PLATELL’S PEOPLE: I am a LEGAL immigrant – it’s why I’m keen on the Rwanda plan

The asylum seeker was due to be on the first flight to Rwanda, having arrived on Britain’s shores in a flimsy boat after paying traffickers thousands of pounds to get here.

As he candidly told the BBC this week: ‘If I’d known about the Rwanda scheme, I’d never have come to the UK.’ And that, surely, is the whole reason for the project temporarily thwarted by Leftie human rights lawyers and foreign judges based in Strasbourg, who made sure the flight never took off.

It’s all about deterring those prepared to risk their lives by coming here illegally. About giving out the message that they will not automatically arrive in a land of milk and money, with unlimited benefits, housing, access to the NHS, et cetera.

The first plane set to take migrants to the Rwanda offshore processing centre failed to take off

Priti Patel's Rwanda plan is intended to deter those who'd consider coming here illegally

Priti Patel’s Rwanda plan is intended to deter those who’d consider coming here illegally

The Government is determined that no one thinks arriving in Dover automatically means they have a UK meal-ticket for life.

And that is absolutely right. Let’s not forget how broken the system is. More than 50,000 migrants have crossed the Channel in the past five years, and the cost of putting migrants up in hotels all over the country is a staggering £5 million a day.

Of course, those genuinely fleeing persecution must be cared for by this country. Yet one of the asylum seekers due to take the Rwanda flight, a Vietnamese man, said he sought refuge in the UK because he was being pursued by loan sharks. Another that he needed to be closer to his sister.

We simply can’t let everyone in. A country is no longer a country if it gives up on its borders.

The reason I feel so passionately about illegal migration is that I am an immigrant, after arriving here in 1985 from Australia.

True, my life in Oz was secure and the country’s hardly a hellhole. But I had to meet legal requirements to remain here.

I worked hard and am so grateful for every day I walk this green and pleasant land. I came in through the front door, legitimately. And the Rwanda scheme is there to stop those who aren’t prepared to do so.

So well done Boris Johnson and Priti Patel. The flights to Rwanda will take off one day and become a serious deterrent.

Just ask the chap on the BBC.

Some like it not, Ana

Ana De Armas shared a picture of her as Marilyn Monroe in the upcoming biopic

Ana De Armas shared a picture of her as Marilyn Monroe in the upcoming biopic

Those wondering ‘what next?’ for Ana de Armas after her unforgettable 12-minute performance in Bond movie No Time To Die, now know — it’s playing Marilyn Monroe in Netflix film Blonde. Having seen pictures of her as the Hollywood goddess, I’m afraid it’s a no from me.

Drag queen RuPaul would have been more convincing. But then no one could replicate Norma Jean’s haunting mix of innocence and raw sexuality.

Kim Kardashian lost 16lb to squeeze into the dress Marilyn Monroe wore when she serenaded JFK at his 45th birthday. Experts say Kim’s derriere stressed it so much the sequins were hanging by a thread and the seams stretched beyond repair. Which proves you can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s rear. 

Where’s Woody?

Toy Story spin-off Lightyear gets a drubbing from critics not least because there is no Woody — the linchpin and real hero of the films as the inspirational leader of the toys owned by human Andy.

Creators of this movie went well beyond infinity imagining a Toy Story without Sheriff Woody Pride.

It’s like Lassie without a dog.

Come on, Tom, you’re acting daft!

Tom Hanks said he could not now make Philadelphia as audiences would no longer 'accept the inauthenticity' of his part

Tom Hanks said he could not now make Philadelphia as audiences would no longer ‘accept the inauthenticity’ of his part

Tom Hanks says he wouldn’t now take on his Oscar-winning role in Philadelphia playing a lawyer dying from Aids, as audiences no longer ‘accept the inauthenticity of a straight guy playing a gay guy’.

So he wouldn’t have played a soldier in Saving Private Ryan as he’s never been in the army.

Or his role in Cast Away, as he’s never been marooned — and we’d never have heard him telling his only friend in the film, his volleyball, ‘Don’t worry Wilson, I’ll do all the paddling, you just hang on’ . . . as it drifted off.

Nor would the volleyball have sold for £250,000, or the movie taken more than £300 million at the Box Office.

Much appreciation among volunteers at the Grenfell community kitchen on Wednesday, when the Duchess of Sussex called to mark the fifth anniversary of the fire. Survivors can surely expect a visit from Megs, brandishing her caring credentials . . . with a Netflix camera crew, perhaps?

Lawyers for Ghislaine Maxwell argue she should be spared a 20-year jail sentence for procuring young girls for Jeffrey Epstein and be given just four years as she was emotionally abused by her father, the corrupt media tycoon Robert Maxwell. She’s 60, for heaven’s sake. Too old to blame Daddy!

The hot air? That’s Lineker…

Yesterday was one of those dream summer days — hot sun, cool breeze, sparkling seas, temperatures in the 80s. So who should rain on our parade, but multi-millionaire football pundit Gary Lineker who says do not rejoice ye heathens, this is another example of global warming. Lineker deserves a red card. Send him off, back to his (no-doubt air-conditioned) bachelor pad. 

News that Gordon Ramsay is offering a £137-a-head six-course Father’s Day feast featuring Suffolk lamb and exotic fruits with chocolate cream reminded me of my dad’s favourite dinner — steak, mashed potato with extra butter, peas and ice cream. I lost Dad three years ago. Happy Father’s Day to all those lucky enough to still have one to cook for. 

Ex lead singer of rock band The Libertines Pete Doherty says he knew his affair with Kate Moss was over when she set fire to his teddy bear. Hardly the rock and roll revelation we expect from the former bad-boy crackhead.

 Missing cat’s feline better

My moggie Ted was cheered to hear tabby cat Chubbs was back with his family after being missing for a decade from his Dorset home. He was found skinny and in poor health in Manchester. ‘I knew he was out there,’ said owner Donna Gallacher. And the good news, says Ted, is that Chubbs is, well, chubby again.

Professional purposes only, of course, but I’ve been watching ITV’s Love Island and enjoyed it when Ekin-Su sobbed that she feared her one-day affair with Davide was over as he didn’t make her oat milk coffee. Or I think that’s what she said. Their moronic dialogue is so, like, indecipherable I need subtitles.