The Duggars are notorious not only for how many kids they’ve had (19 and counting) – but also for the incredibly strict religious rules those children were raised under, with restrictions dictating everything from the clothes they can wear to the foods and drinks they can consume.
Jim Bob, 57, and Michelle, 56, have agreed to raise their children under strict guidelines in regards to their appearance, social activities, religion and dating lives.
While some rules are gender neutral like no tattoos or body piercings, no playingto music that encourages dancing and that they must be homeschooled and homeschool their kids, others are specfically geared toward their daughters.
They aren’t allowed to wear pants or can’t use birth control and have been raised to serve their husbands and encouraged not to get a job of their own.
One of the biggest rules the Duggars enforce is that they weren’t allowed to be intimate in any way before marriage. The rule not only includes abstinance but avoiding kissing or hugging for longer than three seconds.
The Duggars are notorious for not only how many kids they’ve had (19 and counting) but the amount of rules they’ve set for their children
Since becoming adults, the Duggar siblings have started to pick which of their parents’ rules to keep following and which to toss out
They also weren’t allowed to date at all. Instead of dating, their children enter courtships.
‘Courtship is really waiting for the one God has for you and praying through the whole process,’ Jim Duggar said of their dating policies on Today.
Michelle chimed in: ‘It’s really examining the person and considering, “Would this be the guy I want to be the father of my kids?’
The rule of courtships even has rules within it including mandatory chaperones on each date and Jim Bob and Michelle having to read and be involved with every text chain.
Since becoming adults, the Duggar siblings have started to pick which of their parents’ rules to keep following and which to toss out.
While they have continued to stick to their faith, raise plentiful families and avoid divorce at all costs, it may surprise some fans to learn how many rules the Duggar siblings have broken since moving out of their parents’ household.
The Duggar daughters have rebelled by wearing pants, cutting and dying their hair and getting piercings
From dresses to pants: Jinger and Joy-anna Duggar have both decided to wear pants after stating they didn’t want to wear ‘clothes that too tight and draw attention to the wrong places’
Dress code is a big part of the Duggar family rules. Jim Bob and Michelle insisted that their daughters not only refrain from wearing pants but any dresses or skirts that weren’t full-length.
As they grew up, the girls were more than willing to abide by their parents’ dress code that promoted modesty and deterred men from being tempted by them.
In their 2014 memoir, Growing Up Duggar, authors Jill, Jinger, Jessa, and Jana Duggar explain the mindset behind their family’s dress code.
‘It’s okay to enhance or accent whatever beauty God has given us, but we try to be careful not to wear clothes that are too tight and draw attention to the wrong places,’ they wrote.
‘But this does not mean we go out dressing frumpy or trying to look formless. Clothing can be cute, trendy, and stylish, and still entirely modest.’
Since then, the women have reevaluated their stance on attire and almost all of the daughters – and even Michelle – have decided it’s acceptable to wear pants now.
Most recently, the family’s matriarch, Michelle Duggars was spotted in a family snap wearing tight leggings on Thursday.
This is surprising considering Michelle seemed to be the biggest enforcer of this rule.
‘My mom had always dressed us girls in skirts and dresses, a standard that was taken from Deuteronomy 22:5, which says, “A woman shall not wear a man’s garment,”‘ she wrote in her memoir.
Michelle Duggar surprisingly wore leggins in a family picture
Short shorts! Jinger shocked fans by wearing shorts on Tuesday
Jana especially shocked fans when she not only wore shorts but a tank top as well during a boat outing with her brother John David Duggar and his wife Abbie
However, like her mother, Jinger has also changed her ways and has embraced wearing pants.
It turns out that her sister Jessa Duggar’s in-laws, the Seewalds, inspired her to consider to wear pants and break her parents’ other rules.
‘The Seewalds made an impression on me, specifically because they didn’t dress the same way I did. The women wore pants,’ she wrote.
They listened to music I didn’t. So much of their lifestyle and decisions didn’t line up with how I thought Christians ought to live,’ she said.
In fact, the mom-of-two has even recently started sporting shorts – which is definitely a far cry from her parents’ strict dress code.
On March 23, she posted a video of herself wearing short shorts with cutouts.
Joy-anna Duggar has also joined in on the charge of wearing pants.
