Parents left divided after dads left children’s party to go to the pub

A woman has sparked a debate online after asking whether it is ‘rude’ and ‘hurtful’ that two dads left a child’s birthday party to go to the pub. 

The UK-based woman asked people for their thoughts on the situation in a post on parenting forum Mumsnet.

She explained that her friend threw a party at a play centre for her child but provided alcoholic drinks and a ‘catered spread’ for adults. 

However not long after arriving two of the dads went to a pub a few doors down and didn’t return to the party. 

Many rushed to the comments with some saying they ‘don’t see the issue’, while others said it was ‘rude.’

The post read: ‘Friend had a kids’ party this weekend, play centre type place but booze included. Parents generally all friends and always at each other parties etc

‘One of the dads arrived, promptly spoke to another dad and went with him to the pub a couple of doors down and didn’t return. Hosts had paid for a catered spread, provided nice drinks etc

‘The dads often chat and have drinks etc. I could see my friend looked a bit [annoyed]. Would you find this rude and a bit hurtful or not be bothered?’

Some people did think the dads leaving the party was rude with some claiming they were ‘selfish.’

One person wrote: ‘Whilst I think the dads were rude, I can’t stand boozed up kids parties and think they’re a bit pathetic. Have a kids party then meet up for a drink some other time!!’ 

Another said: ‘So let’s change it to a bbq where you’ve invited families. And then two adults left their families and headed off to the pub. It’s very rude.’

Someone else said: ‘I’d find that rude. Two men dumping their kids on other parents and sloping off, when the host had even provided drinks for them. I’d think of those men as selfish cheeky f***ers after that.’

She explained that her friend threw a party at a play centre for her child but invited adults as well and provided alcoholic drinks and a ‘catered spread’

Some people did think the dads leaving the party was rude with others claiming they were ‘selfish

While a fourth wrote: ‘Of course it’s rude – but there is a wealth of men who believe that anything child-related is nothing to do with them and Mum can deal with it.

‘I would never assume a dad’s attendance unless I was liasing with the father directly. I’d double check that they were coming and actually attending at point of invite.

‘I’m sure people will come at me saying, “Not my Nigel” – but a large percentage of blokes would definitely use this an as an excuse for a bit of “me time”.’

However, some thought it was perfectly normal for parents to drop their children off at a party and leave. 

One person said: ‘If the invite was to my child for a kid’s party then I would just drop and go, as staying is optional and parents rarely stay unless children are very young.’

While some thought it was perfectly normal for parents to drop their children off at a party and leave. Others wondered why alcohol was even served at a children’s birthday party in the first place

Another said: ‘Its common here. Parties are dump and run or stay and mingle. No obligation on parents to do either it’s entirely up to them. Two dads sloping off to a different pub wouldn’t even be noticed.’

While a third wrote: ‘No it isn’t rude. It was a kid’s party and parents are just there to transport. If the child is an age where they didn’t need actual individual supervision then its fine to drop and run. Obviously you always let the host know that you aren’t staying, and leave a phone number just in case.’ 

Others wondered why alcohol was even served at a children’s birthday party in the first place.

One person said: ‘I would be keen for the dad to have set a trend and all those interested in being under the influence of alcohol to follow him down the pub.

‘That way, children will be free to just enjoy being children’s rather than being surrounded by adults being drunk.’

Another said: ‘Perhaps they just thought that drinking booze would be more appropriate in a pub than in a children’s play centre.’