Should the birthday child ‘win’ every game played at their party?
It’s the question swirling on children’s party entertainer Natalie Faulkner’s mind after she noticed a common request from parents who have booked her to host events.
The 35-year-old Australian mother, who runs Strawberry Fundaes, has been working in the children’s entertainment industry for more than 20 years.
But recently, the party entertainer said she has been getting the same request from different families asking her to ensure their child wins every game to avoid disappointment.
She said the request has become so frequent, she has even brought extra prizes so the birthday child and one of their friends can both win to make the game fair.
Children’s party entertainer Natalie Faulkner (pictured) wants to know if the birthday boy or girl should ‘win’ every game
The 35-year-old mother has worked in the kid’s entertainment industry for more than 20 years
‘Of course I NEVER want an upset child, especially at their own special party, but it got me wondering,’ she wrote on her blog Confessions of a Costume Character.
‘I seriously have started to get nervous about it. I have never felt this way when it comes to playing party games. I have always felt confident and in control of the kids.
‘I am always calm and diplomatic and have never really had a problem but now I literally feel scared to not reward the birthday girl or boy for every game.
‘My mouth gets dry and I feel this hot rush come over me just before I pick my winner. It’s like they could be a ticking time bomb of emotion, and if they “go off” and get upset I will feel like I ruined the whole party.’
She said the request has become so frequent, she has even brought extra prizes so the birthday child and one of their friends could wins so it ‘doesn’t look too rigged’ (stock image)
The party entertainer has been getting the same request from different families asking her to ensure their child wins every game to avoid disappointment.
Natalie said her main focus was to ‘always make sure the child has the best day possible’.
‘So I now bring extra, extra prizes so the birthday girl or boy wins as well as one of their friends (so it doesn’t look too “rigged”),’ she said.
‘I try my best to ‘read the situation’ and so far I am mostly spot on but there have been some definite moments.
‘Like if a sibling doesn’t win as well ( hard when there’s five siblings!!) or if they don’t both get a prize exactly the same.’
Reminiscing about her own childhood birthday parties, Natalie said she doesn’t recall any moment growing up where it was simply all about winning the game.
‘I started to think back to my own birthday parties and ones I attended as a kid,’ she said.
‘We NEVER had a prize in every layer of the pass the parcel and we certainly didn’t win every game. We learnt what it felt like to lose.’
Reminiscing about her own childhood birthday parties, Natalie said she doesn’t recall any moment growing up where it was simply all about winning the game
Natalie said she wondered if children were to succeed in everything, how would they cope with their first real-life rejection?
‘If kids are always winning and never losing, how will they take their first job rejection or if they are not accepted into uni,’ she asked.
‘What about the first person that turns them down on a date or if they apply for a rental home and don’t make the cut? Are we setting kids up for emotional downfall?
‘I ask this as a mother and not just a children’s entertainer. If parents want me to ensure their child wins at every party, I will do that because that is my job,’ she said.
‘I am here to give your kids the best party!! But as a mother, I want to know – has there been a shift? What have I missed?’.
Melbourne’s parenting expert Sharon Witt (pictured) said she disagreed with parents who wanted their children to win all the party games
Melbourne’s parenting expert Sharon Witt said she disagreed with parents who wanted their children to win all the party games.
‘As a parent, you’re raising resilient children to accept that you’re not always going to be a winner,’ Ms Witt told Daily Mail Australia.
‘There has definitely been a shift in parents who are wanting to wrap their kids in cotton wool instead of letting them experience failure.
‘Party games are all about having fun, participation and sharing the excitement of other people winning – not what you get out of it.’
She likened party games to the real world.
‘You’re not to get every promotion at work,’ she said.
By letting children win every game, Ms Witt said this would leave them struggling to cope with setbacks in their teenage years and adult life (stock image)
‘It’s like saying you’re always going to get a pat on the shoulder for turning up for work. Or they say “I don’t like my job because the boss isn’t giving me encouragement like I’m used to”.’
By letting children win every game, Ms Witt said this would leave them struggling to cope with setbacks in their teenage years and adult life.
‘It’s quite problematic for parents to ask party entertainers to ensure their child wins something – that’s not really life,’ she said.
‘If you want your kids to succeed in everything, you’re setting them up for failure and disappointment.
‘Life isn’t fair but it’s all about building blocks of resilience so when things don’t go your way, you can bounce back from that.’