Keen gardeners with a respect for nature and a passion for plants, look away now.
A collection of excruciating horticultural fails have been gathered by one cheeky Instagram account, known simply as S*** Gardens.
Featuring trees completely swathed in AstroTurf, abandoned ornate fountains at odds with a bleak backdrop of wheelie bins, toilet bowls used as decoration and bras used as planters, there’s little to covet about these plots.
However, despite the name, S*** Gardens claims that inclusion in their hall of fame is nothing to be ashamed of, instead it should be seen as a ‘celebration not a condemnation’.
The account welcomes submissions, with most of the gardens featured so far located in Australia.
S*** Gardens has secured a publishing deal, with a coffee table book due for release next year. Here, Mail Online rounds up the best of the worst…
Bra-vo: An ingenious use of women’s underwear makes for an unusual plant pot
This dashboard oasis is nothing short of extraordinary, but an airbag wouldn’t stand a chance faced with those prickly cacti
Fake it ’til you make it: This gardener thinks nothing of cutting corners and paints over his sun-bleached lawn
The owner of this balcony wasn’t going to be content with a few pot plants, as this cramped palm tree shows
Here’s hoping this string of huge topiary skunks smell better than they look
This budding DJ appears to be hosting an outdoor rave for his brood of hens
Few people are likely to be bowled over by these floral arrangements in broken toilets
Jaw-dropping: Why have a regular postbox when you could have one protruding from the open mouth of a deadly sea fish?
This spiky and suggestive arrangement is likely to raise guests’ eyebrows
Make do and mend: A plumbing solution like no other, but a Wellington boot in place of piping hardly has legs as a long-term home improvement
This skeleton garden ‘monument’ is simply frightful
Women’s underwear features frequently as containers for all manner of plants, trees and flowers on S*** Gardens
It’s in the jeans: A row of denim plant pots are the focal point of this rather bizarre garden
Where technology meets nature: This front yard looks more scrapheap than tranquil garden
Topiary features regularly on S*** Gardens – this tree serving as a rather odd advertisement for a well-known trainer brand
A monstrous beast looms over the rest of this garden, no doubt terrifying all visitors to the property
Take a seat: Most passers by would bench the idea of taking a rest next to this hungry-looking tree
Stark reality: This gardener has done away with greenery completely, cutting off all leaves and branches from his trees, leaving just the trunks on display
Very punny: This extraordinary structure – known as the ‘lavatree’ – boasts a toilet bowl on every branch
A (dried out) fountain looks at odds with its bleak surroundings of bare slabs of paving stones, wheelie bins and a drab window frame
For reasons unknown, this tree has been covered in artificial grass
A tired cherub sits above a symbol for nuclear warfare fashioned out of gravel
In your face: Rather formidable topiary obscures the facade of this apartment block, with the gardener responsible touting his trade beneath them
This Roman warrior’s fighting stance is undermined somewhat by the fairy lights adorning his spear
This water feature bears more of a resemblance to a lavatory than a decorative fountain
This laughing Buddha seems thrilled with his rather suburban surroundings
An otherwise tranquil rock garden bears a political message in pebbles