Woman turns lesbian after coming off the pill reveals how contraception ‘dulls’ sex drive

An Australian corporate worker who turned lesbian after coming off the pill has revealed she felt ‘dull’ while on contraception, and is now like a ‘horny teenage boy’ with her new girlfriend.

Tessa Bona, 30, from Melbourne, had been taking the contraceptive pill since the age of 15 when she decided to ditch it in 2021 – and within just three weeks she noticed a raft of physical and emotional changes.

‘The last few years I was on the pill I felt dull,’ Tessa told the Kyle and Jackie O Show.

‘As soon as I came off it I felt like a horny teenage boy. It’s crazy how much it affects us.’

‘The last few years I was on the pill I felt dull,’ Tessa told the Kyle and Jackie O Show (Kyle and Jackie pictured)

Tessa explained that while she used to be ‘one hundred per cent into men’ and wanted the ‘white picket fence, kids and all that’, when she came off the pill she felt ‘like a different person’.

‘There’s been a definite shift in my mentality,’ she said.

‘I was suddenly like, women are hot. When I found my now-partner Phoebe I was like this is definitely for me.’

Tessa added: ‘Phoebe is end game for me. I literally cannot see myself with anyone else. 

‘Thank God I came off the pill. 

‘I’m living with my best friend and I couldn’t be happier.’

Tessa Bona, 30, from Melbourne, had been taking the contraceptive pill since the age of 15 when she decided to ditch it in 2021 – and within just three weeks she noticed a raft of physical and emotional changes (Tessa left, Phoebe Chakar right)

Speaking previously to FEMAIL, Tessa said she ‘genuinely feels like a different person in the best way possible’ since making the change. 

‘While on the pill I had only been dating men, so in my opinion the hormone changes definitely had an impact on that. I can appreciate that men are attractive, but I’m not sexually drawn to them currently like I was when I was on it,’ Tessa told Daily Mail Australia. 

‘I also think it absolutely changed who and what I was attracted to, within a month of being off it, I was a lot more curious and drawn to women.’

Not only did Tessa notice she was suddenly drawn to women, she also lost weight, lost fluid retention, felt less fatigued and instead more alive and ‘more excited with life again’.

‘I almost felt like my emotions weren’t regulating, like I couldn’t feel high highs or low lows, it was almost a numb feeling.’

Tessa said she was ‘relieved’ to stop using the pill because she had ‘no idea that impact it was having’ on her body. 

Tessa said she was ‘relieved’ to stop using the pill because she had ‘no idea that impact it was having’ on her body (Tessa and Phoebe pictured)

In a viral TikTok video that has been viewed more than 305,000 times, Tessa’s girlfriend Phoebe said she’s also keen to stop using the pill – but expressed concerns over if it’ll change who she’s attracted to.

‘So I’m still on the pill and now I’m planning to get off it because I ain’t gonna get preg (pregnant),’ Phoebe said and pointed to Tessa.

‘What happens if I’m not attracted to her anymore?’ she said, then Tessa added: ‘Cause that’s some bulls***.’

Speaking previously to FEMAIL, Tessa said she ‘genuinely feels like a different person in the best way possible’ since making the change (Tessa and Phoebe pictured)

Phoebe asked whether anyone else has experienced changes in their sexuality after they’ve stopped using the pill.

Hundreds offered their stories and some claimed the ‘same thing’ happened to them.

‘I got off birth control and literally became a lesbian,’ one woman wrote.

‘I was engaged for four years, went off the pill, didn’t like him anymore,’ another said.

A third added: ‘So true! Was with my ex for eight years (on the pill before I met him) when I got off the pill in January, we broke up in July.’

But others said they experienced no changes, or at least not many.

‘I started dating a girl for the first time! then got off my birth control and nothing changed as far as attraction but I went thru the same panic,’ one woman wrote.

Another said: ‘I had the opposite with my husband, came off and fell even more In love with him.’

A 2014 study published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Science found hormonal contraception ‘may have critical unintended effects on women’s relationships’.

It followed 118 heterosexual couples who met while the woman was on birth control and found she was less attracted to her partner when she went off the pill.

However, the findings show a woman’s attraction to her partner depended on how conventionally good looking he was.

When they went off birth control, women were more likely to still be attracted to their partner if they ‘had a relatively more attractive face’ than if they weren’t conventionally handsome by ‘evolutionary standards’.

Florida State graduate student who is the lead author on the study, Michelle Russell, told TIME if your husband is not conventionally attractive and you go off the pill, his attractiveness might bother you more than before.

‘Women who choose a partner when they’re on hormonal contraceptives and then stop taking them will prioritise their husband’s attractiveness more than they would if they were still on it,’ she said.

She said the change could be because of fluctuating estrogen levels or many hormonal reasons and added the research should not dissuade women from taking contraceptives as it is only the results of one finding.

‘Any drug that you take, people want to be informed consumers. This is just one factor women might want to consider when deciding whether or not to use them,’ she said.