My partner was invited to a wedding and I wasn’t – I’m mad but people say I’m wrong to feel snubbed

A British woman was disgruntled to find out her partner was invited to a friend’s wedding and she was not. 

The unnamed woman revealed on parenting forum Mumsnet that she was annoyed to find out she had not received an invite to attend the nuptial do as her partner’s plus one.

She explained she had been with her partner for nine years, and would not invite half a couple to a wedding, without inviting the other person. 

According to the poster, her partner was not happy about the news either, and told her he would discuss the issue with the soon-to-be-wed couple.

While some forum users were sympathetic, and agreed it was rude to invite someone to a wedding and not their partner, others argued that couples are not ‘joined at the hip’ and that the woman was not entitled to an invitation.  

A British woman was disgruntled to find out that her partner was invited to a friend’s wedding and she was not (stock picture)

In her post, the woman explained she had known both the bride and groom for years, and was shocked to find that the wedding invite had only been addressed to her partner. 

She explained that the only reason she could think of for not being invited was that the groom had been in a relationship with her cousin and cheated on her. 

‘I would never imagine inviting one part of a couple to a wedding,’ she added. 

In another post, she revealed her partner was not happy about the fact she had not been invited, and had said he would talk to the couple about it. 

While some Mumsnetters agreed with the poster that it was rude, many respondents thought the woman should not feel entitled to an invite just because she is the man’s partner.

One wrote: ‘My husband was invited to his school friend’s wedding. I was not. I also thought it very odd but reasoned that they’d maybe each have a ‘school friends’ table and the list had to end somewhere?’ 

‘Weddings are expensive and they don’t owe you an invitation,’ another added. 

‘Their wedding, their choice,’ a third said. 

The woman, who has been with her partner for nine years, said she wouldn't imagine inviting half a couple

The woman, who has been with her partner for nine years, said she wouldn’t imagine inviting half a couple

‘It’s their wedding. They get to choose who goes,’ one person wrote. 

Another agreed, writing: ‘You’re not owed an invite.’

Some people shared examples of times where they or their partner went to an event alone, and they were fine with it. 

One wrote: ‘I have been invited to a wedding without DP. He doesn’t know them as they are a close work friend. Only to say hi. Friend is having a small wedding so cost. Other work friend is single, so we are each others plus ones. Dear partner not bothered as he doesn’t know them. Quite happy to not go and be my taxi.’ 

Another added: ‘I’ve been invited to several weddings without DH. This has been where I have a relationship with the bride or groom but he doesn’t (school friends/work friends etc). As said above, weddings are expensive and not everyone can afford to double the cost of their “friends table” by including OHs who don’t know them or each other.’

‘I’m going to a wedding, my DH hasn’t been invited, only partners have been invited if they are friends of the groom and the bride. I’m v happy with the situation as my DH wouldn’t know anyone if he went,’ one said. 

Some people said the soon-to-be-wed couple did not owe the woman an invitation, and some added that they and their partners went to plenty of weddings without each other

Some people said the soon-to-be-wed couple did not owe the woman an invitation, and some added that they and their partners went to plenty of weddings without each other

‘You aren’t joined at the hip because you are a couple, it’s totally acceptable to still treat people as individuals! But I can agree it’s hurtful,’ one said. 

Some people sided with the woman, agreeing it was rude not to extend the invitation to her.     

It’s very rude. I doubt my dear husband would ever go alone,’ one said. 

‘I hate this. If you can’t afford to have both at the wedding, don’t invite just one,’ another added.

Others agreed that it is rude to invite someone and not their partner, and that is shows a lack of manners

Others agreed that it is rude to invite someone and not their partner, and that is shows a lack of manners

‘At the end of the day it is their choice but I would be outraged if DH even considered going without me (unless I didn’t know the person or something, or maybe when Covid number rules were in play),’ they added. 

‘It has happened to us before and DH said he won’t go. An invite magically appeared for me,’ they went on. 

‘People have no manners,’ another person said. 

‘Very rude. Better not to invite both. Your partner or you should ask whether there [was] an error in printing,’ another said. 

‘People who say it’s their wedding their choice, probably have never been snubbed in this way before,’ one suggested.

‘It is rude and demonstrates a lack of manners. No wonder OP is confused. Decent people don’t do this. It would never occur to me to invite a person and not their other half,’ they added.

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