News, Culture & Society

Tatler magazine reveals its guide to posh nurseries

  • Tatler has given a glimpse into the nurseries of the poshest children
  • The posh person’s bible said children should have a pet woodlouse in a box
  • Upper class children have rocking horses to prepare them for ‘Sloane’ life

A cot, a toy box and a changing table are usually top of the list for new parents kitting out their nurseries in time for the arrival of a new baby.

But now society bible Tatler has produced a guide to help you upgrade your bog-standard nursery to a haven fit for the most well-bred babies. 

In an article called ‘What posh people keep in their nurseries’, the magazine gave new mums and dads tips on what distinguishes an upper class nursery from an altogether more common version. 

And it seems tell-tale signs include old books, conkers and – bizarrely – a woodlouse.

Tatler advises that a posh nursery will be filled with hand me down toys and clothes

The guide revealed that all posh tots will have the finest toys; including Sylvanian Families, luxury dollhouses and a dressing up box.

It said: ‘Expect to find Sylvanian Family members literally everywhere. They’ll be wedged down the side of an armchair, having scaled its Everest-like back, only to plunge hopelessly down again when their hiking rope (piece of string) snapped. 

Perhaps the most bizarre identifying feature of a posh nursery singled out by Tatler is a dead woodlouse.

The magazine, known for its well to do readership, said posh nurseries will also have books passed down through the generations

The magazine, known for its well to do readership, said posh nurseries will also have books passed down through the generations

The magazine implies that the insect, common in older houses, acts as a well-to-do child’s first pet. 

‘The pet woodlouse named something like Peter or Agent Midnight, found hustling around the log basket next to the fireplace downstairs, has now been put into its own luxury accommodation, ie a matchbox, and has curiously been curled up into a ball for more than a week’ the article explained. 

Other nursery must-haves included a rocking horse to prepare little ones for their ‘Sloane’ futures, a doll’s house passed down the generations, and a collection of good old fashioned conkers.

Tatler advised keeping a dressing up box filed with expensive costume jewelry and cheap clothes, with a piggy bank reserved for tooth fairy money only. 


  • A rocking horse: To prepare them for a love of horses
  • A doll’s house: Must be passed down through the generations
  • Sylvanian Families: The posh toy of choice – often go missing
  • Old books: Classic children’s books such as Peter Rabbit
  • Conkers: Pickled to make them indestructible
  • Dressing-up box: Filled with parents’ old clothes
  • Piggy bank: No notes allowed
  • School: An area reserved for playing teachers with stuffed animals 
  • Woodlouse – Most likely dead and kept as a pet