HARRY COLE: What happens if Boris Johnson loses his seat?: The secret plan to counter the scenario

It would be the ultimate nightmare before Christmas for Boris Johnson – to win the Election but lose his Uxbridge constituency. 

So it comes as no surprise to hear that secret plans are in place to counter this potentially career-ending scenario.

The Prime Minister’s majority slumped to 5,000 in 2017 and the West London seat is now being heavily bombarded by marauding Labour and Momentum activists, praying for the ultimate political decapitation.

First Secretary of State Dominic Raab would represent Mr Johnson and No 10 in the Commons. Whips believe they could have the whole sordid process wrapped up by early January at the latest – however embarrassing it may look

Citing the precedent of Alec Douglas-Home, who was Prime Minister without being in the Commons for 20 days in 1963 after renouncing his earldom, No 10 insiders say Johnson would ‘tough it out’ while a new seat was found for him.

I understand the plan would see a Conservative MP with a big majority near London asked to step up to the Lords on a promise of high office, with a by-election being triggered within days of the December 12 vote.

Meanwhile First Secretary of State Dominic Raab would represent Mr Johnson and No 10 in the Commons. 

Whips believe they could have the whole sordid process wrapped up by early January at the latest – however embarrassing it may look.

Probably best to get canvassing instead, Boris.

Mogg’s still out in the cold

Jacob Rees-Mogg’s whereabouts – or lack thereof – is becoming a burning Election issue after the honourable member for the 18th Century was banished to Somerset over his radio gaffe about the Grenfell fire. 

But I can reveal the lesser spotted Moggster is revelling in his exile, sinking three pints on Thursday night to cries of ‘Moggy Moggy Moggy’ on a pub crawl with Bristol University students. 

Displaying his famous manners, the Cabinet Minister, pictured, even held up a brolly for smokers outside the West Country boozer. 

The lesser spotted Moggster is revelling in his exile, sinking three pints on Thursday night to cries of ‘Moggy Moggy Moggy’ on a pub crawl with Bristol University students

The lesser spotted Moggster is revelling in his exile, sinking three pints on Thursday night to cries of ‘Moggy Moggy Moggy’ on a pub crawl with Bristol University students

Labour are kitting out canvassers in Scotland in waterproof red jackets to fight the winter Election. 

Unfortunately, the garish uniforms are identical to those worn by the People’s Postcode Lottery workers when they knock on winners’ doors to give them the good news – and it’s not going down well. 

One lady voter, opening her opaque glass front door to a canvasser in Edinburgh South, sighed: ‘Och – what a shame. I thought you’d come to tell me I’d won £30,000.’ 

Cabinet rising star Rishi Sunak has barely been off the TV – and not just in the UK. 

The Treasury Minister was an answer to a 12 million rupee question on India’s Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? – which British MP is the son-in-law of billionaire Narayana Murthy? 

It stumped the contestant, who quit with only about £6,000. Mr Sunak’s fortune is considerably larger…

Cabinet Office civil servants are scratching their heads at what to do with 540 ‘Get Ready for Brexit on 31 October’ mugs they ordered before the last extension. 

After signing off a £1,984 invoice, officials have ‘quietly put them in a cupboard’. 

I suspect they’re destined to become Whitehall folklore – ‘Get Britain Ready for the Euro’ mugs from the 1990s are like gold dust in the Treasury. 

Labour’s red faces on Scottish boast

Labour are at pains to distance themselves from Nicola Sturgeon and the Scottish Nationalists, knowing the break-up of the UK is a vote loser south of the border.

So I wonder how embattled Labour MPs will react to the news that Jeremy Corbyn’s gatekeeper-turned-Election-planner, Karie Murphy, boasted that she would vote for Scottish independence in 2014. 

In a now deleted Facebook rant from that year, she wrote: ‘We aren’t voting for nationalism but independence from Tory rule and class betrayal by existing political parties.’

When I asked Corbyn’s team to deny Murphy was a secret indy-fan, they said she wanted ‘a transformational socialist government for the whole UK.’

I wonder how embattled Labour MPs will react to the news that Jeremy Corbyn’s gatekeeper-turned-Election-planner, Karie Murphy, boasted that she would vote for Scottish independence in 2014

I wonder how embattled Labour MPs will react to the news that Jeremy Corbyn’s gatekeeper-turned-Election-planner, Karie Murphy, boasted that she would vote for Scottish independence in 2014

As a former Prime Minister, Theresa May is afforded a security detail and a car from the Government’s fleet. 

Her armoured BMW 7 series is a downgrade from the PM’s custom-built three-ton supercharged V8 Jaguar, but I suspect that she will be more miffed at the previous owner. 

The nifty black motor was last seen in public whizzing a former Foreign Secretary around – one Boris Johnson. 

I’m sure that Mrs May – who is famed for her sense of humour – appreciates the irony of the swap. 

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