A leading sex expert has revealed the reasons high achieving straight women struggle to find love – and issued a chilling warning to career-focused women.
Tracey Cox said that there are more successful high-achieving women than ever before, and they need to be ‘less rigid’ in their choices if they put off finding a partner until their thirties.
The relationship coach added that by the time many career-focused women reach a time they are ready to settle down most of the ‘good men’ are taken.
‘There are more and more single women now because more and more women are high achieving so they’re not like looking for a husband straight away.
‘When you come out of uni, you’ve got this numbers game, loads of women single, loads of men single, and you sort of all hook-up,’ she told the Diary of a CEO podcast.
Tracey Cox said that there are more successful high-achieving women than ever before, and they need to be ‘less rigid’ in their choices if they put off finding a partner until their thirties
‘If your motivation is to get married and have kids, and that’s your only motivation, then you’re going to find a partner early and job done, you’re sorted.
‘But if your motivation isn’t that, if you want to get to university, get your career sorted, and then turn around and have kids at 30, suddenly you’re looking for someone and he’s not there, he’s already been taken up by someone else.
‘Men traditionally don’t like dating high-achieving women, unless they’re high achieving themselves,’ she added.
Tracey said that the number of high achieving women is ‘getting higher’ but the number of high-achieving men is getting lower, so there is less of a pool to choose from for straight women looking to settle down in their thirties of forties.
‘High achieving women like to go for high achieving men.
‘So the answer for the women is to look outside the box, look for the man without a degree.
‘You have to change your wish-list a bit, not be as rigid, think about things like kindness, generosity and sense of humour rather than what he’s earning.
‘General chemistry and attractiveness is enough, you end up happier’.
Tracey said that the number of high achieving women is ‘getting higher’ but the number of high-achieving men is getting lower, so there is less of a pool to choose from for straight women looking to settle down in their thirties of forties
The sex expert added that the biggest lie women are told is that they can ‘have it all’.
‘These high achievers have compromised their chances of finding a partner by putting it all into their career you can’t have it all.
She added that not being able to find a partner has ‘nothing to do with you’ and ‘doesn’t mean you’re not attractive’.
‘You’re probably less marketable because you’re too intelligent and some men would be freaked by that and you’re too successful,’ she went on.
Tracey’s passionate speech appeared to divide her followers, many believe women shouldn’t striving for more.
‘The high achieving women are protecting their peace and not trying to sign up to take care of someone. The point is they’d prefer to be single and enjoy life than be less “rigid” with their standards. We actually don’t need to ask women to change something about what they’re doing, it isn’t their responsibility,’ one woman wrote.
‘Being a high-achieving woman doesn’t have to come with a price tag. No woman should need to lower her standards for the sake of getting married & having children at a certain age,’ agreed another.
Others blamed men for not being good enough for strong women.
‘It’s not because we’re not looking for husbands. It’s because this country and most of the people in it are BROKEN. Men for some reason don’t put in the work they need to heal themselves, women often will,’ one woman said.
Tracey’s passionate speech appeared to divide her followers, many believe women shouldn’t striving for more
‘Let’s stop calling women “high achieving” and call it what it is – too many men are doing the bare minimum. Let’s stop putting it on women,’ one woman slammed.
Men weighed in on the debate as well.
‘Men who don’t have insecurity complexes (there are plenty) are not intimidated by anyone, especially women.
We are just not attracted to women who value superficial corporate status over love, loyalty, family, and romance. I’m sure someone will come along and still try to force me into the “insecurity” box but worry not gonna work… we want women who will respect and cherish us in the beginning, not those who just wait at the finish line and try to jump into the arms of the winners,’ one man said.
Another man said he would be thrilled to be with a work-focused woman.
‘Honestly, if someone wants to make me a house husband and I can cook, clean, and tend to the garden I’ll be stoked.’
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