Mother shares ‘life-changing’ advice for keeping children safe

A mother has shared ‘life-changing’ advice about having a secret family code word for children and teens to use whenever they are feeling uncomfortable or unsafe.

Katie Peters, 43, from Ohio, has gone viral on TikTok after opening up about how her 19-year-old son still uses the word ‘banana’ to let her and her husband know he is in a worrisome social situation and needs saving. 

‘If you are the parent of a child, ages 0 to 23, I want you to listen to this. I want to give you just a little piece of advice that can be life-changing for your relationship with your child,’ the educator said at the start of the video. 

Peters explained that when her son was about three years old, another parent advised that her family come up with a code word to use in the rare event that she or her husband couldn’t pick him up from daycare. 

The educator and her husband first came up with a code word when her son was three to help him know who was a ‘safe person’ versus a ‘stranger trying to abduct him’

Family code words are supposed to help children know the difference between a ‘safe person that they can get into the car with’ and a ‘stranger trying to abduct them.’ 

‘So we immediately did that,’ she said. ‘We taught him the family code word. He knew not to tell anyone what the word was, and the only people who would know that word were people his father and I trusted implicitly with him. But what I could have never predicted was how long that code word would go into play. 

‘You see, as our son got older and ventured into social situations where he maybe sometimes was not so comfortable, he could call or text us and drop that code word into a normal conversation, and it would send a message to his father and me that he needed saving.’ 

Peters shared that when her son was younger, he would sometimes use the code word when he was staying the night somewhere and feeling homesick.  

‘As he got into his teenage years, that word became a lifesaver,’ she continued. ‘He was able to use that word whenever he needed out of a social situation and was still able to save face with his peers.’

However, as her son got older, he started using the word when he was feeling uncomfortable or unsafe in certain social situations, including parties

Whenever her son used the word in a phone conversation or text message, she would immediately call him and demand he come home

Whenever her son would drop the word in a phone conversation or text message, she would immediately call him back and insist that he come home as soon as possible.  

‘Sometimes I would lie and say he was in trouble for something he hadn’t done that he was supposed to. Sometimes I would say there’d been a family emergency he needed to get home for immediately. And sometimes he could just play the “my mom is crazy card” and say he had to leave suddenly,’ she recalled. 

Peters said her son has used the word on numerous occasions, including at a party ‘where people were doing things that made him uncomfortable.’ 

‘He dropped that word to me another time in the presence of another individual who was asking to spend the night at our house,’ she added. ‘My son was able to use the word in conversation to let me know it was a no-go. So I said no.’

Peters revealed their family’s code word is ‘banana,’ saying her 19-year-old son still uses it to this day 

The mom also gave examples of how her son worked the word into everyday conversations, saying it was ‘all code that let me know he needed my help’

Peters also shared some advice about how to go about choosing the right code word for your family.  

‘The key is it has to be a word that you can use in regular conversation and other people won’t pick up on it, but also a word you don’t use too often where you have to wonder if [your child] really means it,’ she explained. 

Peter revealed that the word her family has been using for more than a decade is ‘banana,’ and she gave examples of how her son used it.   

‘”Mom, did you remember to get bananas from the store? Hey, I threw away the bananas because they looked rotten. Hey, next weekend will you take me to Wendy’s for their new banana milkshake?” All code that let me know he needed my help,’ she said. 

‘I’m telling you, no matter what age your child is, employ this today. I’m happy to be considered a crazy mom who makes my son come home late rather than have him be somewhere where he’s unsafe, unwelcome, or uncomfortable. 

Peters’ video has been viewed more than 3.8 million times and has received thousands of comments. Many shared stories of their own family’s code words, and how they were used 

‘Family code words for the win.’

Peters’ video has been viewed more than 3.8 million times and has received thousands of comments. 

‘Love this! Our code word was Momma because my girls only called me Mom. It worked great! one woman shared. 

‘When [our] boys were little, anytime they went to a friend’s house and felt uncomfortable, they would call and tell me, “Mom, I forgot to feed the dog,’ another recalled. 

Someone else added: ‘A code word saved me from being kidnapped in 2nd grade after school! I will always do this with my children!’

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