A woman claims she has been uninvited from her sister’s wedding after refusing to be her bridesmaid.
The 28-year-old, who has declined an invitation to be a bridesmaid before, argued she didn’t want the stress of pandering to her ‘bridezilla’ sister and wanted to enjoy the day.
Posting on Reddit’s Am I the A**hole forum, the would-be bridesmaid from the US claimed her 23-year-old sister has uninvited her from the wedding altogether in retaliation.
She added some family members had taken her sister’s side, which made her wonder if she was the one being unreasonable.
Bridezilla! A woman from the US has revealed she was uninvited from her sister’s wedding after refusing to be bridesmaid due to the demands she was making (stock image)
The woman explained that she didn’t have the ‘energy’ to learn an elaborate dance for her sister’s bachelorette party or spend $450 on a dress, and now she’s been banned from the wedding
However after reading her story many people left comments in support of the shunned bridesmaid.
The original poster said: ‘I come from a big extended family. Including me and my sister. There are 24 female cousins and 17 male cousins.
‘Half of the cousins are already married. When the first one ever asked me to be a bridesmaid I declined.
‘When I attend a wedding I want to have fun, eat food and dance.
In exchange I will get you a gift. I do not want to spend my energy, time and money on your big day.’
Many people were sympathetic to the woman’s dilemma and recalled experiences of their own when they were caught up in weddings where the bride expected a little too much
She added she also was not a fan of the idea of a bachelorette party or a bridal shower – and added when she gets married herself she will not ask people to attend any of these events.
‘Now my younger sister is getting married,’ she continued.
‘She asked me to be a bridesmaid and I declined. And I did it very gently.
‘I told her sorry, but with working full time, being in the final stages of preparing my thesis and teaching some summer classes; that I would not make a good bridesmaid.’
Another factor that affected her decision (that she withheld from her sister) was that the younger sibling was being a ‘total bridezilla’.
She said the bride-to-be was planning on asking the bridesmaids to wear dresses costing $450 and wanted to have a weekend-long bachelorette party in Las Vegas.
The poster added her sister wanted the guests on the bachelorette party to have dance classes so they can ‘learn this elaborate dance to “surprise” her with.’
She added: ‘I do not have the energy for all that’.
Some people joked the bride-to-be would most likely get married for a second time due to her demanding attitude
After declining her sister’s invitation to be bridesmaid, the poster claimed the youngest sibling took back her invitation to the wedding.
She added her mother and some of her aunties are taking her little sister’s side, so she has been left wondering if she is in the wrong.
After posting about her dilemma, others were quick to tell the older sibling she was not in the wrong.
One person said: ‘Weddings are not a summons, it’s a invitation. Meaning you have an option. Not sure when did it become accepted to try and force someone into a wedding by emotional blackmail.’
Another said the poster was being perfectly reasonable in the face of ‘ridiculous’ demands from the bride-to-be – which reflected how weddings have become bigger and more expensive in recent years.
They wrote: ‘We’ve gone from a bridal shower to a shower and a bachelorette party, to a bachelorette weekend at an expensive destination.
‘Not to mention the wedding day with the dress, shoes, hair and makeup.’
For the most part people were in agreement that the bride was being unreasonable and too demanding in this situation
One woman drew on her own experience and said a former best friend of hers who was getting married was upset when she had to pull out of the bachelorette party after being offered her dream job.
The woman wrote: ‘I talked to her and her answer was, “This is the trip of your life with your friends and you’re just going to put it to waste for a job? This job isn’t as important as us and this trip”.
‘She made me felt super guilty even though I needed the job and she knew it.’
The poster added she and the bride in question were no longer best friends.
Another person said: ‘I’m still recovering from the 3-day wedding I had the past weekend and unfortunately the bride is my boyfriend’s sister-in-law, which means that I not only followed and heard all the wedding prep and stress for a year, I also had to sit close to her during meals (boyfriend was a groomsmen for his brother).’
Quite a few people admitted they were prepared to tell the original poster she was in the wrong when they first began reading her story – but added by the time they had finished reading they were completely on her side.
Some people tried their best to mediate the situation and offer constructive solutions, despite agreeing the younger sister was being unreasonable
One person said they were confued by her statement that there was so much work involved, but it soon became clear.
‘I’ve never known someone to expect a whole choreographed dance. And have to go to multiple dance classes to learn it.’
Another said that, while the argument was ‘likely to burn bridges’ between the sisters, the bride’s demands ‘sound really expensive’.
Lots of others joked the woman could always attend her younger sister’s second wedding – because if the bride’s attitude was anything to go by, the marriage probably wouldn’t last.
Trying to mediate the situation, some people suggested ways in which the older sister could repair the relationship with her younger sibling – even though they agreed the bride-to-be was being unreasonable.
While one woman said she thought the original poster was in a difficult situation, she said it might be worth biting the bullet and agreeing to some of her sister’s demands in this case.
She wrote: ‘Sometimes we all do things for siblings that maybe are a bit of a chore.’
Another person took the original poster to task over some of her arguments but ultimately agreed the bride was being too demanding.
They wrote: ‘The idea that weddings are for your fun and not about celebrating the married couple is self centered.
‘If someone asked you to speak at a funeral would you be like, “Nah, I want to be able to arrive late or leave early”. Course not because it’s not about you.’
‘Well weddings and funerals are two side of the same coin in my opinion in that it’s not about you.
‘That said, your sister is making ridiculous demands of her bridesmaids.’
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