Are you dreading this year’s Christmas parties, worried that you’ll embarrass yourself by forgetting people’s names? Well, I have good news for you: my memory system — which I’ve honed over many decades — will ensure that you’ll always be able to put a name to a face. I’ve shown in front of audiences that I can remember up to 1,500 names of people I’ve only just met. Here’s how you can use the same tricks…
FIVE GOLDEN RULES
First, you need to learn the basic rules for remembering names. If you apply them properly, I guarantee that you’ll improve your memory for names by about 20 per cent. Then, if you want to take care of the remaining 80 per cent, I’ll teach you the rest of the system . . .
Rule 1: Be sure you properly hear what the other person has said. It’s not embarrassing to say: ‘Sorry, I didn’t get your name.’
Rule 2: Now try to spell the name. ‘Oh, is that L- o- r- r- a- i- n- e?’ The great thing about doing this is that you’ll be corrected if you’re wrong — ‘No, it’s L- o- r- a- y-n- e’ — and that gives you more time to recall the name. But what if it’s an easy-to-spell name, like Jones or Carter? Don’t worry about looking an idiot: the person will still feel flattered because you’re showing an interest.
Memory expert Harry Lorayne believes his system can ensure you remember the names of people you’ve just met
Rule 3: Make a remark about the name. You might say that it’s a name you’ve heard before, for instance. Or that you went to school with someone of the same name. If you think it’s an unusual name, it’s fine to say that, too. Any remark will do. Again, you’re showing an interest.
Rule 4: Use the name during your initial conversation. Don’t go overboard with this rule, or it will sound forced. But try to introduce the name seamlessly into your chat — for instance: ‘Gosh, Jim, I never thought of it that way.’
Rule 5: Use the name again when you say goodbye. Don’t just say, ‘I’ll see you later’; instead, say: ‘I’ll see you later, Julia.’
MY FAILSAFE VISUAL TRICKS
All right, that was the easy part. But what I’m going to teach you next really won’t take much effort at all. And it should guarantee that you’ll never again be at a loss for someone’s name.
When you’re introduced to someone new, you will simply make his or her name visible in your mind by coming up with a Substitute Word or Thought for it.
Eventually, you’ll be able to do this with any name, no matter what its length or complexity.
Let’s start with what I call ‘zip’ names — because they’re the type that tend to zip in one ear and straight out of the other, without lodging in the memory.
Say you’ve just been introduced to Mr Pukczyva — pronounced puckshiva. You’re going to start by breaking his name into syllables — puck-shiv-a — and then forming an image in your mind.
In his case, you might visualise an ice hockey puck shivering — and suddenly all those consonants would become memorable.
Puck shiver = Pukczyva.
Harry advises thinking of a substitute word for a persons name to make it visible in your mind (file image)
Ms Smolenski? Small–lens–ski. This time, if you imagine a small lens (camera, or contact lens) skiing, then the name no longer zips past.
Now I’ll give you a few names that I’ve broken down into similar sounding words. See if you can form your own visual images from each of these:
Morales (more Alice)
Jeffries (chef freeze or frees)
Cusack (cue sack)
McKenzie (me can see)
Thompson (thump son)
Slocombe (slow comb)
SOME PEOPLE ARE ‘EASY’
Of course, many names already have a meaning — such as Brown, Taylor, Hart, Barnes, Green, Rivers, Wood, Shaw and Piper — so linking them to an image is even simpler.
And there’s another category of names: those that automatically conjure up a related image. The name Caruso, for example, might well make you think of an opera singer. Hudson or Jordan might make you think of a river; Campbell might make you ‘see’ a can of soup.
He says a name with a meaning or personal association can also help memory (file image)
Personal experience also works. When I hear the name Browning, I visualise a Browning automatic rifle — a weapon I was quite familiar with during World War II.
A childhood friend of mine named Elliott was a tennis nut. So whenever I hear the name Elliott, I think of tennis.
After you’ve used my Substitute Words and Thoughts principle for a while, you’ll form standard images for certain names. For example, I always visualise a blacksmith’s hammer for Smith, a garden for Gordon, an ice-cream cone for Cohen.
The same is true for common prefixes and suffixes. For Mc or Mac, I see a macintosh; for -son, the sun; for -berg, an iceberg; for -law, a judge’s gavel; for -baum, a bomb, and so on.
Remember that it’s better for you to come up with your own Substitute Words and Thoughts— your very own ridiculous pictures.
The ones I’ve given you aren’t likely to stick in your mind, because you haven’t used your imagination. That’s what really locks in a name.
NOW TOM, DICK AND HARRY . . .
For first names, come up with a Substitute Word or Thought in exactly the same way as you would for a surname.
