Controversial mummy blogger Constance Hall has responded after a stylist at a photoshoot told her she was ‘lucky’ her husband is still attracted to her because of her weight.
The 38-year-old mother, who lives with her seven children in Western Australia, spoke candidly on Facebook on Wednesday about the frustrating experience with the so-called professional.
‘Over the years I’ve read so many posts from men who claim to “Still find their wives attractive, even after everything their bodies have been through,”‘ she explained.
‘And more often then not, these posts annoy me. The hidden messages imply that we should show gratitude towards anybody who still finds us wrinkly old beasts attractive.
‘Once on a photoshoot with my doting husband who helps me do the zip of my shaper up because I don’t want anyone else to witness the struggle while I hold my breath and suck in someone said to me “You’re lucky, your husband is still so attracted to you.”‘
The 38-year-old mother, who lives with her seven children in Western Australia , spoke candidly on Facebook on Wednesday about the frustrating experience with the so-called professional
The jarring words gave Constance time to reflect on her relationship with her husband Denim Cooke, who she married in 2018.
‘The fact that my husband finds me attractive doesn’t make me lucky, it makes him lucky. The only thing that makes me lucky is the fact that I find myself attractive,’ she said.
‘In a world that glorifies the heroic men who “still” find us attractive, after kids and weight gain and ageing. I am lucky.
‘Lucky to still look in the mirror and genuinely think “You wouldn’t kick her out of bed if she farted” most days. And for that I am grateful.’
Last month Constance confirmed that she was living apart from Denim after he almost died falling off a motorbike in 2020.
The 38-year-old mother, who lives with her seven children in Western Australia, spoke candidly on Instagram on Wednesday about the state of her marriage after innumerable Covid lockdowns and a husband who is recovering from serious trauma
‘He just completely checked out of life after the accident,’ she said.
Denim, who recently avoided a stint in jail despite driving with ice in his system and having an unrestrained child in his car, was involved in a horror motorbike crash in August, 2020.
The 46-year-old was airlifted to a trauma ward at Royal Perth Hospital suffering seven broken ribs, punctured lungs, multiple infections and a brain injury after skidding off his bike.
‘I think when he woke up from the accident, I was very excited. And there was this sort of false hope,’ Constance said.
‘I spoke to the doctors, and they said Denim doesn’t have motivation anymore. The frontal lobe damage has taken any of that away that he might have had before.
‘His psychiatrist said really recently, and it was really clever, ‘He loves you. He loves his family. He needs to work for you rather than just getting you and all the things you do and provide… and that’s not gonna happen unless he’s removed from the family home.”
The couple began to look into an assisted care facility to get a few nights away from each other and heal but Constance was reminded constantly that he was ‘becoming a shell of a man’.
The couple began to look into an assisted care facility to get a few nights away from each other and heal but Constance was reminded constantly that he was ‘becoming a shell of a man’
They were fighting and the mother-of-seven could see their relations were spiralling.
So Denim went to stay with his best friend who lives in Esperance, a 10 hour drive away from Constance’s home in Margaret River.
‘I spoke to him the next day, and there was just this light in his face… like he was just his old self again. He was clear. He was awake and alive and around lovely people,’ she said.
Her empathy, compassion and desire soon returned and Constance thanks her husband’s psychiatrist for stepping in when he did to ‘help them’.
Final post? This photo of Constance, Denim and their son Raja shared on July 23 is the last time he appeared on his wife’s Instagram account
‘So anyway, he’s still in Esperance, obviously. But he’ll come back when we figure out something better. And in the meantime, no one ever said it was going to be easy,’ she said.
Opening up about his ordeal on his personal blog, The Cooke Trinity, Denim said doctors were mostly worried about the brain injury he had sustained, because it could lead to irreversible damage down the track.
‘There was a time where the hope of me ever being the man I am today, able to communicate like I do and maintain these relationships was minimal,’ he said.
Denim said his wife Constance was repeatedly warned that it would be a ‘miracle’ for him to make a full recovery, but the doting dad was mostly in a coma ‘dreaming’ while she stood by his side.
‘I credit her influence on my fragile state to loving me back to myself. It took a few weeks and an amazing amount of her love, compassion and patience on all fronts,’ he said.
Constance (pictured with Denim) has always been candid about their marital struggles
‘I am only now understanding the relentless hard, repetitive, heartbreaking and exhausting work that was involved in bringing me back.’
He described how his personality has changed post-accident and that he is a ‘calmer’ and more ‘patient’ version of himself.
‘My mind is overcoming its trauma and calculating the experience in a positive way. Internally I recognise that I’m less agitated by many things and have a larger sense of grateful appreciation for the most simple things. I’m even easier to get along with,’ he said.
In an ode to his wife, Denim called her his ‘everything’ and said he would try to be a better father to their children and a better husband because ‘her unwavering love saved me’.
He said he feels grateful to have escaped any lasting disabilities and will only need to manage chronic pain as a result of the fall, something he considers getting off lightly.
Constance and Denim (pictured together) tied the knot in a bohemian forest ceremony at Karriview Lodge near Margaret River, WA, in January 2018 following a whirlwind romance
Constance and Denim announced their engagement in June 2017, two months after she split from her first husband of six years, Bill Mahon.
In October 2017 the couple announced they were expecting their first child together, a son named Raja.
The pair tied the knot in a bohemian forest ceremony at Karriview Lodge near Margaret River, Western Australia, in January 2018 following a whirlwind romance.
Their blended brood consists of Constance’s four children, Billie-Violet, Arlo Love, and twins Rumi and Snow from her previous marriage, and Denim’s two sons Zeyke and Sunny.