How upbeat TV star Shelly Horton mistakenly blamed her crippling depression on the pandemic

When Shelley Horton’s usual cheerful demeanour and bubbly personality were replaced with endless tears and ugly mood swings last year she ‘blamed it on 2020’

When Shelly Horton’s usual cheerful demeanour and bubbly personality were replaced with endless tears and ugly mood swings last year she ‘blamed it on 2020’.

The then 47-year-old media personality said she went from being happy and confident to feeling constantly overwhelmed and upset.

‘I was crying every day, which isn’t like me because I am not typically a crier,’ she told FEMAIL.

‘And they weren’t even little tears, they were big, fat roll-down-the-face tears filled with sorrow – there were days I was so sad I couldn’t get out of bed.’

However what the veteran journalist was feeling had nothing to do with the chaos caused by the global pandemic.

It was entirely hormonal and ‘very normal’. Shelly was experiencing the beginnings of perimenopause, the ‘seven-year period’ of hormonal disruptions before a woman’s period ends. 

‘I had never even heard of perimenopause, I thought menopause would happen in my 50s or 60s and would consist of hot flushes and the end of my period,’ she said. 

The then 47-year-old media personality said she went from being happy and confident to feeling constantly overwhelmed and upset

The then 47-year-old media personality said she went from being happy and confident to feeling constantly overwhelmed and upset

While Shelly was 47 when she was ‘side-swiped’ by symptoms of perimenopause, it typically begins from the age of 45.

‘My chest was so tight with anxiety I couldn’t breathe at night, but I thought it was because of lockdown and I had just moved interstate so was under a lot of stress,’ she said.

It wasn’t until her IUD, a contraceptive she had relied on to pause her periods for 15 years and often joked she ‘would marry’, seemingly failed that she saw a doctor.

‘All of a sudden my period came back – but I put that down to stress too. Then it came again and I bled for 32 days straight,’ she said.

‘I was completely drained from that, I just felt miserable and fatigued so went to the doctor to get it checked out.’

Shelly was terrified that all of her symptoms pointed to cancer but after a thorough medical examination doctors revealed she was perimenopausal. 

The chatty TV star found other women to be tight-lipped about their experience with menopause and said even her mother had little to say on the matter. 

Shelly found people to be tight-lipped about their experience with menopause and said even her own mother had little to say on the matter

Shelly found people to be tight-lipped about their experience with menopause and said even her own mother had little to say on the matter

‘I felt so much shame and stigma when I found out, so I didn’t talk about it either,’ she said.

But after becoming more informed, Shelly realised if other women weren’t going to start the conversation she would have to.

‘If the women in my life had spoken to me about it I might have been more prepared, I just feel so informed now,’ she said.

‘I spoke to my mother and she was a bit like, ”chin up, soldier on, we all go through it”,’ she said.

‘I just don’t think we need to be like that anymore.’ 

What is perimenopause? 

Perimenopause is the lead-up to a woman’s final menstrual period, the menopause. Perimenopause can cause symptoms similar to, or even more intense, than those of menopause.

Perimenopause usually happens in a woman’s 40s and on average lasts 4-6 years, but can be as short as one year, or as long as 10. When you have had no period, spotting or staining for 12 months, you have reached menopause and are then considered postmenopausal.

Source: JeanHailes Women’s Health

WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS 

Sleeplessness: Fluctuating hormones leading to night sweats are a recipe for sleep disturbance. You might manage to get back to sleep quickly after night sweats, but the quality of your sleep can still be affected by these interruptions. The result? Daytime fatigue.

Joint pain: Aches and pains in your joints, such as your knees and shoulders, are something you might simply expect to increase as you get older. However, these don’t happen without a reason, and menopause can be the reason.

Urinary health issues: Urinary tract issues such as recurrent cystitis and a need to urinate frequently can begin around the time of menopause. To prevent cystitis from becoming a frequent bother, make sure you drink plenty of water, urinate when you feel the urge and after sex.

Dry genital tissue, and pain brought on by sex: Dryness of the vaginal/vulvar area around menopause are unpleasant, and can lead to discomfort during and after sex. So it’s best to take extra care of this sensitive tissue during menopause.

Low sexual desire and arousal issues: Low libido and trouble with arousal during menopause might not be easy to talk about, but that’s no reason to ignore these symptoms. You can tackle them gradually, by taking a gentle step-by-step approach to improving your enjoyment of sex. A good place to start is checking whether something other than menopause could be part of the problem.

Headaches: The issue of headaches is a very mixed bag at menopause – there’s even some good news for some women. It largely comes down to whether the hormone oestrogen is a headache trigger for you. This means that some women will get relief from headaches, while others will find that headaches become more of a problem. Then there’s migraines – a very particular type of severe headache. Some women who suffer migraines will find that these worsen as they approach menopause, but then subside after menopause.

Mood swings: Last but not least, unpredictable mood swings can be one of the frustrating realities of menopause. Feeling flustered, anxious, or angry can be severe and sudden at times.

Shelly wants women to know they should be watching out for symptoms of perimenopause in their 40s.

‘100  per cent of women go through this, we should be talking about it at school and in the workplace,’ she said.   

‘The older generation need to put their hands up and say ‘”hey, let me educate you about this”.’

Shelly said men also need to be educated about perimenopause.

When the vivacious redhead was struggling with intense mood swings her husband Darren Robinson ‘just wanted to help’. 

Shelly, who describes her partner as an ‘earth angel’, said following her diagnosis he was able to remind her that her mood swings were hormonal.

‘He would ask if I wanted a lie down, he was empathetic and compassionate,’ she said.

He too thought a woman’s period ‘just stopped’.

When the vivacious redhead was struggling with intense mood swings her husband Darren Robinson 'just wanted to help'

When the vivacious redhead was struggling with intense mood swings her husband Darren Robinson ‘just wanted to help’

Now Shelly tackles her symptoms head-on, using a combination of prescription medicine and practical measures including the use of a portable fan.

‘Before lockdown I was having lunch at China Doll, I was having hot flushes so asked the waiter to bring me a bucket of iced water and wrapped a cool napkin around my neck,’ she said.

‘I am not going to be ashamed.’

Shelly says the fact the perimenopause stage lasts five to seven years is ‘quite distressing in itself’.  

She recommends women speak with their medical professional about their symptoms so they can transition more smoothly.

Now Shelly tackles her symptoms head-on, using a combination of prescription medicine and practical measures including the use of a portable fan

Now Shelly tackles her symptoms head-on, using a combination of prescription medicine and practical measures including the use of a portable fan

Shelly is now on hormone replacement therapy and anti-depressants to help her, while her sister-in-law has chosen to use Flordis supplements for a more natural approach.

‘You just have to do what works for you,’ she said. 

Shelly has been receiving treatment for six months now.

‘I am 100 per cent back to my happy self,’ she said.

‘When I have down days I wonder if it is the peri-menopause but then I remind myself we are all allowed down days.’  

Shelly is working in collaboration with the Flordis Menopause Hub to help educate women about menopause including symptoms and treatment options. 

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