Hypnotherapist goes viral after sharing ‘dandelions vs orchids’ theory about siblings

A hypnotherapist has gone viral after sharing the ‘dandelions versus orchids’ theory about siblings.

Judy Lee, a US-based TikTok creator who is known as @theorchidchild, took to the video-sharing platform recently to discuss the theory she learned during grad school and why siblings with similar trauma cope differently.

Children who are robust and thrive in all conditions are considered ‘dandelions,’ according to academics.

Meanwhile the ones who are more sensitive and can wilt in a harmful environment without constant care are known as ‘orchids.’

‘If you were raised in an unsafe household and you have a brother or sister, I want you to ask yourself is one of you… way more sensitive than the other one,’ Judy, who uses she/they pronouns, began her video, which showed clips of her and her sister together.

‘And when I say sensitive, I’m not just talking about emotionally sensitive.

‘I’m also talking about how sensitive one is to sound, to food, to allergies, to fabric of clothing – just generally sensitive to the environment.’

Judy goes to say there always seems to be the one sibling who does ‘really well’ compared to the other in an ‘abusive environment.’

‘Somebody who is highly resilient in an abusive household is called a dandelion child,’ they explained in the video, which had more than 1.3 million views at the time of writing.

‘They can basically thrive in any environment like the flower the dandelion itself.

‘But orchid children are highly sensitive to their environment so they can actually wilt or wither away in an abusive environment or thrive and do really well in a positive one. 

‘And of course at first glance it seems that one is much more preferable than the other.

In her viral TikTok, Judy shares her thoughts on the ‘dandelions versus orchids’ theory

‘But what is really interesting with a small piece of evidence that demonstrated if an orchid child is removed from that abusive environment and grows up, and is then replaced into a nurturing and nourishing environment they can actually surpass their dandelion counterparts.

‘I think the moral of the story is that as orchid children it becomes doubly more important for us to find a beautiful community to be a part of.’

In a Buzzfeed interview, Judy also discussed a third type of child, a tulip, who sits in between the two ends of the spectrum.

‘I was a little afraid of posing it as a binary,’ she said.

‘Because especially when you post something on social media, people can be very black or white about it. It isn’t a drastic yes or no, it’s very much a spectrum. The whole point is that it’s a dialectic.’

And it seems Judy’s video has resonated with many people on the internet, attracting thousands of comments

Judy added that just because someone was a dandelion it did not mean they weren’t impacted by trauma, a misconception that some viewers of her TikTok believed.

And it seems their video resonated with many people on the internet, garnering thousands of comments.

‘I have never felt so much validation for how I felt growing up and feel now. I am starting to bloom and thrive finally, but slowly. Thank you,’ one person said.

‘Cries in orchid. But also, thank you for the glimmer at the end. It’s up to me who I’m around now,’ another added. 

‘This is so interesting. I’m the dandelion child but my younger brother is definitely the orchid child. I hope he thrives and surpasses me,’ a third person wrote. 

Someone else said: ‘My sister is an orchid and I’m a dandelion, she suffered at my parents’ house – she is in a safe and happy marriage now, watching her thrive is amazing.’