As if Theresa May did not have enough to deal with during her motorway pile-up of a speech, she had to endure the gasps of horror and laughter coming from broadcasters based behind her podium.
When the ‘f’ fell off the slogan behind her, a collective shout of ‘****’ went up from the pit (clue: it begins with the same letter) – and a Tory goon had to be dispatched to silence them.
When the ‘f’ fell off the slogan behind her, a collective shout of ‘****’ went up from the pit (clue: it begins with the same letter) – and a Tory goon had to be dispatched to silence them
Mrs May was not the only croaky person in Manchester rescued by the party’s own ‘Dr Kildare’ Philip Hammond.
When he heard Dog spluttering like a strangled mongrel at a drinks bash the previous evening, he produced a strip of the same honey and lemon lozenges he gave to the PM.
Soldier Tom… the man to bash Bozza
If Theresa May wants to punish rebel Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson, she could do worse than sack his deputy Sir Alan Duncan for saying a working-class ‘tantrum’ caused Brexit and replace him with ex-Army officer and brainbox Tom Tugendhat, left, seen as a future PM.
‘He is cleverer than Boris and despises him even more than Duncan – and Boris knows it,’ said Dog’s mole.
Scottish Tory leader Ruth Davidson – regarded by many as the party’s most likely saviour – is a canny wee devil.
When shown a draft of the Election manifesto containing the disastrous ‘dementia tax’, she rang No 10 to say that she wouldn’t be adopting it for reasons of ‘devolution’.
‘What she meant was it was clearly a ridiculous idea and she wanted nothing to do with it,’ Dog is told.
Mrs May’s deputy Damian Green was not impressed with the Manchester restaurant scene.
After taking his staff to one ‘top end’ eaterie, he complained to Dog: ‘It was so bad, we even had to send the water back’.
Heath’s silent supper
It doesn’t need a police inquiry to prove Sir Edward Heath was famously rude.
A Tory MP recalls how, when the former PM sat in stony silence as guest of honour during a banquet, a note was passed to him gently suggesting he strike up conversation with the host sitting next to him.
Heath grunted: ‘I’ve already said “good evening.” ’
It doesn’t need a police inquiry to prove Sir Edward Heath was famously rude
Fed-up Conservative donors revealed how cocksure International Trade Secretary Liam Fox bragged at a private meeting at London’s Reform Club in May: ‘Give us your money and I guarantee we will blow away Labour and reduce them to 100 MPs.’ The dopey donors duly coughed up – and Labour won 262 seats.
Tory chairman Sir Patrick McLoughlin is so rattled by a revolt by dissatisfied donors, he is offering a ‘free upgrade’ for members of the party’s £25,000-a-year ‘Treasurers Group’ to join the £50,000 a year ‘Leaders Group’ – which promises regular cocktail parties with Theresa May – without paying an extra sou. Worryingly, there are still no takers.