Relationship expert Paul C. Brunson reveals 3 steps to get rid of the ick

Relationship expert and Celebs Go Dating star Paul Carrick Brunson has revealed how to deal with the dreaded ‘ick’ in a relationship. 

Today on ITV’s Lorraine, he spoke with presenter Christine Lampard about the ick, as they discussed an Australian groom on Married at First Sight who went viral for his list of icks, which included: ‘girls who are addicted to their phones’, ‘motivational quotes’ and ‘star signs’.

Paul said: ‘The ick is anything that your partner does that makes you say “ughhh”! It’s disgust, it’s annoying right?

‘Everyone has an ick. You can be in a happy marriage, like I know you are Christine, you must have an ick?’

Presenter Christine Lampard then said: ‘Nothing that would make me go “ughhh” like that, but there would’ve been things before getting married that I would’ve been aware of. Like even simple things like someone that doesn’t laugh with you. 

‘Do you know someone who finds something not funny that you do, that would give me the ick, I’d be like, “Oh, you’re boring”.’

Paul then said: ‘I’ve been married for 20 years, I definitely have an ick with my wife. She puts her cold feet on me when we are in bed. It’s ughhh!’

When asked if you can fix the ick at the start of the relationship, Paul said: ‘This is controversial, I believe you can get out of having the ick. 

‘The reason why many people don’t, is because you’re new in the relationship. So therefore the desire hasn’t built itself up to wanna to work hard enough to get outside of the ick.

‘First you identify, is that a behaviour that if they turned it off, you would be turned on? Next is you communicate it, and the next the third step, the most important is you negotiate a behavioural change. 

Presenter Christine Lampard said that her ick was ‘someone who finds something not funny that you do’ 

‘That’s very important because you want to have the ability to negotiate in a healthy relationship.’

Christine then asked what happens if an ick develops in a longer-term relationship.

‘Ok so this is the problem,’ Paul said. ‘You want to use all those steps I just mentioned, and work uncompromised. But if the ick has moved to a place of disgust and true contempt, then you need to see a professional.

‘Because contempt is the number one reason why divorce happens. It’s that feeling of being superior to your partner.’ 

People on Twitter shared some of their icks, including slurping, making noises while eating and talking whilst eating 

People on Twitter shared some of their icks, with one person saying: ‘Slurpy slurping a cup of tea. Why can’t people just be quiet eating and drinking?’

Another added: ‘Making noises while eating.’

A third commented: ‘I have a list, but top four, talking whilst eating, that funny spit people get in the corner of their mouth while talking, slurping soup/tea and toothpaste adverts, I don’t want to see you brushing your teeth.’

A fourth penned: ