Delivering the perfect wedding speech is far from easy, and once someone crosses the line, it’s hard to bounce back. Not only have they ruined the moment, but there is a good chance they’ll never live down their blunder.
Proving that people never forget bad speeches, Reddit users shared the worst and most offensive things they ever heard someone say at a wedding in a 2018 thread that is so cringe-worthy it keeps resurfacing online two years later.
Guests recalled everything from a best man who paid tribute to the groom’s late wife to a maid of honor who attempted an awkward joke about masturbation in front of the newlyweds’ horrified family.
Unforgettable: Reddit users have shared the worst and most offensive things they ever heard someone say at a wedding in a cringe-worthy thread (stock image)
For real? One of the worst was the man who used his wedding speech as an opportunity to publicly ask his wife for a divorce
‘The only thing the best man said was “Well, we’re all here today for one reason, a good woman died. May she Rest In Peace.” About the groom’s late (first) wife, who passed away over 10 years ago,’ one person recalled.
Another Reddit user proudly admitted to making an uncomfortable joke about the groom being a widower.
‘I’d like to take this time to welcome the bride into our family. I’ve been told you have a clean bill of health so let’s hope the third time’s the charm,’ the person wrote, explaining: ‘I said that at my father’s 3rd wedding. He’s a two-time widower.’
Some left wedding guests feeling extremely uncomfortable with their embarrassing insinuations about the brides’ sex lives.
One Reddit user recalled a maid of honor saying: ‘”We have so many great memories together. One of my favorites was when you taught me about the jets in the hot tub.” …obviously implying masturbation.’
The person said the joke was told ‘in front of a room of three hundred people’ and there was ‘dead silence.’
Yikes: Guests recalled everything from the best man making jokes about the groom being a widower to the drunk man who threw up before he could even deliver his speech
Someone else said the best man at their cousin Paul’s wedding made a mortifying comment about the bride going from riding horses to riding her new husband.
‘He gave a speech about how the bride, Julia, used to love horse-riding, but after she started dating Paul she was no longer interested in horse riding. The best man said, “Women just need something big and masculine between their legs.” Cue a load of shocked speechless grandparents,’ the person wrote.
One of the most outrageous speeches in the thread ended with ‘the Best Man getting drunk and asking his current wife for a divorce into the microphone because “she just won’t f*****g leave me unless I make a big deal of it.”‘
In another, the groom’s mother made it clear that she wished her son had married someone else — someone who was also at the wedding.
‘Mother of the groom called the wife “Elizabeth” in her speech,’ one Reddit user explained. ‘Elizabeth wasn’t her name. Elizabeth was the name of the groom’s best friend who happened to be an attractive woman. More attractive than the wife. Elizabeth is who the mother wanted her son to marry. Elizabeth was there, too.’
Meanwhile, one father of the groom made it clear that he was a huge fan of his new daughter-in-law.
‘My dad made a speech at my brother’s wedding saying that if my brother didn’t get to her first he would have married her. It was so awkward and so inappropriate,’ someone admitted.
Awkward: One mother of the groom called her new daughter-in-law the wrong name, while someone’s dad made it clear that he wishes he could have married the bride
Some of the biggest wedding mishaps occurred when a guest decided to take the mic after having way too much to drink.
One person recalled the best man waddling up to the podium, visibly drunk.
‘He opens up his folder with his speech in it. Opens his mouth to say his first words and projectile vomits directly over the podium,’ the commenter explained. ‘He says into the mic, “Whoops that’s not what I meant to say.” Groomsmen drag him off and away.’
Then there were those who insulted the bride — whether they meant to or not.
‘Best Man speech: “Back in high school when Bill first told me he liked Jackie I said Jackie!? Ewww! But that’s how I knew Bill really liked her for who she was as a person.” ….Jackie was not very attractive,’ someone shared in the thread.
One person recounted being at a wedding where someone said: ‘Well this wedding was nice and all, but I’m sure all the married couples here know it’s not a real marriage until you start having children!’
The Reddit user noted that ‘the bride was infertile.’
And then more often than not, people who are uncomfortable with being in the spotlight and end up going on nervous tangents during their speeches.
‘I wasn’t there to see it, but a buddy of mine told me about a bad one he witnessed his cousin give. Basically, best man got all flustered/froze up, didn’t know what to say, etc., and he ended up congratulating my friend (who was not the groom, mind you) on being accepted into the University of Michigan. Go Blue?’ one person shared.