An elegance coach has revealed the body language moves that could be turning off your partner without you realising.
Anna Bey, who splits her time between London and Geneva, boasts over 1.2million subscribers on YouTube, where she shares self-help videos for infiltrating high society, having good etiquette in posh settings, and living a ‘feminine lifestyle’.
The elegance coach, who married her wealthy husband during lockdown, revealed in her latest clip the subtle things you might be doing without realising, like giggling too much.
She suggested that being ‘overly sexual’, embracing ‘masculine gestures’ or a ‘harsh tone’ could be turning your man off.
The elegance coach adds that you should never avoid eye contact as it appears cold and like you’re ‘afraid of flirting’.
Anna (pictured in a pose she claims is ‘overly sexual’) said: ‘[One] body language that will turn men off is when a woman is overly sexual. And this doesn’t matter if you’re doing it as a joke, or if you’re serious’
DON’T BE OVERLY SEXUAL
Anna said: ‘[One] body language that will turn men off is when a woman is overly sexual. And this doesn’t matter if you’re doing it as a joke, or if you’re serious.
‘You know, there are some body language cues that men tend to appreciate like when you bite your lip a little bit.’
But the elegance coach insisted that the exaggerated version looks ‘incredibly stupid’.
‘You don’t want to create an awkward atmosphere and men do get a little bit uncomfortable when something is awkward,’ she added.
‘When you’re trying to impress a man with your sensual side, do it in a very subtle way, where it doesn’t look like you’re putting on an act…
‘… When it actually looks like you’re genuinely just biting your lip without even noticing that you’re doing it and that usually becomes sexy to the man – not when it’s all choreographed and so much like a show.
‘What is attractive to the opposite sex is when you are yourself and when you’re doing things without really even noticing that you are doing them.
‘That is just part of who you are. That is the true nature of you. Not when you are just doing a bunch of theatrics.’
AVOID MASCULINE GESTURES
Anna suggests that being ‘overly sexual’, embracing ‘masculine gestures’ (pictured) or a ‘harsh tone’ could be turning your man off
Anna suggested avoiding masculine body language cues, such as hunching and sitting with your legs spread apart.
She even claimed that just holding open the door for your partner to pass or insisting on paying the bill could turn off ‘affluent’ men.
The controversial elegance coach also added: ‘Even things that I know not everybody’s going to think about, but as an example lifting heavy things, carrying heavy grocery bags, that is the man’s job, that is not for you to do as a woman, unless you don’t have a man by your side to help you.
‘If there is a man, he should always be carrying that stuff. I’m not saying now that men are going to be so incredibly put off as soon as they see you carrying heavy bags.
‘No, I’m talking about when we’re adding up all the small bits together. When we have overall very masculine behaviour, and those masculine cues put together, might not attract the man.’
DITCH HARSH, MASCULINE TONES
The coach said: ‘I really enjoy being a woman and I really enjoy being a feminine woman and my husband appreciates me as a feminine woman as well.’
Anna explained: ‘[But] I have this harsh tone when I speak. I’m speaking really loud or too direct or some of the things that I say or even the vocabulary that I use, I think about that and I try to soften it.
‘I don’t try to change who I am. I just really try to reduce that a lot because what really happens is that we just let loose and we don’t even understand what is going on.
‘Not all men want to have a very feminine woman who speaks very soft spoken. Not all men appreciate a woman like that, some men like a bit more flamboyant women, other men like other types of women.’
The elegance coach adds that you should never avoid eye contact as it appears cold and like you’re ‘afraid of flirting’. Anna, pictured, also suggests you shouldn’t lean towards a man too much
STAY AWAY FROM DESPERATE SIGNALS
Anna recognises that there are cues you’re going to send to a man to tell him that you’re interested.
But, she said, you don’t want to make it in an obvious way or seem desperate, as no woman wants to look too available.
Anna says: ‘Be a woman, be feminine. Don’t be an infant. Don’t be his mother, either.
‘When you’re like ‘Little Miss Giggly’, being girly, like a 10-year-old, is not attractive.
‘And neither is turning into his mother telling him what to do and following up with ‘did you do this?’ ‘when are you coming home’.
She says: ‘Be a woman, be a feminine woman, a man loves that ladies.’
Anna advised using body language to show him that you’re interested by giving him some form of physical touch, but make sure it doesn’t come to often and not in the wrong places.
She said: ‘There’s another body language cue that says we should be leaning in a little bit to the man and again we don’t want to now be like leaning in so desperate that it screams I’m interested.
‘That is the worst energy you want to send off. You want to always keep him guessing. “Is she interested or is she not? I think she is but I’m not 100 per cent sure”.’
DON’T FORGET TO FLIRT
It is important, according to the controversial coach, that you’re not turning yourself into a ‘stone cold rock’.
She described it as when you are too afraid of flirting or even to look at him. If you don’t give him any eye contact she says, you seem absolutely not interested in him at all.
You need to give some form of validation even if it is a little laugh at one of his jokes, otherwise, according to Anna, he will lose confidence in such a woman.
She explained: ‘He starts thinking about you know what, “I don’t think she’s interested”. He might even start feeling bad about himself and then he just gets put off.’
Anna said that you can’t hide in a shell and so you need to find the perfect balance of showing interest without being too full on.