How to dress like a grown up with Shane Watson: Beware the big pants bikini!

Big bikini bottoms (aka high-waisted bikini briefs) are inching up the charts. They’ve been a fallback option for several summers, but now all the signs suggest that women are taking them seriously.

Clue one: while on holiday in the South of France, Sienna Miller was spotted wearing a zig-zag-patterned two-piece, with waist- high bottoms.

Clue two: at least a couple of the Love Island contestants favour the big pants bikini, and this is on a show where the sole purpose is to look as fit as you can, and attract as many men as possible. (We can safely assume that these women wouldn’t be letting the production team coax them into a high-waisted bikini just for the sake of visual variety).

Sienna Miller was spotted wearing this zig-zag-patterned two-piece, with waist- high bottoms while on holiday in the South of France

So here we go. This should be a breakthrough moment for those of us who would like to wear a bikini, but are way past our bikini-wearing prime.

At last we can wear bikini pants that are a tummy cover-up and a bottom container and be bang on trend so no one’s going to be looking at us and thinking ‘granny pants’. Great news, no?

Er, no. I’m sorry to say that the big bikini is one of those items you only look good in if you are slim, ideally tall, and have abs as flat as an ironing board. Like high-waisted jeans, high-waisted bikini briefs have a way of exaggerating your hips and lengthening your bottom.

In a way this is part of their current appeal: if you can wear the BB Bikini you are a cut above the itsy bitsy bikini wearer. Only the properly fit and fashion-conscious need apply.

On paper they may look like the answer to every woman’s dreams, but in practice they’ll add inches, and years, and make you feel like you’re wandering around in a girdle.

If you’re by any chance thinking ‘But I could get some that hold me in, like Spanx’ — which actually has some in tempting turquoise (£27, lyst.com) — forget it. What happens in those crucial spare bare inches between waist and bikini top? The fat has to go somewhere!

Still, when the new fashion rule for bikini bottoms is ‘the higher the better’, it’s definitely good news for the midlife bikini wearer.

Now slightly bigger pants — with sides somewhere between four and six inches deep — are no longer the mumsy option they once were.

Eyes adjust, tastes have shifted, and the small bikini already looks oddly skimpy and slight. Those are fine if you’re 16 and noodle-skinny, but not if you’re the mother of teenagers.

A one-piece or a substantial, sculpted bikini has so much more sophistication and glamour — not to mention all the practical benefits. That’s what we’re banking on. It’s the difference between cut-off denim hot pants and a chic pair of black shorts.

What are the rules for wearing big bikinis? 

Your bikini bottoms should never cover your tummy button. A minimum two fingers width below is the rule.

Graphic prints, stripes and block colours work best. The idea is to keep it simple and elegant.

The wrap-over bottom is a good compromise, if you’re in doubt. You can easily adjust the waistline to suit your shape and roll it down for sunbathing.

For balance, your bikini top should be a bit more covered: bandeau style, a mini tank, or a halterneck with broad straps.

Of course, there’s a fine line between elegantly well-covered and matronly.

The high-line bikini bottom that works best finishes below the belly button — roughly a third of the distance between your belly button and the bottom of your bra top.

The old-style ‘classic’ (deeper) bikini brief works well, too. And for balance, tops should be more substantial to match: bandeau style and not too flimsy.

John Lewis does a version of Sienna’s bikini in wavy ikat, with classic bikini briefs (briefs, now £10, and top, now £14.50, johnlewis.com).

Slightly higher-waisted is the red Whistles Cali frill pant, which has a matching top (now £25 each, whistles.com).

Boden do a wonderful selection of mix-and-match bras and bikini shorts (read: boy pants. Another rather forgiving option. From £15, boden.com).

But whatever you do, don’t attempt actual shorts — they make even the highest of high pants look easy.

Designed by model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Rosie for Autograph has a black-and-white striped bandeau bikini top and high-waisted bottoms (top, £25, and briefs, £16, marksandspencer.com).

H&M’s lilac bikini bottoms (£17.99, hm.com) are a slinkier, more bodycon alternative.

Generally, block colours and geometric patterns work best and are more slimming; busy florals and flashy prints can be less flattering.

There is one other option which gives you a bit of flexibility: the roll-down bikini bottom. You can wear it all the way up, slightly folded over, or turned down on the hips for sunbathing.

Pain De Sucre have high-waisted fold-over Tobago bikini bottoms in all the colours under the sun, and a few pretty prints, too. You can mix-and-match with the bandeau bra tops (briefs from £60, and tops from £75, paindesucre.com). They’re not cheap, but they fit well and last for ever.

When it comes to bikinis, don’t you just love being in control?



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