Fresh pain for the parents of tragic 12-year-old schoolgirl who committed suicide – as they reveal the ‘cold reception’ they were given

The grieving father of a 12-year-old girl who took her own life claims his daughter’s school principal showed ‘no empathy’ in a meeting after her death.  

Charlotte O’Brien, a Year 7 student at Santa Sabina College at Strathfield in Sydney’s inner-west, took her own life on September 9.  

Charlotte’s parents, Matthew and Kelly, revealed their daughter was subjected to relentless bullying over a two-year period which drove her into helpless despair. 

Her parents slammed the school for ‘sweeping under the carpet’ the issue of bullying – a claim the school vehemently denies. 

Mr O’Brien told 2GB host Ben Fordham on Tuesday it took weeks to organise a meeting with the school’s principal Paulina Skerma. 

He explained Ms Skerma only reached out to he and his wife after she heard him on Fordham’s breakfast show in the days leading up to Charlotte’s funeral. 

On the night of the funeral, Mr O’Brien emailed the principal and was told she was unable to meet as the school would be closed for a few weeks. 

When a meeting was finally set, Mr O’Brien said he and his wife held a ‘glimmer of hope’ that the principal had a chance to think about their daughter’s tragic death and reflect on the hurtful comments she had made to the media. 

Charlotte O’Brien (pictured), a Year 7 student at Santa Sabina College at Strathfield in Sydney ‘s inner-west, took her own life on September 9

Charlotte's parents, Matthew and Kelly, revealed their daughter was subjected to relentless bullying over a two-year period which drove her into helpless despair

Charlotte’s parents, Matthew and Kelly, revealed their daughter was subjected to relentless bullying over a two-year period which drove her into helpless despair

However, their hope for any positive change was shattered the moment they arrived at the school.  

‘That glimmer of hope that anything positive to come from that meeting was squashed the moment we arrived,’ Mr O’Brien said. 

‘The gates of the school were closed. We weren’t even met at the school gates. We did not know where to go.’

Tuesday, October 29, marked 50 days since Charlotte took her own life. 

Mr O’Brien choked back tears as he recalled walking through the school full of children their daughter’s age. 

‘We had to navigate ourselves across the school grounds, surrounded by other girls in their school uniform, knowing that we will never see our daughter again. That was incredibly hard for us,’ he said.

‘We arrived there and met with the principal. When I shared the feedback, she wasn’t interested in receiving that. The feedback was interrupted. It was discounted. It was disagreed with.

‘I sat across the room from a lady (the principal) that showed myself and the rest of the family no emotion or empathy at all.’

When asked if the principal made any sort of apology for the death of their daughter, Mr O’Brien said ‘there was no accountability at all’.

‘The questions we wanted answered were simply not answered at all. We were left to show ourselves out of the school ground,’ he said.

‘The last image that I will have of that school was as I looked behind me, Kelly was carrying some items of Charlotte’s and watching her squeeze herself and that box through those closed gates was one of the hardest things that I’ve seen.

‘Kelly got in the car and that was the worst I had seen her since the funeral. She said to me “I felt my daughter’s life did not matter”.’

A memorial for Charlotte outside the school was removed on Monday, further fuelling her parents’ grief.

Charlotte's parents claim the school refused to take accountability for Charlotte's bullying after their meeting with her former principal, Paulina Skerma (pictured)

Charlotte’s parents claim the school refused to take accountability for Charlotte’s bullying after their meeting with her former principal, Paulina Skerma (pictured)

‘I now have to turn my attention to those who want to do better. There are some schools and institutions that are really taking this seriously and are making positive changes,’ Mr O’Brien said.

‘I need to turn my attention to them and encourage them to continue on this journey.

‘…We were able to meet with the senior policy advisory for the NSW government, we were able to meet with Chris Minns himself and his office, we were able to have a conversation with the prime minister of this country on these important topics. 

‘All before we were afforded an opportunity to meet with the principal of the school.’

The grieving father described the education system’s response to bullying as ‘an issue across the board’. 

‘This is not an isolated issue to one school. It is one of the things that we are advocating for, and that is a review of the anti-bullying policies across schools,’ he said.

‘We need a review of these policies, it needs to be universal and it needs to be one of no tolerance. When it is raised the first time it needs to be dealt with immediately and swiftly.’  

A few weeks after their daughter’s death, Mr and Mrs O’Brien told 2GB that Charlotte had specifically blamed bullying for her suicide.

‘She wrote a goodbye note specifically mentioning the bullying she received at the school,’ they said.

‘She said life was too difficult for her to continue.

‘When the most recent case of bullying was raised, the school simply said it was investigated and the girls denied it. That’s it. Case closed. Move on.

‘Well my beautiful daughter’s life won’t move on and I’ll never get to say goodbye.

‘These issues cannot be swept under the carpet. I will not let my daughter’s memory be swept under the carpet either.

‘How many more children need to lose their lives before they get it? How many parents need to feel the pain of never being able to pick up their child from school again before they get it?

‘We’re broken forever.’

In an earlier statement to Daily Mail Australia, Santa Sabina College addressed the allegations it failed to intervene in Charlotte’s bullying.

A memorial for Charlotte (pictured) outside the school was removed on Monday, further fuelling her parents' grief

A memorial for Charlotte (pictured) outside the school was removed on Monday, further fuelling her parents’ grief

‘A number of claims are being made about the circumstances that led to her (Charlotte’s) death – these are new claims to the College and are not consistent with our records,’ the statement said.

‘In the outpouring of grief as everyone rightly questions how this could have happened, the College asks the media to take immense care in reporting so that further issues are not created for other vulnerable young people in our community and beyond.

‘The main priority of the College at the moment is to support and care for our students, their families and our staff as well as support for this grieving family.’ 

Daily Mail Australia has contacted the school and Ms Skerma for further comment. 

Help is available at LIFELINE AUSTRALIA 13 11 14 BEYOND BLUE 1300 22 46 36 

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