For Bill, I always see a dollar bill. For Mary, a wedding (marry); George, jaws; Harry, hairy; Sylvia, silver; Bernard, burn hard; Tom or Thomas, tom-tom drums; Tony, toe knee; Robert, robber; Jim, gym; Anita, an anteater; Mike, microphone — and so forth.
He advises using a substitute word for first names and surnames e.g. Sylvia, silver (file image)
Now you have a go. Think of a Substitute Word or Thought for the following: Bob, Bruce, Wendy, Sally, Phyllis, Ernie, Dennis, Molly, Douglas, Nancy, Ashley, Thelma, Ben, Harold, Gary, Richard, Carl, Victoria, Anthony, Boris, Fred, Donald, Edward, Lillian, Gladys, Alex, Andy, Mark, Vincent, Walter, John, Isabel.
JOB LOT? IT’S NOT COMPLICATED
If you want to remember both Christian and surname, include a Substitute Word or Thought for each in your mental image.
If you like, you can also include something that will remind you that the person is, say, a doctor, a teacher, an army general, an actor or a writer. It’s easy if you thread it all together into the one memorable image.
Here’s an example: you meet a Dr Harry Gordon and you’d like to remember his full name and the fact that he’s a doctor.
Personally, I’d visualise a garden (Gordon).
It would be a hairy (Harry) garden, with hair covering the foliage and the flowers.
And there would be some gigantic stethoscopes growing in it, too.
See? It’s effortless!
BIG EARS? A FACE TO REMEMBER
‘Oh, I recognise your face, but I don’t remember your name.’ During my long career as a memory expert, I’ve heard this remark thousands of times. But I’ve never heard it the other way around — ‘I remember your name but I don’t recognise your face.’
This makes perfect sense, because most of us are visually-minded as opposed to audio-minded. That is, we remember what we see much better than what we hear.
So when it comes to names and faces, why not take advantage of the fact that it’s the face we usually recognise?
Harry advises also connecting the substitute word with a memorable feature (file image)
A lady in her 80s once told me that she was starting to have trouble remembering all the names of her many grandchildren. Then she started to apply the system I’m about to teach you — and the problem was solved.
You’ve already applied the first step, hearing a name and deciding on a Substitute Word or Thought in order to make that name meaningful. Now, look at the person’s face and select what you think is his or her outstanding feature.
It can be anything: high forehead, low forehead, bald head, thick eyebrows, arched eyebrows, close-set eyes, big or small ears, large earlobes, big nose, sunken cheeks, wide mouth, moustache, beard, thin lips, cleft in chin, wrinkles, warts, pimples, dimples.
What you select may not be what I or someone else would select as the outstanding feature, but that doesn’t matter: it’s what’s outstanding to you that counts.
So look — really look — at that face. Now, connect your Substitute Word or Thought for the name to the outstanding feature of the face. You want one to remind you of the other.
Let’s say you’ve just been introduced to Mr Smith. You think of a blacksmith’s hammer and you decide to connect that to his obvious (to you) thick lips.
My own image would be of the blacksmith’s hammer hammering those lips, which is what’s making them thick. Thick lips = Smith.
Make sure you properly visualise this silly mental image, because the tendency when meeting a Jones or a Smith is to think: ‘Oh, there’s no way I’ll forget an easy name like that; no need to bother with a mental picture.’ Then, of course, that’s the one you don’t remember.
Mr Robrum has bushy eyebrows. See a bottle of rum over each eye instead of eyebrows and you ‘rob’ them. Bushy Eyebrows = Robrum.
That’s it. Next time you see those people, you’d definitely remember their names.
Mind you, I’m often asked by someone who’s yet to apply this system in real life: ‘But what if I see Mr Robrum again and, yes, the bushy eyebrows reminds me of ‘robbing rum’ but I call him Mr Rumrob instead of Mr Robrum?’
The answer is that this won’t happen because true memory tells you the correct name. Remember, my systems are simply aids to your fabulous God-given memory.
It’s your true memory that will take over once you’ve met Mr Robrum a few times: without even thinking of the image for his name, you’ll find you know it anyway.
To put my system into practice, start by assigning made-up names to pictures of faces in this newspaper. Apply the system you’ve just learned to a few pictures, then go back and see if you remember the names.
After that, you can start using the system on all the people you meet. I promise that you’ll start to see results right away.
In fact, here’s a guarantee: the first time you try my system for remembering names and faces in a small group of people, you’ll remember 50 per cent more names than you ever did before.
The second time you try it, you’ll remember 75 per cent more. And the third time, 100 per cent more.
Adapted from Simple Secrets For Keeping Your Brain Young, by Harry Lorayne (Robinson, 2007, 2017. To order a copy for £7.99, visit mailbookshop.co.uk/books or call 0844 571 0640, p&p is free on orders over £15. Offer valid until December 14, 2017.