British soul singer Paul Young is brewing coffee in his Hertfordshire kitchen and speaking about his beloved wife Stacey, who died 14 months ago from brain cancer. ‘We’ve marked a year now it’s been, since she passed on,’ Young says quietly. ‘I think that’s quite an important landmark. We’re all in the right place now.’
Stacey’s death at the age of 52, in January 2018, was mourned by friends and family who offered support to Young and his children with hundreds of touching messages. Sir Rod Stewart sent his condolences, saying: ‘My heart goes out to you for your loss. Stacey was warm, wonderful and always got the joke.’
British soul singer Paul Young performing with Los Pacaminos in 2017
Even in the depths of grief, Young replied to Stewart with a gentle joke. ‘I said, “I can’t believe you told me to go for the brunette,” ’ Young laughs softly, alluding to Stewart’s legendary fondness for blondes. ‘He used to get on very well with her – she had a great sense of humour.’
Rod had been around when the couple first met in 1983. Stacey, who was a model, appeared in the video for Young’s second single Come Back And Stay. They married in 1987 and had three children together, daughters Levi and Layla and son Grady, now 32, 25 and 23 respectively.
The couple split, but didn’t divorce, in 2006 and during the period they were separated, Stacey had her fourth child Jude (now 12) with Israeli businessman Ilan Slazenger. They reconciled in 2013, with Paul becoming stepdad to Jude and lived as a ‘close, happy, blended family’.
They had been married 30 years when Stacey received her diagnosis. It coincided with Young turning 60, and began a time of terrible turmoil during which he immersed himself in work, encouraged by his wife.
‘Emotionally you’re all over the place,’ Young says, the familiar serrated voice cracking with emotion. ‘But I decided, “I have to go out on the road, I’ve got to earn money because I don’t know what I’m going to have to pay for, I don’t know what’s ahead of me.” ’
Music, specifically performing, was therapeutic in dealing with the anguish of his partner becoming increasingly ill.
‘It helped,’ he exhales. ‘It really helped.’
Young has continued to find solace in music following Stacey’s death. He plays live as a solo artist or with Los Pacaminos, the Tex-Mex band he also fronts, but even this became a struggle when he contracted pneumonia on the road last year. ‘I seemed a bit out of breath on the last European date,’ he recalls. ‘I just thought it was me being unfit but it got so bad that I needed to do something about it.
‘They say pneumonia goes after four months, although as you get older it takes a longer time to go. I’ve still got to rest a lot and I’m not meant to exert myself but I’ll make this tour by the skin of my teeth.’
His latest UK dates continue the 35th anniversary celebration of his debut solo album No Parlez, which featured the No 1 Wherever I Lay My Hat (That’s My Home), and the Eighties anthems Come Back And Stay and Love Of The Common People.
‘There was that “anything is achievable” attitude in the Eighties,’ Young reminisces. ‘Everything was very positive and gung-ho. Well, “hedonistic” is the word they use a lot. We were all confident bordering on arrogant.’
Paul Young with Stacey, 2004. They had been married 30 years when Stacey received her diagnosis of brain cancer
And with good reason. No Parlez sold more than a million copies in the UK, making Young a worldwide superstar by the age of 27. Now 63, he has found returning to his youth to perform the material ‘very strange but quite interesting’ although, as an older man, he now delivers the songs with a hard-won wisdom.
In the light of his loss, Everything Must Change and Every Time You Go Away take on a new depth and resonance. ‘Everything that happens in your life is a lesson learned,’ Young says. ‘You are what you decide you want to be. You can be some horrible, bitter person who’s not a pleasure to be with. That’s your choice. There are people who sit at home and decide to anonymously troll people on the internet – what is wrong with these people? Or you can be a positive person and put some good energy into this world.’
Young takes a break from reflection to address a long-standing rock mystery. Were the opening lines of Band Aid’s Do They Know It’s Christmas? written for David Bowie – a duty that, in the event of Bowie being unable to attend the recording, fell to Young?
‘That’s what I always thought,’ he puzzles. ‘But when I asked Bob [Geldof] about it he said no.
‘Then I toured with Midge Ure last year in America,’ Young says, referring to Geldof’s Band Aid co-founder. ‘So, I got to ask him how it happened. I said, “Look, people keep asking me about the Bowie thing.” Midge said, “We tried it out with three or four different people, but then we chose you.”’
Luton-born Young prides himself on never having been a diva. ‘I might have had a couple of little… moments,’ he winces. ‘But we always saw the funny side.’ The secret to his survival, he explains, was that he was rarely excessive. ‘That’s probably why I’ve never had to stop. Because I could keep it within the realms of normality.’
So, while many musicians of the Live Aid generation have quit the booze – Midge Ure, Paul Weller, Elvis Costello – Young hasn’t hung up his drinking spurs quite yet. ‘I haven’t stopped at all,’ he declares. ‘I don’t get drunk any more but drinking is still a part of my life. I’ve a big weakness for a good red wine. But half a bottle is fine,’ he insists. ‘Or maybe two-thirds!’
Paul Young’s nationwide ‘No Parlez’ tour begins next month. paul-young.com