Are YOU being manipulated? Psychologist reveals the four signs someone is trying to control you
A psychologist has revealed four signs that someone may be manipulating you – including them attaching strings to kind acts they do for you.
Dr Julie Smith, a clinical psychologist with a private practice in Hampshire, has more than four million followers on TikTok.
She shares videos on mental health topics on the platform, where she has garnered some 52million likes.
Among the topics she has covered are how to feel more confident, how to recognise the signs that you’re heading towards burnout, and how to stop catastrophising.
In a recent clip, that garnered more than one million views, the psychologist discussed signs that you may be being manipulated, listing four behaviours to look out for.
Dr Julie Smith (pictured) is a clinical psychologist with a private practice in Hampshire. She has gained more than 4.2million followers on TikTok
Speaking in the video, Dr Smith says: ‘I’m a psychologist and here’s four signs you’re being manipulated.
‘Number one, they undermine relentlessly, or get you right where it hurts with a very personal attack.
‘[They] then follow up with something like, “I’m just saying, don’t overreact,”.’
She adds that they do this ‘not just once, but repeatedly over time’.
Tackling the second point, Dr Smith says: ‘Number two, they do things for you, maybe even things you didn’t even ask for, and then use that as currency to get you to do what they want you to do.
‘So every act of kindness seems to have strings attached.’
The third point was that ‘they might dismiss your problems and play up their own’.
She explained that this can be played by them saying things like: ‘Oh, you think you’ve got it bad? Try being me.’
Speaking in a recent video, clinical psychologist Dr Julie Smith (pictured) shared four signs someone may be manipulating you
Going on to her final point , Dr Smith said: ‘Number four [is] playing the victim role.
‘They refuse to take responsibility for themselves, and then ask you to do things for them that you wouldn’t normally say yes to, if you thought they could do it for themselves.’
Viewers took to the comments section of the video to discuss their thoughts on the clip, as well as their own experiences with feeling and being manipulated.
One revealed: ‘Thats why I’d like to be alone most of the time these days. I’m so fed up with them manipulating me.’
Another added: ‘Sounds like my life the last 26 years, free now but it’s hard.’
And a third wrote: ‘Yes, I’m currently experiencing this.’