Jim Carrey’s ex’S note years before her suicide

In a newly-discovered note that she wrote two years before taking her own life, Jim Carrey’s ex-girlfriend blamed the actor for exposing her to a debauched life of sex and drugs and scorned him for ‘giving her’ herpes.

The note was written by Catriona White on April 8, 2013, on her iPad. It is not known if she ever sent it to Carrey before she took her own life on September 28, 2015.

At the time, she and Carrey had broken up after she told him about testing positive for herpes. He insisted and maintains that he never had the disease. 

The note was discovered by lawyers working on behalf of her family in a wrongful death lawsuit against Carrey, 55. They say he gave her the pills to kill herself after obtaining them in a false name and also allege that he gave her STDs without warning her, an accusation he denies. 

On Friday, just as White’s note was obtained by DailyMail.com, Carrey filed his own lawsuit in California against the family and his ex-girlfriend’s former lawyer, claiming their legal efforts were merely an attempt to extort him.  

Jim Carrey’s ex-girlfriend Catriona White penned a note on her iPad in April 2013 – two years before her suicide – which blamed the actor for giving her herpes and accused him of ruining her life 

The note was discovered on White's iPad by lawyers working for her family in a wrongful death lawsuit against Carrey 

The note was discovered on White’s iPad by lawyers working for her family in a wrongful death lawsuit against Carrey 

In it, he revealed that he in 2013, he paid White an undisclosed amount after she demanded ‘millions’ from him to stop her going to the press about her herpes diagnosis.  

Carrey said it was a ‘mistake’ to settle the claims with her and her former lawyer and vowed: ‘I will not give in a second time.’ 

CATRIONA WHITE’S FULL NOTE 

You have not thought about the stigma I have to live with for the rest of my life, you have not apologized or once asked is there something you can do to make it better or even felt bad for it.

Or even ask me how I’m feeling about it. Instead you did a whole lot of screaming and turned it around on me.

Have you even once sat down and really thought how this affects me? I still love you and I believed that you sent that text because you cared about me.

I was going to tell my lawyer that I didn’t want to go any further with it when I realized you changed lawyers and you were advised to text me. It wasn’t coming from you at all, you probably hate me and are saying whatever is necessary. 

‘The decent thing to do, what is that? I think keeping quiet and private about it when I want to scream from the rooftops is a decent thing to do . You know what I want and it’s nothing to do with money.

‘I didn’t get a lawyer so I can take your money and I’m probably going to get in trouble for texting you. I’m sure you will use it against me but I wanted to say this Thursday. Whatever the lawyers decide to do I don’t care.

This is what I want, you gave me hsv and hpv, I want you to apologize for it because you care enough to. I want you to understand that however little a thing seems to you, it ruins a girl’s life.

‘I want you to take care when you are with other girls and pay attention to your body your actions effect people. I don’t want to be disrespected like you have been doing. 

‘Before you, I might not have had very much but I had respect, I was a happy person. I loved life, I was confident and I felt good in my skin and was proud of most decisions I made, I met you, you introduced me to cocaine, prostitutes, mental abuse and disease. You did good things for me but being with you broke me down as a person Jim. I was promise Jekyll and instead I got Hyde.

‘Because I love you I would have stuck out Hyde all year and done everything he wanted to be with Jekyll for 5 of those but you threw me away when you absorbed anything worthwhile that was left of me.’ 

White’s 2013 note describes in her own words the couple’s tumultuous relationship and gives a damning description of how she felt the actor treated her. 

In it, she told how she ‘was promised Jekyll but got Hyde’. 

‘You did good things for me but being with you broke me down as a person Jim. I was promise Jekyll and instead I got Hyde. 

‘Because I love you I would have stuck out Hyde all year and done everything he wanted to be with Jekyll for 5 of those but you threw me away when you absorbed anything worthwhile that was left of me,’ she wrote. 

White, who was 30 when she died, blamed Carrey for giving her HPV and HSV – the medical abbreviation for Herpes Simplex – and begged him to take more care with other girls. 

