Dating expert reveals how to spot whether your ex is ‘winter coating’

A new dating trend that sees an old fame coming back from the past in the winter months may have you feeling warm and fuzzy for a small amount of time, but a dating expert has revealed you may end up flying solo once the sun comes out. 

Dating expert and award-winning dating coach Julie Spira revealed to DailyMail.com why the dating craze ‘winter coating’ – which sees your ex running back to you once the cold air starts creep in – may feel ‘comfortable and cozy’ at first, but once the ‘Netflix and chill’ dates come to end, so you will your time with your past lover. 

From how to spot a pesky ex who who only wants you when the cold air blows to avoiding getting attached, Julie revealed everything you need to know about winter coating to DailyMail.com. 

‘Winter coating is when someone recycles an ex during the coldest months of the year to feel warm and fuzzy instead of bearing the worst weather months flying solo until the weather warms up,’ Julie explained. 

She added that the new trend is a variation of the classic ‘cuffing season.’ 

Cuffing season is a ‘familiar dating term that occurs from the fall through Valentine’s Day, with a specific goal of finding someone new to date for the holidays,’ the dating coach said. 

And while it can be tempting to allow your ex back into your life, it’s important to know whether or not they are in it long-term or if they just need someone to keep them warm until the summer. 

Luckily, Julie has revealed some tell tale signs that you may getting winter coated, including only being contacted during frigid temperatures. 

‘When the temperature dramatically lowers, and an ex contacts you to rekindle your relationship, I say to err on caution. 

‘Unless you’re defining the relationship, and they realize you are “the one,” you might end up in a relationship of convenience, and not a lifetime of love.’ the dating coach explained to DailyMail.com

When the winter coating begins you may feel tempted to put your ex on a pedestal, but, more times than not, you will end up being let down. 

‘When you’re being winter coated, it might feel comfortable and cozy, but chances are your relationship won’t be leveling up,’ Julie added. 

And one of the biggest indicators of whether or not you’re being winter coated is what your plans with your past lover look like. 

If you find that the two of you spend most days and nights cuddled up in bed, chances are they are only in it until the season changes.

‘With winter coating, you’ll frequently be staying at home for Netflix and Chill dates and big plans won’t materialize,’ the dating coach told DailyMail.com. 

And while turning to a familiar face during the chilly months may seem like a good idea, the relationship revealed it could end poorly and noted that you should keep in mind why it ended in the first place. 

The relationship coach noted that exes come back during the holidays because many people tend to feel lonelier when the winter breeze begins to roll in

‘The cons of winter coating are, you might get dumped when the weather warms up, or even ghosted if your recycled relationship comes to an end,’ she explained. 

Julie added that ’50 per cent’ of exes reconnect during the holidays. 

The relationship coach noted that this was due to many people feeling lonelier when the winter breeze begins to roll in. 

And although ‘rekindling a former flame is easier than starting anew,’ you should think back tot he relationship itself and the break up.  

‘Remember, you broke up for a reason, and if those issues aren’t addressed during the winter coating season, they will come back to bite you in the spring when you chance wardrobes and partners,’ Julie revealed to DailyMail.com.

And while you know turning to your pesky ex is a bad idea, it can be beneficial to be wrapped around someone’s arms while the snow falls. 

‘The pros of winter coating are, you won’t be saying, “baby it’s cold outside,” while staying facing the mirror alone in your turtleneck and parka or winter coat from your closet.

‘It’s also a benefit during those chilly months to be in the arms of someone who gets you, and where you can develop a flow in your relationship,’ she explained. 

And the dating coach added that winter coating could potentially be ‘beneficial’ for your ‘physical health,’ but, it may only last till the season changes.  

‘Plus, the feeling of hugging, touching, and sex are beneficial for your emotional and physical health,’ Julie told DailyMail.com. 

If you are looking to rekindle with an ex only to discover they are trying out the dating trend on you, Julie said you shouldn’t accept it because you are afraid of being lonely (stock image)

You may have a sense of comfort for a moment, but that’s only if you and your partner are on the same page. 

It’s important to know whether you are in it for the chilly air or if you want something more. 

If you are looking to rekindle with an old flame only to discover they are trying out the new dating trend on you, the dating coach noted that you shouldn’t just accept it because you are afraid of being lonely. 

‘When you realize you’re being winter coated during the cold weather season, rather than jump in with ten toes instead of flying solo, take the time to ask the person who’d like to rekindle your relationship, what they missed about your previous relationship, and address head on why you broke up in the first place,’ Julie explained. 

The dating expert added that prior to agreeing to anything with your past lover, you should take the ‘time to determine if your ex did the inner work to change.’ 

Julie added that you should communicate about what would be different in the relationship if the two of you do decide to hit the ‘reset button.’  

But, if a casual relationship is exactly what you need, then don’t be afraid to enjoy the chill air snuggled up to your past lover.  

‘If both of you are on the same page to have a casual relationship, then enjoy those winter months bundled up together. Understand you might be enjoying a season of fun instead of a lifetime of love,’ Julie told DailyMail.com.