Nearly two years after MasterChef Australia judge Jock Zonfrillo’s shock death, his widow Lauren Zonfrillo has shared the emotional contents of his final journal entry.

Lauren opened up for the first time about the moment she learned the Scottish-born chef, 46, had died alone in a Melbourne hotel room on April 30, 2023.

The celebrity cook, who rose to national fame alongside Melissa Leong and Andy Allen on MasterChef, passed away during the promo tour for the show’s new season. His cause of death has never been made public.

In a raw and tearful interview on Spotlight with Seven’s Liz Hayes, Lauren revealed the harrowing moment police contacted her in Italy – where she had recently moved with their two children, Alfie and Isla – and delivered the devastating news.

‘I was hysterical,’ Lauren recalled, her voice trembling.

After trying and failing to reach Jock, she called his hotel and requested a welfare check.

Nearly two years after MasterChef Australia judge Jock Zonfrillo's shock death, his widow Lauren Zonfrilloa has shared the emotional contents of his final journal entry

Nearly two years after MasterChef Australia judge Jock Zonfrillo’s shock death, his widow Lauren Zonfrilloa has shared the emotional contents of his final journal entry

When police phoned back to inform her that a ‘deceased male’ had been located in his room, her world shattered.

Flying home to Australia, Lauren later viewed Jock’s body, describing the surreal moment where it felt like he was still with her.

‘He was still there. I could smell his aftershave and hair product. It looked like he was just sleeping,’ she said through tears.

‘I told him that it’ll be okay, that I’ve got this. That I will make sure the kids live big lives. And that, no matter what, we would be a family.’

But perhaps the most emotional revelation came from a journal Lauren discovered after Jock’s passing – a heartfelt collection of thoughts he had written in the lead-up to his death.

In one entry, Jock reflected on his deep love for his young family.

‘He wrote about how happy he was that we were finding our feet… how excited he was about raising these little Aussie-Italian-Scottish children,’ Lauren shared.

‘He always did the voices when putting the kids to bed… and he wrote about missing those things, and how he looked forward to getting to Italy where we were.’

In a raw and tearful interview on Spotlight with Seven's Liz Hayes, Lauren revealed the harrowing moment police contacted her in Italy

 In a raw and tearful interview on Spotlight with Seven’s Liz Hayes, Lauren revealed the harrowing moment police contacted her in Italy

One passage in particular continues to comfort Lauren.

‘He wrote… “Lauren didn’t see herself, but I think she’s just doing so much. She’s so capable and I’m really proud she can do those hard things,”‘ she revealed.

‘That meant a lot to me. It was like this message of encouragement. Like, you’ve got this, Lauren.’

Lauren admitted she often questioned how she would go on without him.

‘I do feel broken now. I lost the person I love that much.’

Since his death, there has been speculation surrounding what caused the chef’s sudden passing, with some pointing to Zonfrillo’s past struggles with addiction and reports he may have been privately battling bowel cancer.

But Lauren pushed back on the narrative that his ‘demons’ had returned.

She did not disclose a cause of death but confirmed she was told by those who found him that he appeared to have died peacefully in bed.

But perhaps the most emotional revelation came from a journal Lauren discovered after Jock's passing – a heartfelt collection of thoughts he had written in the lead-up to his death

But perhaps the most emotional revelation came from a journal Lauren discovered after Jock’s passing – a heartfelt collection of thoughts he had written in the lead-up to his death 

At the time of his passing, Jock’s family released a heartbreaking statement, writing: ‘With completely shattered hearts and without knowing how we can possibly move through life without him, we are devastated to share that Jock passed away… So many words can describe him, so many stories can be told, but at this time we’re too overwhelmed to put them into words.’

Jock Zonfrillo is survived by Lauren and their two children, who continue to carry forward his legacy – with Lauren vowing to raise them in the same spirit of love and adventure their father cherished so deeply.

A fortnight after Zonfrillo’s death his wife led about 200 mourners who gathered for a funeral at Macquarie Park Cemetery and Crematorium at North Ryde on May 13.

Among those who attended the service were celebrity chefs George Calombaris, Matt Moran, Colin Fassnidge, Manu Feildel and Shannon Bennett as well as Zonfrillo’s co-stars Allen and Melissa Leong.

Lauren was among the pallbearers and delivered a eulogy before Zonfrillo’s friend and fellow Scotsman, Jimmy Barnes, sang Amazing Grace with his daughter Mahalia.

Zonfrillo wrote in his 2021 memoir Last Shot about battling a heroin addiction from his teenage years working as a chef in Glasgow.

After moving to north-west England he sold cocaine and other drugs to supplement his wages, was eventually sacked and at 17 made his way to London.

Zonfrillo wrote that he turned up at Marco Pierre White’s renowned restaurant at the Hyde Park Hotel in 1994 and the famed chef became a mentor who would shape his life.

He moved to Australia aged 20 in 1996 and got a job at Forty One restaurant in Sydney where he was using cocaine, pills, LSD and cannabis.

Zonfrillo joined the MasterChef Australia judging panel in 2020 with food critic Leong and restaurateur Allen after original judges Calombaris, Gary Mehigan and Matt Preston left

Zonfrillo joined the MasterChef Australia judging panel in 2020 with food critic Leong and restaurateur Allen after original judges Calombaris, Gary Mehigan and Matt Preston left

According to his book, Zonfrillo kept a raging heroin habit hidden from everyone before going back to the UK in 1997 when his visa ran out.

He wrote of taking his last hit of heroin in the toilets at Heathrow airport before returning to Australia in early 2000.

Zonfrillo opened his own restaurants, Orana and Bistro Blackwood, in Adelaide in 2013. He added a third, Nonna Mallozzi, in 2018.

The latter lasted six months, Bistro Blackwood closed in late 2019 and Orana in March 2020.

Zonfrillo joined the MasterChef Australia judging panel in 2020 with food critic Leong and restaurateur Allen after original judges Calombaris, Gary Mehigan and Matt Preston left.

Till Death Do Us Part, published by Penguin Books Australia, will be released on May 6.

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