‘You have not thought about the stigma I have to live with for the rest of my life, you have not apologized or once asked is there something you can do to make it better or even felt bad for it. 

‘You gave me HSV and HPV, I want you to apologize for it because you care enough to. I want you to understand that however little a thing seems to you, it ruins a girl’s life.

‘I want you to take care when you are with other girls and pay attention to your body your actions effect people.’ 

The Irish-born beauty also said: ‘Before you, I might not have had very much but I had respect, I was a happy person. I loved life, I was confident and I felt good in my skin and was proud of most decisions I made, I met you, you introduced me to cocaine, prostitutes, mental abuse and disease. 

‘You did good things for me but being with you broke me down as a person Jim.’ 

Carrey, who carried White’s casket at her 2015 funeral before the suit was filed, claims her STD accusations are fake. 

In his counter lawsuit on Friday, his lawyers described a ‘cottage industry’ which he said fed on extorting celebrities and ‘people in Hollywood who have achieved notoriety’. 

He categorized Mark Burton, White’s ex-husband who filed the wrongful death suit on her behalf along with her mother Bridget Sweetman, as part of a subscriber to the industry. 

‘Fighting the accusations is painful, time consuming, and extremely expensive—irrespective of the validity or outcome of the claims,’ he said. 

He described White as a ‘beautiful but immature and emotionally damaged woman’ at the start of their relationship and alleges that her former attorney, Filippo Marchino, took advantage of her ‘warm and exciting’ romance with the star to profit.

They allege that before her death, she threatened to ‘go to the press’ with her claim that he had given her Herpes unless he gave her ‘millions of dollars’.

He settled her claim and paid her an undisclosed amount to stop her from making the issue public but insists it was not him who gave her the disease. 

In 2015, the pair got back together despite their earlier legal feud.

Carrey and White were together briefly in late 2012 and at the start of 2013 but then broke up abruptly when she revealed her herpes diagnosis. In 2013, he claims he gave her an undisclosed amount of money to stop her going to the press. The pair reconciled in May 2015 (above) and she killed herself in September 2015 

Carrey and White were together briefly in late 2012 and at the start of 2013 but then broke up abruptly when she revealed her herpes diagnosis. In 2013, he claims he gave her an undisclosed amount of money to stop her going to the press. The pair reconciled in May 2015 (above) and she killed herself in September 2015 

Carrey’s lawsuit claims he thought they would be together permanently after their reconciliation and that her suicide cut that short. 

‘Then, on the verge of a lasting relationship and love affair, came the unthinkable loss that was Cat’s suicide,’ it said.

I made the mistake of giving in and settling false claims….I will not give in a second time 

Jim Carrey on Friday as he filed his own lawsuit against White’s family  

In a statement to DailyMail.com on Friday afternoon, Carrey said: ‘Today I filed a cross-complaint against Fillipo Marchino, The X Law Group, Mark Burton and Brigid Sweetman. 

‘Unfortunately, I made the mistake three years ago of giving in and settling false claims made against me by Mr. Marchino, on behalf of Cat, as mounting a public defense is a very costly and painful process. 

‘At the time I felt Cat was being exploited by Marchino. Since this new case was filed, I have discovered the depth of deception behind those false claims, the kind of deception decent people fall for, because to us, such behavior is unimaginable.

‘I will not give in a second time to these same fraudulent charges initiated by Cat’s husband in name but not substance Mark Burton, and her estranged mother. 

‘Nor am I responsible for what these desperate characters have inadvertently unearthed about the woman I adored. I was clearly blinded by my affection. 

Carrey (above at her funeral in 2015) claims her family's attempts to blame him for her death now amount to extortion 

Carrey (above at her funeral in 2015) claims her family’s attempts to blame him for her death now amount to extortion 

‘Regardless, I will hold a place of empathy, and forgiveness for Cat and continue to focus on the many blessings in this life.’ 

