New research has shown that “outercourse” could be the answer to reaching orgasm during sex.
According to a Melbourne-based sex therapist and clinical psychologist only 20 percent of women have an orgasm through penetration alone.
‘Young men are also very ignorant about women and how to facilitate her orgasm. Because a man doesn’t give his partner an orgasm, he facilitates it,’ Dr Janet Hall told Mamamia.
‘Sex should be about giving and receiving pleasure to the entire body – not just genitals and certainly not just inside the vagina.’
According to a Melbourne-based sex therapist only 20 percent of women have an orgasm through penetration alone (stock image)
Dr Hall is of the belief that the idea of penetration being the number one player in sex is detrimental.
‘Penetration is the male model of ideal sex and they forget that it is the journey and not the destination that is most to be enjoyed,’ she said.
‘In my clinic, most women say they need clitoral stimulation from any source in order to have an orgasm.
‘Though some can have internal stimulation by partner’s fingers or by vibrator or dildo and have G-spot and A-spot (near cervix) orgasms.’
Dr Hall is of the belief that the idea of penetration being the number one player in sex is detrimental (stock image)
Dr Hall’s data was collected over 15 years through a questionnaire on her website and shows that the other 80 percent of women need something else to help them climax.
This is when the term “outercourse” comes in, which includes things such as kissing, massaging, using vibrators, clitoral stimulation and oral sex.
Dr Hall told Mamamia that the term “foreplay” shouldn’t be used to describe this because it implies that it isn’t an important part of a woman’s sexual experience.
She also said that some women feel embarrassed when they can’t orgasm only through penetration which often leads women to feeling like they have to fake one.
‘This is fed by movies and novels where the woman appears to have an orgasm by being breathed on,’ she said.
Dr Hall told Mamamia that the term “foreplay” shouldn’t be used to describe this because it implies that it isn’t an important part of a woman’s sexual experience (stock image)
Dr Hall recommended that women should not put pressure on themselves and should have fun when having sex in order to have a better experience.
‘Read books and find websites online which encourage you to try different things out. Use your imagination.’
Previously adult educator and writer, Jane Untamed, told FEMAIL how to keep the spark alive in a relationship.
She suggested that partners should shake things up and ‘explore new fantasies and fetishes’.
To do this she said to not always have the same kind of sex at the same location and the same time of day.
‘Try out that scene from that movie you just watched together. Find some common kinks,’ she advised FEMAIL.
Previously adult educator and writer, Jane Untamed, suggested that partners should shake things up and ‘explore new fantasies and fetishes’ (stock image)
‘More and more we are becoming open to raunchier ways of expressing our sexuality – be it trying a little light bondage, attending some erotic theatre or a sexy theme party.
‘Leave your comfort zones – this can often be where the magic happens.’
Dr Nikki Goldstein also spoke to Daily Mail Australia about other ways to ensure you are having the best sex possible.
She explained that although touching and kissing can be very prominent at the start of a relationship, they can die down as time goes on, meaning partners should work on bringing them back into the relationship.
‘We’re a hyper sexual society that doesn’t incorporate a lot of touch. Upping touch not only brings more intimacy, it can help women to get more aroused and into sex,’ she said.
Dr Nikki Goldstein (pictured) had also spoken to Daily Mail Australia about other ways to ensure you are having the best sex possible
‘Kissing a lot and touching a lot is a great way to reinvigorate your sex life.’
Dr Goldstein said that you should also focus on making your sex about pleasure, to try new things and to see what works.
‘Don’t be scared to experiment with pleasure and try out things you actually want to do, and not what you think you should want.
‘Explore things because of the physical pleasure they might bring not because it’s taboo.