DJ Tigerlily reveals the devastating reality behind idyllic holiday

One of Australia’s most prominent DJs and music producers has opened up on the devastating moment she realised she had lost her unborn child. 

Dara Hayes, who is better known by her stage name DJ Tigerlily, was eight weeks pregnant while on holidays at Airlie Beach in July with her husband Scott Lawson when tragedy struck.

Photos from the tropical getaway showed the newlyweds looking relaxed and happy on sun soaked beaches in Queensland’s Whitsunday region.

But their smiling faces were masks hiding the truth – feelings of ‘devastation, shame and disbelief’ were bubbling below the surface.

The 30-year-old Sydney music producer, who is now five and half months into her second pregnancy, told FEMAIL she woke up the morning she lost her baby brimming with excitement.

Dara had already organised this yacht for a 5-day trip when she lost the baby – she and Scott were going to tell their friends on the boat – but had a much sadder announcement

‘I had chartered a yacht to take us and some our closest friends around the Whitsundays [off the Queensland coast] for five days,’ she said.

‘I was going to tell them all the happy news when we got on board. But the universe had different ideas.’

Dara and Scott spent the day at Proserpine hospital instead, where doctors confirmed she had miscarried. 

‘We were crushed. And it is stupid but I also felt so much shame, like I had let people down, let myself down,’ she said.

The star, who is now five months pregnant and ‘over half way’ had never even thought about miscarriage before she had one 

The couple, who were married in a lavish ceremony in Sydney’s Duffy Forest on March 5, had always thought they would delay having children.

‘But then we heard so many stories of people struggling to become pregnant and thought we would start trying just in case,’ she said. 

‘We were so lucky and got pregnant on the first try, we were so excited.’

Dara told close family and friends as she saw them, and looking back is glad she did, because they were the people she needed when everything fell apart.

The bubbly 30-year-old who is pictured at this year’s ARIAS was due to tell a group of friends the happy news about her pregnancy when she lost the baby 

‘We had so much love and support when it happened. We actually ended up going on the boat with our friends later and it really helped during a tough time.’

A month after losing their baby the couple decided to try again.

‘We were really lucky again, and became pregnant on the first try,’ she said.

And again they told their closest friends and family.

‘People were worried, some said we should wait to try again. But Scott and I sat down and had that conversation and decided we didn’t want to.

‘I didn’t even think it would be possible to get pregnant again so quickly.

She and her husband, pictured together on that holiday, spent the day in Proserpine hospital where doctors confirmed they had lost the baby

The next month they ‘tried again’ resulting in their current pregnancy 

‘Being pregnant for 10 months is a long time, add another few months to that and… I am happy we made that choice,’ she said. 

Dara was shocked to learn that one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage.

‘It wasn’t even on our radar but it is so common, my doctor said people can have four in a row before doctors investigate why – because one, two, three, is all considered common. I think I would want to find a reason after two,’ she added.

She waited until the 15-week mark to tell her fans she was expecting, because she wanted to have results from the genetic tests and big scans before the major announcement.

Prior to that she had announced her pregnancy at intimate events and said it was important to her, especially as she wasn’t feeling her best.

The popular DJ said she was feeling very tired for the first 15 weeks, completely zapped of her energy and personality – but is feeling amazing now 

‘I felt like a zombie, like my personality had been zapped.

‘My cup was completely empty, I felt drained and like I had nothing to give those around me, or even myself,’ she said.

Being a vegan she is no stranger to feeling fatigue as a result of low iron – but this was 10 times worse.

‘Then at 15 weeks I started feeling a bit better, then really good, I am glad that what they say about the second trimester seems to be true for me, it is easier,’ she said. 

‘I do get anxiety every time I hop into bed though, which is strange because I have never had that before.’

The internationally acclaimed DJ has also had a few months to dream about what her life and career might look like with a mini-me in toe.

She wants to talk about miscarriage because she didn’t realise how common it was until she had one and people told her their own stories

‘I keep whispering to my stomach, telling baby it will like sleeping and going on planes,’ she said.

She plans to play at festivals throughout her pregnancy, slowing down just before the baby’s due date in late April.

‘At the moment I play at least 10 gigs a month, but that will change when I have the baby. I will do more corporate stuff, see how baby goes and then slowly start up gigs again, probably aiming for four a month at first,’ she said.

Dara has started to broaden her horizons when it comes to work – in anticipation of a life following slightly different creative projects.

The mum-to-be has wasted no time dreaming about what kind of life she will have once baby arrives

‘I created a garden scape for Amazon using noises from their most popular gardening products alongside noises of Australian birds.

‘It was a really cool project, and I didn’t think I would be using my musical talent to do something like that, but absolutely loved it,’ she said. 

The project was done in collaboration with The Block’s Kirsty and Jesse and each tool was voted by Aussies as the most nostalgic sounds they hear in the backyard to bring on those summer vibes.

Exciting commercial projects, which can also be done from a studio at home, will keep the star busy until she is ready to intensify her workload. 

She is pictured here working on the Amazon project – and says she is keen to do more work for corporates after giving birth, until she is ready to tour again

Her return to normal touring will all be dependent on how she is feeling after having her baby, and how well the family is doing as a unit.

But she did give glimpse of the dream.

Her soaring through the sky with a very well behaved, screen-free, outdoors loving baby and nanny in toe.

‘My mum just rolls her eyes at me,’ she laughed.

The 30-year-old and her husband are even considering a Eurotrip in July.

Dara has decided to wait until baby is born to find out the gender – adding it will be a nice delivery day surprise 

Dara and Scott aren’t going to have a gender reveal or baby shower before their child is born and haven’t even found out if bub is a boy or girl for themselves.

‘I am going to get a lot of hate for this but I don’t like the idea of gender reveals of baby showers – it just isn’t me – I do have a few fun maternity shoots planned for January and February though.

‘Scott would love to find out, but my aunt was a midwife and told me stories about the magic of finding out after giving birth.

‘It’s like another little present on top,’ she said.

Her first feeling was that it is a girl, but when she saw the first ultrasound she decided it was a boy.

Now she has no idea but ‘when pressed would say a girl’.