Sister’s double heartache after both of her brothers took their own lives

A devastated sister has spoken of her heartbreak after both of her brothers tragically took their own lives within 10 months of one another.

Charlotte Rowe was left in disbelief when she received the news that her older sibling Matthew had been found dead at his university halls at the age of 20. 

Less than a year later her younger brother Tom took his own life at their family home in Newport, Wales. He was only 15. 

The 21-year-old student admitted dealing with the passing of Matthew was a ‘huge shock’ and her ‘first experience of death’. 

She told Wales Online: ‘I’d never lost anyone who was that close to me before, especially through suicide. I didn’t really know what suicide was to be honest.’ 

But her life changed forever when Tom, who had shown no signs of struggling with his brother’s death, took his own life in his bedroom.

Ms Rowe, who was studying sociology at Cardiff University at the time, said: ‘I was just grieving on my own and thought “I can’t deal with this again”. 

Charlotte Rowe was devastated when she received the news that her older sibling Matthew (pictured) was found dead at his university halls at the age of 20

Ms Rowe said both her brothers were ‘normal’ and didn’t show signs that they were struggling with mental health 

‘I thought that I needed to carry on and just keep going. Just block it out.’ 

After Tom’s inquest in 2018, Ms Rowe said both her brothers appeared ‘normal’ and didn’t show signs that they were struggling with mental health. 

Matthew was described as a ‘bright young man’ with excellent grades and had numerous offers to study medicine before he went to Manchester University in 2015.

The keen rugby and hockey player was sadly found dead in his bedroom by fellow undergraduate students at his halls of residence.

After his death, Tom, who was once a ‘mischievous and fun’ lad, become absorbed in video games which ‘consumed’ his life.

After Tom’s (pictured) inquest in 2018, Ms Rowe said both her brothers were ‘normal’ and didn’t show signs that they were struggling with mental health

One evening after a quarrel with his mother over a mobile phone, Tom (pictured) went to his room and took his own life

His parents didn’t notice any signs that he was struggling with the loss of his older brother just 10 months prior.

One evening after a quarrel with his mother over a mobile phone, Tom went to his room and took his own life.

The devastating news of a second death in the family forced Ms Rowe to finally seek help for her mental health. 

The 21-year-old was diagnosed with OCD and intrusive thoughts and was offered special therapy for PTSD.

The devastating news of a second death in the family forced Ms Rowe to finally seek help for her mental health

The therapy, called Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EDMR) helps to heal people after traumatic loss by mimicking REM (rapid eye movement) in sleep.

It’s a psychoactive therapy that uses the patient’s own rapid, rhythmic eye movements and can help with emotionally charged memories of traumatic events.

Ms Rowe says at first she thought it sounded ‘ridiculous’ but soon realised it started to help her.

And she soon realised the therapy not only helped her with the death of both her brothers but also other traumatic experiences in her life.

She said: ‘I didn’t realise that past events actually have formed my identity and how I feel with things, so it was interesting seeing how events that I think are little actually have a huge impact on me.’

The brave student now plans to become a bereavement counsellor when she graduates this year. 

For confidential support, log on to samaritans.org or call the Samaritans on 116123.