Former escort Samantha X reveals what she told women about their cheating partners

I was having my nails done once when my phone rang. It was a woman’s voice: ‘My husband is a client of yours and I want some answers.’

Her voice was measured but she was angry. I didn’t blame her, I would be too. 

It was bound to happen one day; the wife finding out. The confrontation. Her shock and anger. My guilt and fury at how a man could be so careless. I was now dragged into someone’s mess of a marriage.

I was dubbed Australia’s most high-profile escort at the time and every escort at some point has been on the receiving end of a partner whose world has just been turned upside down. 

Some wives shout and scream, threaten to out you, tell your family. Others just want answers. Most of them are more furious about the money their husbands have spent.

Men make stupid mistakes – this time, this wife snooped and found a trail of emails.

She told me who he was: some surgeon who, in her words, ‘wasn’t particularly attractive with nothing special about him.’ 

I told her I had no idea who he was. She pressed me further, but I couldn’t place him. Clients often blend into nameless, faceless men. 

She went on to say when she busted him, he promised he would stop, that he bought her a sports car and he agreed to finally have children.

The question that she wanted to ask: What did I think about when I was with her husband?

That was it.

She was more concerned about the emotional cheating, whether I wanted to steal her man. I told her the truth – and while this may shock you, every escort will nod their head.

I replied I was thinking about what to have for dinner.

And it was as simple as that. She asked whether she should leave her husband, and while it’s not my place to say, the truth was no.

I get asked a lot – do I feel guilty? Yes and no. 

Someone else’s marriage is none of my business. I wasn’t cheating on anyone; men came to me. 

Maybe they had separate bedrooms – one client hadn’t been intimate with his wife for eight years, yet she divorced him when she found out he sought out intimacy elsewhere. 

But we are all entitled to human touch and connection.

Now that I am out of the game, I no longer want to be part of someone’s sad marriage. And yes, I am regretful I could have been part of another woman’s pain.

Samantha only regrets that she could’ve been the cause of another woman’s pain

But do I think you should leave your cheating husband? Not necessarily. And here’s why:

1) They make stupid mistakes

Men aren’t perfect; no one is. Some see escorts on a whim, a one-off. They’re intrigued, they’re at a work conference, they’re drunk. 

Believe it or not, quite often their bosses pay for it as a treat for the boys – yes, that still happens. Do you really want to throw what is probably a good marriage away for one stupid drunken mistake?

2) They don’t want an affair

Men see escorts because they don’t want to have an affair. They need something extra, a bit of escapism but they don’t want to fall in love because they love you. 

They are emotionally committed to you, but they have needs that aren’t being met at home for whatever reason. 

This is not a blame game; it takes two to tango, and maybe your needs aren’t being met either. Busting him could be a great way to start communicating.

The former call girl explained that she didn’t think it was necessary for women to leave their cheating spouses because hiring an escort is ‘purely transactional’

3) It’s purely transactional

While you will be angry at the amount of money he’s spent, the transaction is there to create a boundary. Escorts don’t fall in love with their clients, and clients rarely fall in love either. It’s an illusion, it’s not real. 

Escorts are paid to listen, to smile, to nod in the right places. Then they go home and get on with their lives and don’t think about your husband one iota. And I guarantee your husband isn’t thinking about her either.

One more thing: I’ve heard more than once relationships improve after one has been busted cheating, that a good dose of reality and a new found appreciation saves marriages. 

Relationships are complex, people are complex, and life isn’t black and white. 

When you’ve got decades of history with someone, is it worth walking away? The choice is yours to make.