She said that her and Austin – who tied the knot in 2017 – began talking about her wearing pants within the ‘first year of marriage.’
‘Austin and I prayed about this for a long time, and I think we had the first conversation within our first year of marriage,’ she said.
‘It wasn’t something that I was super persistent about studying. I’d always worn skirts my whole life, and so for me I wasn’t in a rush,’ she explained
Joy-anna said she and her husband Austin ‘prayed’ on the matter of pants and decided there wasn’t anything in the bible that stated she couldn’t wear them
Jessa rarely strays from skirts but has been spotted wearing pants on occasion liked these ripped skinny jeans
Jana hasn’t spoken out about it but has no problem wearing pants
‘So really the last year we really prayed about it and felt like there wasn’t anything in scripture — there isn’t anything in scripture that’s black and white on dress.
‘It talks a lot about modesty, but I feel like you can be modest and wear pants, and so that’s kind of where we came to.
‘I think basically we just looked through scripture for a long time and feel like this is okay for our family and where we are,’ she explained.
Joy-Anna said: ‘I do try to be modest in my pants, like in wearing pants, and not things too tight or too short.’
While their sisters Jessa, Jill and Jana haven’t spoken out about changing their dress code, they have all uploaded photos of themselves wearing pants.
Jill wears pants the most frequently. Jana switches it up between dresses and pants while Jessa still mostly wears skirts and dresses and will rarely let herself be seen in pants.
Jana especially shocked fans when she not only wore shorts but a tank top as well during a boat outing with her brother John David Duggar and his wife Abbie.
Another big no-no in the Duggar household is tattoos or piercings of any kind.
Leviticus 19:28 reads: ‘Ye shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor print or tattoo any marks upon you: I am the Lord.’
Since the Duggars are very devout to the bible, it’s a rule they’ve applied in their household as well.
None of the direct family members have gotten tattoos. Their cousin Amy Duggar and Jinger’s husband, Jeremy Vuolo are the only relatives to have ink.
Jill got a nose piercing just after she leaving Counting On in 2017. For a while, she wore a stud in her piercing but in recent times, she has opted for a ring
Jinger Duggar has pierced her ears
Jessa has earrings, even though she rarely lets them be seen
Jana also has pierced her ears and it seems her father Jim Bob doesn’t seem to mind
Even matriarch Michelle Duggar has her ears pierced!
However, the siblings have partaken in piercing their ears and even their nose for one.
In November 2017, just after she and her husband Derick Dillard left the show Counting On, Jill got a nose piercing.
For a while, she wore a stud in her piercing but in recent times, she has opted for a ring.
Meanwhile, her adult sisters have seemingly all gotten their ears pierced.
Jessa, Jana and Jinger have all been spotted wearing earrings. However, it seems Jim Bob and Michelle may be lenient when it comes to ear piercings.
The Duggar family blog stated that Michelle had taken her daughter Jordyn to get her ears pierced when she was six. In fact, Michelle even has her own tiny stud earrings.
The Duggars also have a rule against the women cutting or dying their hair. Their philosophy is that women’s hair is the most beautiful in its natural state.
In their memoir Growing Up Duggar, the older sisters state that they follow a bible verse which encourages them to keep their hair long.
‘Our hairstyle is our choice and we choose longer hair based on our understanding of 1 Corinthians 11:14-15,’ they wrote.
‘While it is a shame for a man to have long hair, a woman’s hair is her glory.’
Jill has has died her hair blonde which she showed off on Instagram. ‘Lovin’ my new blonde look!’ She exclaimed in the post’s caption.
Snip snip: Jinger has also died her hair blonde and cut it short
Meanwhile, Joy-anna went the opposite direction and darkened her hair to a deep brown while getting bangs
Since then, she has opted for lighter brunette hair with golden highlights and recently got a significant chop
However, a good number of the Duggar daughters have gotten their hair done professionally.
Jill has has died her hair blonde which she showed off on Instagram.
‘Lovin’ my new blonde look!’ She exclaimed in the post’s caption.
Jinger has also died her hair blonde and cut it short.
Meanwhile, Joy-anna went the opposite direction and darkened her hair to a deep brown while getting bangs. Since then, she has opted for lighter brunette hair with golden highlights and recently got a significant chop.