His lawsuit claimed that he wanted to marry her and that he allowed her to live at his house in Malibu while he was out of the country for work because she had no way of making a living. At the time, White was living in the country illegally. 

In his version of events, he seriously considered marrying the woman and began drafting a prenuptial agreement. 

He claimed he called it off, however, when it became apparent to him that ‘for her, the marriage ‘was more about convenience and finding a way to stay in the United States without fear of deportation than about her love for him.’ 

On October 20, he claimed told her he would not marry her but that he wanted to continue dating and would help her gain legal status in the country by hiring her an immigration attorney. 

The next day, she drafted a suicide note which was revealed after her death two years later. 

Carrey claimed his decision not to marry her turned her ‘bitter and angry’ and that she ‘lashed out’ when he told her to ‘ease off’. 

‘Dissatisfied, Cat soon became bitter and angry, taking Jim’s decision not to marry her as rejection. She began placing more pressure on him, including sending him a text adding his last name to hers, “Cathriona Anne Carrey, . . . how does that sound,'” his lawsuit claimed.  

He claimed she continued to put pressure on him to marry her and alleged that this was the reason he called off their romance. 

She then, weeks later, married ‘acquaintance’ Mark Burton as a means of staying in the country, he said and claims that had the union only took place after she begged other men to marry her to gain immigration status. 

‘Cat tried on several occasions to convince other men to marry her so that she could stay in the country and circumvent immigration laws. At one point, she even staged a phony wedding and posted pictures of it on Facebook.

‘On another, she was set to marry a man she was seeing until she learned he was already married. Prior to their marriage, Cat and Mr. Burton had worked together but knew little about each other—they had never dated, had never lived together, and they never intended to live as husband and wife. 

‘In fact, Mr. Burton was “hooking up” with one of Cat’s friends at the time and after they married. they decided to marry,’ his lawsuit claims. 

On Friday, White’s attorney Michael J. Avennatti accused the actor of being unstable and pointed to a recent appearance he made at New York Fashion Week which drew concern for his wellbeing. 

‘As his red carpet interview from a few weeks ago shows, the guy is incoherent and unhinged. He needs help,’ Avennatti said. 

The interview occurred on September 9 in New York City. Carrey, who’d arrived alone to the event, told E! reporter Cat Sadler who asked him for a question: ‘There’s no meaning to any of this. 

‘I just wanted to find the most meaningless thing that I could come to and join, and here I am. You’ve got to admit, this is completely meaningless.’ 

When she responded to say the event was scheduled to honor icons, he replied: ‘Celebrating icons? Oh boy, that is just the lowest aiming possibility that we could come up with. Icons. Do you believe in icons? I believe in personalities. I don’t believe that you exist but there is a wonderful fragrance in the air. 

‘I don’t believe in icons. I don’t believe in personalities. I believe that peace lies beyond personality, beyond invention and disguise. I believe we’re a field of energy dancing for itself. And I don’t care.’ 

White's mother Bridget Sweetwater (L) and her ex-husband Mark Burton (R) are suing Carrey for her death, alleging that he gave her the pills she used to take her own life

White's mother Bridget Sweetwater (L) and her ex-husband Mark Burton (R) are suing Carrey for her death, alleging that he gave her the pills she used to take her own life

White’s mother Bridget Sweetman (L) and her ex-husband Mark Burton (R) are suing Carrey for her death, alleging that he gave her the pills she used to take her own life

Notes written by White's therapist in 2013 shed further light on their troubled relationship 

Notes written by White’s therapist in 2013 shed further light on their troubled relationship 

Previously obtained court documents revealed that White ‘wanted it all to stop’ in the months before her STD diagnosis.  

Session notes and text messages obtained by DailyMail.com that span from October 2012 to July 2013 reveal that Cathriona White had been seeing Carrey for just six months when he suddenly broke off the relationship, a move that came after White had been tested for STDs but before she had received her results.

