They say friendships can last a lifetime.
But what do you do if you’re embroiled in a toxic friendship?
Toxic friends don’t seem to share your joy when you have good news or they leave you feeling utterly drained with their negativity.
And most of the time, they can cause more issues than benefits.
Here, Sydney’s relationship expert Dr Nikki Goldstein revealed the warning signs of a toxic friendship – and when it’s the right time to cut them out of your life for good.
Toxic friends don’t seem to share your joy when you have good news or they leave you feeling utterly drained with their negativity (stock image)
Sydney’s relationship expert Dr Nikki Goldstein (pictured) revealed the warning signs of a toxic friendship – and when it’s the right time to cut them out of your life for good
Speaking to the Today show, Dr Goldstein likened toxic friendships to romantic relationships – and revealed when to consider cutting ties.
‘When we have that person who we feel is just as toxic, I feel like it’s similar to dating. Let’s have a look at “bread crumbing” and “ghosting”,’ she said.
‘If it’s one-sided and you’re putting in all the effort and they’re not calling you to catch up, only calling you when they want something or when there’s drama in their life, that’s where you do need to consider.’
She explained how a toxic person would often make you feel ‘terrible more times than you feel good’ every time you have an encounter.
She said, ask yourself: ‘Do I put the work into that friendship or are there other people in my life where I can invest in that time and effort – and it’s appreciated and rewarded?’
Dr Goldstein suggested taking a step back to see how you truly feel about the person
Dr Goldstein suggested taking a step back to see how you truly feel about the person.
‘If you feel like you miss them once you’ve stepped back, and you feel like this is a relationship you want to work on, that’s a really good point where you might be able to bring up things that have happened and say to them: “I feel like this friendship is one sided”.
‘But if you don’t miss them, that’s where it really says to you “maybe that is the person you should be letting go”.’
She explained people often remain friends because of the ‘guilt’ they may feel.
‘It comes down to guilt, we’re taught about this sisterhood that we should support each other, that we should be friends,’ Dr Goldstein said.
‘So I kind of find that we hang in there. We might have something where somebody is making us feel yuck about ourselves or something that’s equally feels as violating.
‘But yet we want to work on that friendship and we want to stay there because giving up on the friendship, we feel guilty about potentially letting somebody down.’
Journalist Dilvin Yasa (pictured) weighed in on the topic, saying she realised it was time to end her 17-year friendship after her friend had a negative impact on her life
Journalist Dilvin Yasa weighed in on the topic, saying she realised it was time to end her 17-year friendship after her friend had a negative impact on her life.
‘When you see their name come up on your phone, and instead of being excited about speaking to your friend, you feel this dread in your heart,’ she said.
‘Towards the end, we drifted, I had this horrible feeling whenever we tried to get together, I was always finding ways to cancel on her.
‘I felt so guilty because we had such a long friendship, but it was never a good feeling, I never walked away feeling great about having spent time with her.’