The Middle East is teetering on the edge of full-scale regional war – thank god we’ve got Penny Wong to sort it all out!

The Foreign Minister decided the best use of her time was to ring up her Iranian counterpart to offer… well, it’s still not exactly clear what: Guidance? Condemnation? Sympathy?

Wong claims she was calling to encourage de-escalation: to ‘return to diplomacy and dialogue’. Iran, however, immediately issued a statement framing her comments to them as critical of Israel:

‘The Australian foreign minister voiced deep regret and serious concern over the escalation of tensions in the region’, the Iranian statement said. 

‘Wong stressed that such developments risk further regional destabilisation. She also urged all sides to refrain from actions that risk escalating tensions.’

Israel’s ambassador to Australia, Amir Maimon, then used social media to criticise calls for diplomacy: ‘Iran isn’t hiding its intent, it declares it. And it’s building the weapons to fulfil it. Through its pursuit of nuclear arms, Iran has turned this into an asymmetric conflict, between a democracy seeking to defend itself and a regime bent on destruction.’

While the Israeli ambassador didn’t name Wong specifically, his criticism was hardly veiled.

Wong’s call, regardless of her intentions, handed Tehran a propaganda coup and upset Israel. Iran spun her intervention in their favour – and why wouldn’t they?

Anthony Albanese's government was forced to defend a foreign policy shambles on Monday after Penny Wong called the Iranian foreign minister - leading Iran to boast about what she told them and sparking the ire of Israel

Anthony Albanese’s government was forced to defend a foreign policy shambles on Monday after Penny Wong called the Iranian foreign minister – leading Iran to boast about what she told them and sparking the ire of Israel 

Fire and smoke towers into the sky after an Israeli bombing raid on an oil depot near Tehran. The Iranian capital is some 11,000km away from Australia and hardly at the centre of our interests - but the Foreign Minister has somehow dragged the country into the dispute

Fire and smoke towers into the sky after an Israeli bombing raid on an oil depot near Tehran. The Iranian capital is some 11,000km away from Australia and hardly at the centre of our interests – but the Foreign Minister has somehow dragged the country into the dispute

When the foreign minister of a liberal democracy calls up the foreign minister of a brutal undemocratic regime and doesn’t condemn them outright, of course they take the win and run with it.

Wong says that certainly wasn’t her intention, pushback which has been echoed by Cabinet colleagues such as Amanda Rishworth who was forced to try and clean up Wong’s mess on morning television today.

Good intentions (if that’s what they really were) don’t matter here, outcomes do. And the outcome from Wong’s foolhardy intervention backfired.

Whatever she hoped to achieve, she ended up muddying Australia’s position, fuelling a narrative that plays straight into Iran’s hands. She also managed to alienate key allies in the process. For its part Israel is incensed by Wong’s actions.

This is not foreign policy, it’s diplomatic freelancing dressed up as relevance.

No one in Tehran is picking up the phone to Penny Wong and genuinely seeking the Australian foreign minister’s advice. 

So why would they care what she has to say when she proactively puts a call through? Just because Julie Bishop previously engaged with the Iranians in less hostile times doesn’t greenlight Wong’s intervention here.

There’s a broader problem here too. Australia can’t credibly claim to be a neutral broker in this conflict, and nor should it try to be one. 

Wong's move was a masterclass in the art of bumbling your way into the middle of a crisis you have no capacity to resolve. Above, Iranian Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei

Wong’s move was a masterclass in the art of bumbling your way into the middle of a crisis you have no capacity to resolve. Above, Iranian Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei

Labor’s recent criticisms of Israel followed up with a call to Tehran now look that little bit more anathema to our role as a defender of western liberal democracy.

We’re a middle power with strong ties to the West, that’s just a fact, and it includes strong historical ties to Israel. 

Labor has already pushed the boundaries in that respect with its criticisms of Israel in relation to Palestine.

Wong has managed to make Donald Trump appear positively competent by way of comparison. The cost of being taken advantage of like this is reputational.

So what happens now? There’s no obvious next step for Australia. We’re not a power broker in the Middle East, we never have been. 

We’re not on the UN Security Council either. We don’t even have much sway over the parties involved.

If the goal was to be seen doing something Wong has succeeded, just not in the way she had hoped. 

This was a masterclass in the art of bumbling your way into the middle of a crisis you have no capacity to resolve.

It’s the kind of misguided stunt that achieves precisely nothing, except perhaps to confirm that even when we don’t need to be involved, Wong can still find a way to get in over her head.

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