The results came back positive soon after, and White told her therapist that she had contracted the STDs from Carrey, claiming that she questioned bumps on his genitals before her first outbreak but he dismissed them as irritation from shaving.

Text messages from White to Carrey show a similar exchange as well between the two at this time.

”These contemporaneous notes prove what we have said along and show what kind of person Carrey really is,’ Sweetman’s lawyer Michael Avennati told DailyMail.com in a statement.

In his countersuit on Friday, Carrey described his ex as a 'beautiful but immature and emotionally damaged woman' 

In his countersuit on Friday, Carrey described his ex as a ‘beautiful but immature and emotionally damaged woman’ 

‘His claims of innocence relating to Ms. White are bogus and shameful.’ 

The notes from January 30 also reveal that White ‘wishes [Carrey] would marry her as her promised so that she can work and be more self-sufficient.’

That surprising admission came just 15 days after White wed estranged husband Mark Burton in Las Vegas. 

‘The thing that becomes clear is that she is extremely upset because she wanted Jim to marry her,’ said a source close to the case.

‘And the reason she wanted to Jim to marry her is so that she could stay in the country.’ 

White began seeing the therapist in October and claimed Carrey ‘issues’ that left him ‘down and dark’ during a November session.

During that same December 4 session she talked about being terrified when she watched Carrey pick up and smash a computer against his wall then voiced how upset it made her that Carrey would ‘send her home when he feels like it and not keep in touch with her until days later when he wants company.’

The therapist noted: ‘[White] has so little self-esteem. Very impressionable and little ego strength. Also very afraid of [Carrey] and his temper, yet she wants to rescue and help him.’

Just few months prior, White’s therapist noted that she seemed to ‘light up’ when she spoke of her new love interest.

Shortly after the new year, White told her therapist in a phone call that she had ‘tried to commit suicide with a bottle of painkillers that she got from JC’ after he broke things off two days prior on January 8.

White texted this admission to her therapist while on a bus to Utah to see her estranged husband Marc Burton according to the session notes, and at that time the therapist recommended that White see a psychiatrist for medication.

That is disputed by a source however, who states: ‘The only pills that were available to [White] in January 2013 were her pain medication and prescription she got from her doctor. If she attempted to take her life it was from her own prescription pills.’

A week after that suicide attempt she married Burton. 

White and her therapist spoke again a week after the wedding, again by text, in a conversation initiate by White’s therapist.

DailyMail.com previously revealed that an STD test that was submitted as evidence under the name Jose Lopez tested positive for herpes and chlamydia.

White’s mother and ex-husband believe the results belong to Carrey and that he underwent the test using a false name to avoid detection. 

White was ‘spending time with friends’ and admitted to being ‘fearful about the future’ according to the notes, which also say that she has promised to keep in touch on a daily basis.

She did not do this however and two days later cancelled her session on January 19, though she does speak with her therapist on January 21 after reuniting with Carrey.

The notes from that sessions describe White as being ‘incredibly distressed’ and ‘feeling like she wanted to hurt herself when JC kicked her out of his home in a drug-induced rage.’

White also spends a great deal of time alone while waiting for Carrey to be free according to the notes.

She is still ‘not doing well’ six days later according to the therapist, who notes that White is meeting immigration lawyers provided by Carrey and that the actor ‘is going to pay for an apartment for a year and some spending money’ for the woman.

On January 30, the therapist noted White was ‘noticing a breakout in her genitals.’

‘[White] claims she was tested before she slept with [Carrey] was free of any STDs,’ read the notes, which go on to detail how she ‘noticed bumps on [Carrey’s] penis but he told her it was from shaving.’

She is then described as ‘living in a constant state of fight or flight.’

On February 7, White is described as ‘very fragile and thin’ and ‘still devastated over the breakup.’

Four days later she is ‘very emotional’ according to the notes for her session, during which she tells her therapist Carrey ‘texted her few nights ago asking her to come over and “cuddle” then changed his mind.’

Read more at DailyMail.co.uk