Olympic star Raygun has opened up on the mental turmoil she has endured since going viral for her breakdancing performances in Paris.
The 37-year-old shot to fame following her iconic routine during last summer’s Games, when she scored a total of 0.0 points.
Raygun, whose real name is Rachael Gunn, became Australia’s first ever female breakdancing competitor at the Olympics. But the university lecturer was subjected to brutal trolling over her infamous performance, which saw her hop like a kangaroo.
Gunn revealed the ‘toll’ her Olympic experience has taken over recent months, admitting her anxiety has been ‘really bad’.
‘People really have tried to shame me,’ she said. But Raygun vowed not to let her ‘haters’ win.
Olympic star Raygun has opened up on the mental turmoil she has endured since going viral
The Australian Olympics star was pictured on the cover of Stellar magazine this week
‘It’s been so hard to process,’ she told Stellar. ‘My whole world has changed. My identity has changed. My relationships have changed, for better or for worse.
‘It’s in times like these that you find out who your real friends are, unfortunately. And because things are still changing, it’s just impossible to wrap your head around. It’s hard to predict what it’s going to be like when I leave the house.’
She added: ‘I think the haters want me to be locked away in a room, ashamed and quiet.
‘Every time I leave the house, go out for dinner, go to the shops or do a fashion shoot and pop my head back up, it’s saying: “No, you did not bring me down. You did not succeed. I still stand by what I did. It’s OK to be different. It’s OK to be yourself. You don’t have the power you think you do.”‘
Gunn revealed why she focused on reading and ‘spring cleaning’ before speaking out. She also outlined how the reaction to her performance has impacted her mental health.
‘There was so much hate and emotion that I needed to wait for everyone to calm down a bit,’ Gunn told Stellar.
The Aussie dancer received plenty of backlash for her performance at the Paris Olympics
‘This is a process that I’m working through, trying to resist that shame,’ Raygun admitted
‘This is a process that I’m working through, trying to resist that shame. I’m working through mental health stuff – seeing my psychologist, doing exercise when I don’t feel like it, doing breathing exercises.
‘(Mental health) is now something that I have to look after – it’s being exhausted. It’s definitely taken a toll.’
She added: ‘It’s still a process because I’m having to (prioritize) my own health. I speak to my family when I can, but it’s hard for me to know the toll it’s taken on them because I think that will take a toll on me.’
The Australian does not believe the reaction would have been so fierce if she was a man. ‘I would have very quickly been given the (maverick) title and people would have rallied behind me a lot more,’ she insisted.
But, despite all the mockery, the 37-year-old said she stays positive by keeping a collection of funny photos and clips.
‘My friends were all sending them to me and I loved it,’ she added. ‘I loved the people laughing with me because, yeah, I was doing some wacky stuff. I know that.’
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