The parents of children who bully other kids could be fined up to $500 in a plan proposed by a prominent anti-bullying advocate.
Moreland City Councillor, Oscar Yildiz, who has worked as a teacher for 22 years and founded an anti-bullying foundation, says it’s time parents stood up and took responsibility for their children’s actions.
‘Parents don’t take responsibility. I’ve seen time and time again kids self harming, kids committing suicide. I’m close with 7 families who have lost their kids to this,’ he tells Daily Mail Australia.
Moreland City Councillor, Oscar Yildiz, says parents of bullies should be fined $500 and that they need to start taking responsibility
‘In serious cases, parents should be fined, they should be held responsible. I think $500 is not a big ask especially if the child is repeatedly behaving poorly.’
‘You think about PTSD, what people suffer after they go to war or are survivors of a terrorist attack, they’re comparing that to someone whose experience ongoing bullying – kids are suffering from PTSD.’
The idea of fining parents is currently being debated in America where Pennsylvanian lawmakers want to implement a policy that would require parents to pay up to $750 if their child is a habitual bully.
The statistics back home are alarming. In Australia 1 in 4 students report being bullied between elementary and high school. Every day 160,000 kids stay home from school because they’re afraid of being bullied and those who are bullied are 9 times more likely to attempt or contemplate suicide.
While not all bullying ends in suicide, suicide is the leading cause of death for our nations young people.
Mr Yildiz says bullies learn this behavior at home, from parents and toxic living situations.
Amy Everett, known as Dolly, took her own life – aged 14 after becoming overwhelmed by the vile taunts of online bullies
In Australia 1 in 4 students report being bullied between elementary and high school and every day 160,000 kids stay home from school because they’re afraid of being bullied
‘Schools don’t teach bullying we just try and respond to it, there’s no bullying DNA, it’s learnt behavior and it can be un-learnt,’ he says.
‘I hear things when parents pick up their kids’ stuff like, “you effing idiot, you are dumb, just shut up and listen to me, you’re useless, you’re a waste of space.”.’
‘A child who is bought up in a loving home where there is laughter, they’re going to go to school and demonstrate that. If kids are bought up in in dictatorial manner then they’re going to go to school and exert that physiological pain onto others,’ he says.
‘It’s about teaching the underpinning values of respect – the apple never falls far from the tree.’
Mr Yildiz says another issue that needs to be discussed is giving schools the power to expel children who bully other students.
‘A school can’t expel a child for bullying and that’s really sad. Last year a girl from a school in Victoria ended up in a coma.’
The idea of fining parents is currently being debated in Pennsylvania where some lawmakers think parents should be fined $750 if their child is a bully
‘I saw on camera what that child did to that girl – she almost broke her neck, she wore an neck brace for six months. She still hasn’t gone back to school.’
‘I met with the school principals and in any other country the child would have been expelled but that child was suspended for three days.’
Even in less severe cases the memories of schoolyard bullying can stay with the victim well into their adulthood.
‘It was a really toxic friendship group. All of us were new to Facebook and phones. These girls, who were meant to be my friends were basically always mean to me,’ a bullying victim who grew up in Tasmania tells Daily Mail Australia.
‘Saying that what I ate would catch up with me, or that I didn’t eat enough or that I had too many pimples,’
My Yildiz says schools should be given the power to expel bullies after a child who almost broke another girls neck was given a three day suspension
‘They told me everyone hated me and their parents liked the other friends more. I alienated myself within the group, I didn’t really talk to anyone, just made the occasional joke.’
‘My best friend of four years, we grew up together, told me her family didn’t like me. The group had to keep being called up to the principles office, parents knew it was going on but nothing happened. I felt heartbroken,’ she says.
‘I think it taught me long term not to hold onto toxic people.’
Within advocacy groups debate rages about how best to combat Australia’s bullying epidemic. If the responsibility should fall to parents, teachers or on the bullies themselves.
Mr Yildiz thinks it’s time for parents to stand up.
‘Those parents need to change their child’s behaviors because it can have such a massive impact on lives,’ he says.