Most common arguments couples have on Christmas

Christmas can be an exciting time for fresh and seasoned couples as they prepare to meet family members and friends, exchange gifts, and celebrate together.

But the holidays also mean plenty of stress and mess, and even the strongest partners sometimes find themselves fighting far more than usual.

Sexologist Dr Nikki Goldstein has revealed the most common arguments couples have on Christmas – and tips on how to make sure they don’t last into the New Year.

With the stress of Christmas comes plenty of potential fights for couples and sexologist Nikki Goldstein has revealed the most common arguments couples have during the holidays (stock image)

‘Tis the season for giving, but with the traditional gift exchange comes the stress of worrying about buying the perfect present for your partner.

Dr Goldstein revealed that when couples fight over gifts, what they’re really arguing about is the consideration that was put into it. 

‘It’s not actually about the present, it’s about what it represents,’ she told Daily Mail Australia. 

‘It’s not about being ungrateful, it’s when one person gets something for someone and put a lot of thought into it and the other person doesn’t.’ 

‘It could be that you feel your partner doesn’t put enough consideration into you or doesn’t really know you.’ 

Dr Goldstein advises not arguing about the present on Christmas day, and to put less pressure on the gift itself.

Dr Goldstein revealed that when couples fight over gifts, what they're really arguing about is the consideration that was put into the item - not the present itself (stock image)

Dr Goldstein revealed that when couples fight over gifts, what they’re really arguing about is the consideration that was put into the item – not the present itself (stock image)

‘Try and see the good in it. That they have made an effort and they have gone out and got you something,’ she said.  

If you’re still worried about the gift exchange, Dr Goldstein recommends buying something you can enjoy together with your partner, dropping hints, or putting your money together for a trip. 

The question of where to spend Christmas day can also be a sore spot for couples. 

Dr Goldstein revealed that this is a common issue between partners, but it also has an easy solution. 

‘You either alternate the years or split up the day,’ she said. ‘A lunch with one family and a dinner with the other, or Christmas Eve with one family and Christmas day with the other.’

Dr Goldstein also suggests bringing both families together for one big celebration, while still making sure to respect each other’s traditions.

And if your partner doesn’t want to do Christmas together at all, Dr Goldstein said it could reflect where you’re both at in the relationship. 

The question of where to spend Christmas day is one of the most common arguments couples have during the holidays, Goldstein revealed (stock image)

The question of where to spend Christmas day is one of the most common arguments couples have during the holidays, Goldstein revealed (stock image)

‘If it has only been a few months, don’t freak out about that,’ she said. 

‘But if it’s six months to a year, I think you have to question whether they’re as serious about the relationship as you are.’

With so many parties on the calendar and family members to host during the silly season, it can be tough to find time for intimacy with your partner.

And with the pressure that comes with visiting family members and events to attend, Dr Goldstein notes that sometimes you might not even feel like having sex. 

She advises trying to put less pressure on each other in the bedroom, and just finding some time to be ‘intimate’ with each other instead.

‘Spend some time alone together,’ she said. ‘It doesn’t have to be Fifty Shades of Grey, but some intimate time is what you’re aiming for.’ 

With so many parties and family members during the silly season, it can be tough to find time for intimacy with your partner during the holiday season (stock image)

With so many parties and family members during the silly season, it can be tough to find time for intimacy with your partner during the holiday season (stock image)

Dr Goldstein also advises taking a lovely outing or going on a quick adventure together during the busy holiday season. 

‘When you can increase that excitement in the relationship, you’ll be in a better mood and more loving toward each other – and hopefully that will transfer into the bedroom,’ she said. 

If you do end up having a fight, Dr Goldstein said it’s important to remember that this time of year is always difficult for relationships. 

‘It’s the end of the year, everyone’s very stressed, feeling pressured, and they’re reflecting on the relationship. It kind of is that tipping point,’ she said. 

Dr Goldstein recommends taking a step back and deciding if the argument is something you need to discuss now, or whether it can wait until the New Year.

‘Maybe it’s just a matter of feeling stressed and overwhelmed,’ she said. 

‘Give each other a bit of a break and be aware there’s a lot of stress on people, which can have an effect on the relationship.’ 

If you do end up having a fight, Dr Goldstein said its important to remember that this time of year is difficult for relationships and to potentially put the argument on hold until the New Year (stock image)

If you do end up having a fight, Dr Goldstein said its important to remember that this time of year is difficult for relationships and to potentially put the argument on hold until the New Year (stock image)



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