quality of the references in the Xmas special was shockingly dated and unimaginative. Besides a token mention of ‘Breaking Bad’, Gavin tutting about having to use a zero for the letter ‘O’ in computer passwords was as contemporary as it got.
Cliffhanger: After Smithy’s new girlfriend Sonia made a hasty exit from Barry after being unimpressed with Gavin and Stacey’s family, Nessa told Smithy she is in love with hi
3. I’ve got to do it at some point! This way I haven’t got to fork out for two presents! The ring is the present!’
Smithy’s justification for buying his new girlfriend Sonia an engagement ring (on eBay) now – in December, even though he had only known her nine months – illustrated what an unlikable prat Corden’s character had become. Just mean (in both senses) and misogynistic. Judging by the look on Gavin’s face even his best mate thought so. The way Smithy spoke to Sonia (with a stupid voice and preposterous, phony, language) was also quite unnerving and unpleasant.
4. Towels as rough as Ryvita, insect spray, and a Bear Grylls survival kit
Pam’s xenophobic attitude towards staying in Barry Island was worthy of It Ain’t ‘Alf Hot Mum or Mind Your Language. Sonia joined in later when she arrived in Wales by laughing at the funny Welsh road signs.
5. ‘It’s Pete. He’s a junkie! He’s addicted to drugs!’
Dawn’s wailing reaction to finding a spliff in the glove compartment was more like the silly, zany, ‘humour’ of sitcoms in the 70s than vintage Gavin & Stacey. ‘Get away from me scag-head!’ she screamed hysterically when Pete explained the joint was just a Secret Santa gift from his work-mates
Oh dear: Despite Dawn’s archaic, alarmist, views on drugs she enthusiastically joined Mick, Pam, and Pete smoking the spliff and skanking cartoonishly round the living room
6. ‘I don’t like cricket, no. I love it…”
The sight (and sound) of Dawn making up with Pete by crooning Cyndi Lauper’s anthem Time After Time was deliberately excruciating but, crucially, and typically of this ‘special’, just not funny. There was worse to come though. Despite Dawn’s archaic, alarmist, views on drugs she enthusiastically joined Mick, Pam, and Pete smoking the spliff and skanking cartoonishly round the living room to that dubious classic of the genre, ‘Dreadlock Holiday.’
Not even a Bob Marley song, let alone any other reggae record released since 1978. Again, sub-‘Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em’ levels of trite.
7. ‘Sexy times, sexy times, sexy times…’
The only way Gavin & Stacey’s relationship had developed in the ten years was Gavin’s lack of libido/interest in Stacey, and her subsequent frustration. When she entered the bedroom looking hot (and feeling hot), insisting ‘come on! We’ve got fifteen minutes!’ and taking her knickers off, Gavin’s reaction was…odd.
‘Right, let’s do this!’ he shouted. He then started preparing himself by muttering the mantra: ‘sexy times, sexy times, sexy times…’
‘Don’t call it ‘sexy times’!’ Stacey chastised him. ‘It’s weird.’
It was too. A weird piece of characterization: weirdly off-putting
8. ‘Fairytale of New York’
When Nessa and Bryn stepped on stage at the pub to do their karaoke song ‘Fairytale of New York’ was a tellingly predictable, populist, choice. You wouldn’t catch Phoebe Waller-Bridge doing something as easy as that.
9. We’ve got all these memories, Gavin. But I just get scared we won’t make any new ones!’
Gavin and Stacey’s big romantic scene was the first of two blatant attempts to get the show its own legendary, soppy, ‘Love Actually’ moment.
‘You’re a dad. I’m a mum. We’re parents,’ Stacey summarized, pleading for Gavin to make an effort (sexually) – and occasionally look at her.
‘I don’t want us to stop being Stacey and Gavin!’ she continued. ‘I just want us to stay as us.’
And with that, of course he went back to being ‘the old Gavin’ and all their problems were (supposedly) resolved.
Which exemplified up how trite everything about Gavin & Stacey had become. That’s the couple and the whole show…
10. Nessa proposing to Smithy
After a predictably disastrous introduction to the others over Christmas dinner, Sonia hurriedly departed with absolutely nothing about their relationship any clearer or more plausible. So we were none-the-wiser about why he spoke to her as he did (as if she were a baby, a puppy, or a simpleton); how they’d ever got together; and, above all, what on earth she saw in him.
Inevitably, Nessa happened to be standing outside the pub, having a cigarette.
‘You know you’re alright as you are, don’t you Smithy?’ she said, referring to his Christmas present from Sonia: membership to the Fat Club at their local gym.
‘I know it’s been complicated – you and me,’ she continued, tearing up, and clearly making An Important Speech. ‘But I loves it. And if truth be told, I love you. I know it’s weird but I do. I loves you. With all my heart.’
And with that she went down on one knee and proposed, asking a second time, softly: ‘marry me.’
It wasn’t much of a cliffhanger. We all know what his answer will be.
Another reason why another ‘special’ episode like this would be pointless.
OMG: The final scene – Nessa’s impromptu proposal – suggested there are plans to do another special