A cancer patient told how her diagnosis strengthened her relationship with her long-distance boyfriend after he moved thousands of miles from home to support her.
Emily Gosling, 31, originally from Bermuda, was living in London when she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in March this year.
Days later Canadian boyfriend Dave Bulters, 31, quit his job and left behind his life in Vancouver to relocate to the UK – even though he and Emily had only been dating for a few months and had never lived in the same city.
The couple, who have since moved back to Canada, told how their time together in London brought them closer together.
Emily Gosling, 31, originally from Bermuda, was living in London when she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in March this year. Days later her Canadian boyfriend Dave Bulters, 31, quit his job in Toronto and moved to be with her. Pictured, the couple in London before treatment
The couple, who have since moved back to Canada, told how their time together in London brought them closer together. Pictured, the couple in Emily’s hospital bed during treatment
The couple moved back to Vancouver in June, stopping off in Capri (left) for a holiday after being given the green light to leave London. Right, the couple in Vancouver in August
‘The one positive thing about the cancer diagnosis was that we got to live together sooner than we’d planned, even though the situation wasn’t quite what we had planned,’ she said.
‘There’s no doubt that the months in London strengthened our relationship. He was by my side the whole time, and while our plan A might have been easier, I wouldn’t trade the time we spent together or the experiences we’ve shared.’
Emily was living in Ontario and working for her family’s Goslings Rum brand when she first met Dave, a restaurant wine director, on a business trip to Vancouver in May 2017.
The pair had an immediate connection but Emily already had plans to move to London so they decided not to pursue a relationship. She relocated to Clapham, south London, in January 2018.
Dave made the plans for the future official by leasing a flat in Toronto, their first home together, with Emily due to move back in April 2019. But just weeks before her flight, Emily was given the devastating cancer diagnosis. Pictured, Emily the day before she started chemo
In May 2019 Emily spent three days in ICU after falling sick during chemotherapy, left. Pictured right, Emily in hospital after her surgery to remove the tumour and one of her ovaries
In May that year Emily returned to Vancouver where she and Dave went on their first official date.
Although both knew that Emily would be in London for at least another year, they decided to pursue a long-distance relationship.
The couple visited between London and Vancouver and spent their phone calls making plans for the future.
‘I knew early on there was something special about Dave, and I was so excited to build a home with him,’ Emily said.
‘During my time in London, many of our phone conversations were spent planning how we’d decorate the flat, the trips we’d go on, and how we’d like to spend our life together.’
Emily’s mother flew to London when she could to visit Emily during her treatment
In September, Emily was told she had developed a second mass on her right ovary. It will be removed next week. Right, Emily while receiving chemotherapy in London
Emily when she left hospital after her surgery. She said: ‘Throughout this whole process, Dave has never made me feel like he was trapped or angry for the unexpected turn our lives took’
Dave made the plans for the future official by leasing a flat in Toronto, their first home together, with Emily due to move back in April 2019.
But just weeks before her flight, Emily was given the devastating cancer diagnosis.
‘I’d been experiencing night sweats, a swollen stomach, kidney pains and fatigue over the previous few weeks and they were getting worse,’ she recalled.
‘My doctor said it could have been due to stress caused by moving countries or a stomach ulcer.’ However diagnosed with ovarian cancer soon afterwards.
She continued: ‘Before I left her office, I was taken to another room so I could absorb the information and call Dave.
In June Emily’s oncologist permitted her to return to Vancouver to complete her treatment. Pictured, Emily back in Canada
‘It was around 5am for him, and I was a little shaky, but he remembers how calm and matter of fact I was. When you hear news like that, your mind goes into survival mode.
‘The afternoon of my diagnosis, I met with a gynaecological oncology surgeon to discuss my options. It was shocking to hear all of this over a few hours. Then a few days later, I had a CT scan to determine whether the cancer had spread, fortunately it hadn’t.’
A week later, Dave arrived in London to support Emily.
She continued: ‘He came to an appointment with my oncologist where we were hoping to arrange a treatment plan for when I returned to Vancouver.
‘What we were told instead was that the tumour was too aggressive, and I’d be starting chemotherapy that evening.
Dave and Emily had only been together a little over a year before he moved to London. Pictured, the couple after they were given the all clear to leave the UK
‘We had about an hour before I had to be back in the hospital, so Dave and I walked to a nearby park.
‘It was there that he told me that he was going to quit his job and move to London. I was so relieved, but I was also so angry because cancer hadn’t only taken over my life, it had taken over his too.’
Emily began chemotherapy at the end of March and underwent surgery in May to remove the tumour, which was 7in long and over 3in wide.
Surgeons also removed her right ovary, right fallopian tube, appendix and lymph nodes, leaving her with 45 staples in her sternum.
In June Emily’s oncologist permitted her to return to Vancouver to complete her treatment.
She continued: ‘Ten weeks after my surgery, we met with my doctor to find out the result of my post-surgery imagery. As much as we were all hoping for the all clear, a new mass had formed, this time on my left ovary.
‘My second surgery is scheduled for 7 October and it’s been a complicated mental and emotional challenge knowing I will be having another surgery.
‘Waking up wondering if I can still have children is a difficult thing to go through once, but I’ll be doing that twice.’
She added: ‘Throughout this whole process, Dave has never made me feel like he was trapped or angry for the unexpected turn our lives took.
‘He is the strongest man I’ve ever met, and he was there for me every step of the way. Something like this brings out the truth in a person, and I feel like I truly know him.’
To see more, visit www.instagram.com/emily-goslings