A grieving father has spoken of his agony after graveyard bosses threw tributes for his stillborn daughter into a bin.
Lee James and his ten-year-old daughter went to the grave of Daisie-May – whose heartbeat stopped in 2014 when Mr James’s wife, Sarah, was seven months pregnant, and found bins full of tributes to her and other children.
The parents, who live in Sapcote, Leicestershire, with their six other children, had left flowers and coloured love-heart pebbles by Daisie-May’s grave, in Leicester’s Gilroes Cemetery, to make it more personal.
Lee James’s daughter, Daisie May, was stillborn in 2014 and buried in Leicester. Mr James and his ten-year-old daughter found tributes to Daisie-May and other children in bins at the cemetery
Mr James said: ‘To my horror the bins were full.
‘We couldn’t find our belongings and to make it worse people had put general rubbish on top.
‘We found teddies from other babies’ graves – it’s just awful.’
Mr James said the biggest impact has been on his wife who now doesn’t want to go back to the cemetery.
He said: ‘My 10-year-old who helped me look through the bins, loved her baby sister even though she never met her, but she shouldn’t have to do that.
‘No child should.
‘It’s had the biggest impact on my wife because she doesn’t want to go back there now.’
Mr James said: ‘To my horror the bins were full. We found teddies from other babies’ graves – it’s just awful’
Leicester City Council states in the application for a grave in this part of Gilroes Cemetery that no tributes other than flowers are to be left, but a few years ago the rule was relaxed.
Mr James said he was not told that a review into the relaxed rule was taking place and was not told he could remove his tributes before they were taken away.
He said: ‘A courtesy call would have been good but we didn’t know anything about it.’
The review ended with a decision to remove flowers and other tributes left by graves and the council said they would be stored in containers at the cemetery.
Mr James believes these containers were bins.
The council says it has a duty to maintain the upkeep of communal areas ‘to respect all of the families who use it’.
Mr and Mrs James, who live in Sapcote, Leicestershire, with their six other children, had left flowers and coloured love-heart pebbles by Daisie-May’s grave, in Leicester’s Gilroes Cemetery, to make it more personal
Daisie-May’s grave has been the same since the day she was buried and Mr James feels as though the sudden change has shown a deep disrespect for other grieving families who have children in the cemetery.
He said: ‘Someone in high authority has made this decision.
‘It’s very insensitive and they don’t realise what they have done.
‘In May it will be five years since we lost Daisie and her grave has been the same since the day she was buried.
‘For the last five years it has been somewhere we can go to be close to her so it just makes you so full of anger that this has been done.
‘The way the council has gone about it is just disgusting.
‘It makes it seem like the babies are unloved, but they belong to somebody.
‘They’re still little babies and it’s just total disregard.
He added: ‘I would really like to sit the person who made this decision down in front of me and explain to them what it has done to people.
‘I want them to realise the impact it has had.’
A Leicester City Council spokesperson said: ‘Items removed from the shared graves are placed together in case people want to collect them, but we must stress that these are often in poor condition, and it appears that other people have been adding discarded items from other areas of the cemetery.
‘We are sorry for any distress caused by this and we will look at ways that we can improve storage of these items, but we have to maintain the communal area to respect all of the families who use it.’
A Leicester City Council spokesperson said: ‘We appreciate that people want to leave mementos for their loved ones, but we have to consider the differing views of all bereaved families’
The spokesperson added: ‘In this section of the cemetery, which is set aside for hospital-arranged funerals, we try our best to keep the communal graves clean and tidy so that all the bereaved families who share the space can pay their respects.
‘Although we ask that people only leave unwrapped fresh flowers on these shared graves, we relaxed the rules some years ago so that people could also leave small teddy bears in the area, if they so wished.
‘Unfortunately, however, this isn’t working. Soft toys that aren’t designed to be left outdoors in all weathers rapidly deteriorate and quickly become unsightly.
‘We appreciate that people want to leave mementos for their loved ones, but we have to consider the differing views of all bereaved families.’