The Duggars manage their kids’ social media and social activities including alcohol consumption, music and travel
Jana has broken the Duggars’ rule since she has a social media account despite being unmarried
The Duggars have strict rules about the kind of social activities their children engage in.
For instance, the Duggars don’t allow any music that may encourage dancing.
In a 2008 episode of their show, Jim Bob expressed how he maintained that rule in their home.
‘I think any of the little ones, when they hear music, they start jiggling around; that’s natural. That’s why we’re careful about the music we allow in our home,’ he stated.
On a later episode of Counting on, he elaborated: ‘We noticed when there was a rock beat the kids would be jumping around. We thought the more calm the music the more calm the kids would be.’
While speaking with E! News, Michelle has said that dancing encourages ‘sensual’ feelings while Jessa warned that modern day music is ‘promoting sex, drugs, all that type of stuff.’
Instead, they listen to ‘gospel music. However, it seems like a number of the siblings have children changed their mindset.
Jinger reflected on how her parents’ teachings under Bill Gothard made her fear rock music and drums so much that she thought she would die if it came on in her memoir.
She shared: ‘He said anything with this specific beat in a drum is harmful. It’s dangerous.
‘He told the story of a young man who was in a car accident and died because he was listening to music with drums.
Jason Duggar uploaded a video of him attending a lively country music concert, which shocked many fans
Jill has made the decision to drink alcohol and has even posted a picture of herself with a pina colada on Instagram
Jinger also weighed in on drinking and has implied that she doesn’t drink herself but she has been pictured with a kombucha alcoholic drink during a date night with Jeremy
The Duggars have a rule against traveling without a chaperone. Jana hasn’t been shy about posting her solo expeditions on her Instagram account though.
‘I remember one time we were on our way to one of the seminars and somebody turned on music with drums in the car. I was freaking out.
‘I just thought, “Goodness, this is it. We’re going to have a car accident because somebody turned this on.” I was so fearful. It just consumed my life.’
On the show, Jana has expressed: ‘We’ve had more of I guess a conservative side of music and no dancing.’
The show then showed a clip of her dancing around to music from a child’s toy.
Defending herself, she stated, ‘I think with any person you may have different views when you’re younger and things change when you get older and vice versa.’
Jason Duggar even uploaded a video of him attending a lively country music concert, which shocked many fans.
‘Great evening with friends at the Walmart Amp, CoJo you’re a legend!’ He wrote in the caption.
Alcohol cosumption is also greatly frowned upon in the Duggar household. Jim Bob and Michelle are both sober and have encouraged their kids to maintain the same practice.
However, Jill has made the decision to drink alcohol and has even posted a picture of herself with a pina colada on Instagram. She has also spoken out about the decision and how her family might feel about it.
‘Growing up, the whole idea of drinking was not encouraged,’ she told People.
‘I know my parents would not be happy with it, and I know that my siblings, some more than others, would probably have an issue with it.
‘Other ones would probably be like, “Whatever’s good for y’all, that’s fine. Live your life.” So far nobody’s said anything to us about it.’
Jinger has shown pictures of she and Jeremy dressed up in Winnie the Pooh and Tigger onesies Halloween in spite of her parents’ distaste for the holiday
She also has taken her kids trick or treating to celebrate the holiday
Jinger also weighed in on drinking and has implied that she doesn’t drink herself but she doesn’t think it’s a ‘sin’ to cosume alcohol.
In her memoir, she penned: ‘On every topic, I have had to come back and say, “Well, what does God’s word actually say?”
‘The Bible is very clear about drinking, and it simply says that alcohol is not a sin. Jesus made wine at a wedding.’
She added: ‘I don’t have a problem with other Christians. It’s there liberty to drink if they so choose.’
However, she has been pictured with a kombucha alcoholic drink during a date night with Jeremy. Additionally, a server admitted to serving them alcohol to an Instagram rumor account.
Unsurprisingly, the Duggars also have rules regarding social media. Jim Bob not only has insisted that he has to approve of posts in the past, but also doesn’t want his unmarried daughters on social media.
However, Jana, who is still single, is on social media. Additioanlly, they have a rule against traveling without a chaperone.
Jana hasn’t been shy about posting her solo expeditions on her Instagram account though.
