I’m not throwing my three-year-old a birthday party – and I think all parents who host them for kids under seven are selfish
- Dad claims there’s ‘no point’ hosting birthday party for toddlers
- He says it’s a ‘selfish’ act as the child ‘won’t remember’ the celebration
A dad has been criticised for saying it’s ‘selfish’ and ‘pointless’ for parents to host birthday parties for their young kids who ‘wont remember’ the celebration.
The father, from the U.S., said his partner wanted to throw a big party for their son’s birthday, but he was against it.
In previous years he convinced her to only host a small get-together with close family and friends.
Posting on Reddit, the father asked ‘am I the a**hole?’ for not wanting to host a birthday party for his son.
‘My girlfriend liked to host parties and when [our son] reached his first birthday, she wanted to have a big birthday party, but I managed to convince her to downsize to just us, our parents and siblings. Little guy was still too young,’ the man wrote.
A father from the U.S. said his partner wanted to throw a big party for their son’s birthday, but he was against it (stock image)
‘The next year she again talked about her plans to have a big party for our two-year-old, but I told her it would be close family, a cake and a Happy Birthday song.
‘This year she told me about her plans and again I told her to just do something small. But this time she was frustrated and told me to let her do something bigger for our son for once.’
The dad went on to say it’s ‘ridiculous to have big parties for toddlers’ as they ‘will not remember anything’.
He said he doesn’t remember his second birthday where his parents threw him a Toy Story-themed party.
‘She said it doesn’t matter because there will be lots of people taking pictures and he can just see them when he gets older,’ the dad continued.
‘She still doesn’t understand my point of view. It’s not like he won’t ever have a birthday party. We should just wait until he’s six or seven, you know, when he can actually remember.’
The conversation left his girlfriend fuming and she started planning a party regardless.
The man’s own mother also accused him of ‘depriving’ his son of a childhood.
‘My mum says I should just do what my girlfriend says because dad’s word is not that important and I should know my place as a father. I feel like I’m going crazy over this. Am I the a******?’ he said.
He later said birthday parties for babies and young children are ‘an excuse for adults to have a party at the expense of the toddler who wont remember it.’
Hundreds flooded the comments with responses scolding the father.
One Redditor attracted more than 4,700 likes with their comment.
‘So you shouldn’t do anything fun with your kids until they’re old enough to remember? Why bring them to the park? Why read them books? Why watch movies with them? Why do anything fun at all until they can have a memory of it? Do you see how stupid that sounds?’ the person asked.
Another commented: ‘Why is it always your way, and never hers? But on larger issue, you really need to examine why you think that your child’s experiences don’t matter unless he can remember them. He still experiences those moments.’
‘You got your way for two years – if she likes planning events like these, you should not take it away from her. Some day you might regret not having those cute pictures to share,’ a third said.
Another wrote: ‘How we interact with our children now shapes them. We show them love, cuddle them, play with them, also discipline them and show them boundaries and we should celebrate them.’
‘My daughter loved her third birthday party. I don’t know if she’ll remember it or not, but I know it made her happy and special, and why shouldn’t she?!’ one mum wrote.
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