Josiah has shared snaps of him and his wife Lauren on the beach as well as Jeremiah with his wife Hannah
Meanwhile, both Jill and her brother John-David Duggar have brought their children to the beach
Since Jim Bob himself has taken a selfie with his daughter Jana on the beach, it’s likely one of their less-enforced rules
The Duggars also have strong stances on holidays – especially Halloween.
They have told E! News that magic and witches are ‘part of a demonic realm God wants us to stay away from.’
However, Jinger has shown pictures of she and Jeremy dressed up in Winnie the Pooh and Tigger onesies Halloween and her kids trick or treating in costumes.
The Duggars also have held off on taking their kids to the beach of they can help it.
‘It’s just too hard for the guys to try and keep their eyes averted,’ Michelle explained to E! News.
When they would go to the beach, the women would wear long-sleeve shirts and skirts.
Since moving out of the Duggar household, most of the siblings have broken this rule and gone to the beach with their significant others or family.
Josiah has shared snaps of him and his wife Lauren as well as Jeremiah with his wife Hannah.
Meanwhile, both Jill and her brother John-David Duggar have brought their children to the beach.
Since Jim Bob himself has taken a selfie with his daughter Jana on the beach, it’s likely one of their less-enforced rules.
Jinger Duggar wrote a memoir slamming the religious principles her parents taught
Jinger has claimed that Bill Gothard’s teachings are ‘based on superstition, manipulation, control’ in her memoir Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentagling Faith From Fear
Religion is one topic that the Duggar children have been very careful not to stray from.
All of them have ‘Christ follower’ written in their Instagram bios and have posted often about prayer.
However, Jinger spoke out against the teachings of Bill Gothard – shunned minister that initiated the Institute in Basic Life Principles.
Michelle and Jim Bob are devout followers of his teachings, but Jinger has claimed that they are ‘based on superstition, manipulation, control’ in her memoir Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentagling Faith From Fear.
She reflected on her newfound outlook on Gothard that she focused on in her book during an interview with ET.
‘It was based on superstition, manipulation, control, and so my view of God was warped,’ she shared.
‘I was promised that if I followed these teachings from Bill Gothard, this man, that my life would be a success and God would bless me.
‘But if I didn’t follow every principle that he taught, then my life would be one disaster after another.
‘The teachings of Bill Gothard, they have lasting effects, so I am still working through a lot of that.
‘Even though it’s hard that I’m having to walk through all of this, I can see it as God carrying me through.’
After she married Jeremy, she turned her back on Gothard’s Institute in Basic Life Principles for good
After Jill and her husband Derick left the show in 2017 and she was ‘ex-communicated’ from the IBLP, she felt a strain in her relationship with her parents and the rest of the Duggar clan
‘Bill would take one verse of the Bible and make it say whatever he wanted it to say and he would make up his own man-made rules and say, “This is the Bible,”‘ Jinger explained.
‘And then he would have you vow to God to keep this principle. It was very binding. He would say, “Never break your vow before God.” It was fear-based.’
After marrying her husband, Jeremy Vuolo, 35, in 2016, Jinger officially parted ways with IBLP, however, she did remain a ‘strong Christian.’
‘I thought, “How is this possible?” I always thought Bill was a Bible teacher. And that was a lightbulb moment,’ she added.
‘It helped me to become free. I was no longer bound by this one man. I wasn’t going to follow one man – I was going to follow Jesus. I was going to follow the word of God as I saw in the Scripture.
‘I was gripped by fear every single day. And I’m not anymore… Those burdens have been lifted. And I began to see the beauty of who Jesus is. It freed my heart.’
Her sister Jill was shunned from the family for also questioning the IBLP’s teachings.
After Jill and her husband Derick left the show in 2017 and she was ‘ex-communicated’ from the IBLP, she felt a strain in her relationship with her parents and the rest of the Duggar clan.
‘We’re not on the best terms with some of my family,’ she told People in 2020.
‘We’ve had some disagreements, but we’re working towards healing definitely and restoration, but we’re having to kind of just take some time and heal.’
The Duggars have strict rules for courtship and also set expectations for their childrens’ marriages
Scandalous! Jeremiah posted a snap of him and his wife Hannah making out despite their parents’ insistence on no PDA
As previously stated, the Duggars have a very stringent courting process.
All of them have followed it leading up to marraige and claimed to be abstinent and even save their first kiss for the wedding.
When Jessa and Ben Seewald started courting, Michelle claimed the two were good about following their ‘side hug’ rule.
‘Dad allowed them to do a side hug when they were officially courting,’ she told People.
‘Jessa and Ben have said that was the only contact they would have — when they initially greet each other, when he comes to visit for their first hello, they have a quick 30 second or less side hug and a goodbye side hug.’
However, some siblings have admitted to breaking courtship rules.
When Jessa and Ben Seewald started courting, Michelle claimed the two were good about following their ‘side hug’ rule
Joy-anna and Austin Forsyth were caught engaging in a frontal hug that lasted more than three seconds while filming Counting On as they courted each other
Josiah also broke the courtship rules. He and his then-fiancee Lauren uploaded a picture from a trip in Missouri that they seemingly took all on their own
Ironically, Jim Bob and Michelle didn’t follow their own courtship rules when they while dating. However, they claim to have regrets and wish they had saved their first kiss for after marriage
Joy-anna has admitted to missing curfew and talking on the phone without supervision while courting her husband Austin Forsyth. Additionally they were caught engaging in a frontal hug that lasted more than three seconds while filming Counting On.
‘We’re humans and sometimes we don’t always abide perfectly by our rules,’ Austin said during the reunion special.
‘I didn’t even notice that they were there,’ he said of the camera crew who caught the moment. ‘I thought it was just us there, and that was really special.’
Josiah also broke the courtship rules. He and his then-fiancee Lauren uploaded a picture from a trip in Missouri that they seemingly took all on their own.
Ironically, Jim Bob and Michelle didn’t follow their own courtship rules when they while dating. However, they claim to have regrets and wish they had saved their first kiss for after marriage.
‘We hope they save [the] physical for when they are married,’ Jim Bob told Radar.
‘When Michelle and I were dating we took things [further] than we should have and we regret that.
‘We hope they hold off on any physical aspect until they’re married and that they focus on their spiritual relationship.’
There has been speculation that Jana was possibly in a gay relationship with her best friend Laura DeMasie
Jim Bob allegedly felt so threatened by the relationship that he arranged for Laura to have a dream job offer in Atlanta so she’d have to move
An additional, mostly unspoken rule, of their courtship practices is that they must be between a man and a woman.
There has been speculation that Jana was possibly in a gay relationship with her best friend Laura DeMasie.
The two have traveled together and Jim Bob even insisted on chaperoning them on a trip to Las Vegas.
A source divulged to The Hollywood Gossip that Jana is gay but her family is ‘totally anti-gay.’
‘She’s gay, and she just doesn’t know how she’s gonna admit that she’s gay, but she’s in love with her best friend,’ the source advised.
‘Eventually what’s gonna have to happen, is that she’s gonna have to bite the bullet and come out, or become celibate,’ the source told THG.
‘Her family is totally anti-gay, of course, so I really don’t how that’s gonna be.’
Jim Bob allegedly felt so threatened by the relationship that he arranged for Laura to have a dream job offer in Atlanta so she’d have to move.
They stopped talking for a while. However, the two took a trip to Italy together so who know what’s in store for the two of them.
Once the Duggar children are married, they’re still expected not to display too much PDA. However, many of them have broken that rule on their social media pages.
Jill and John David have both posted steamy kiss pictures of them and their respective spouses.
Most recently, Jeremiah Duggar included a video with a number of steamy kisses, including one of them in a private plane, to celebrate their first wedding anniversary.
PDA Alert: Jill and John David have both posted steamy kiss pictures of them and their respective spouses
Once they are married, the women are expected not to use birth control but Jill has spoken out about using non-hormonal birth control
Additionally, once they are married, the women are expected not to use birth control and be open to any pregnancies. In fact, Michelle has expressed that she keeps spare pregnancy tests on hand for her daughters.
However, Jill recently spoke out about her decision to use birth control.
‘Growing up, it was ingrained in me that if you don’t have as many kids as you’re able to, that there’s something wrong with that,’ she told People in 2020.
‘But there was a shift in me where I felt like it wasn’t wrong if you decide as a couple that it’s best for you to wait.
‘We use birth control, but we prefer to use non-hormonal birth control methods,’ she added, also noting that ‘adoption’s always had a special place in our heart.’
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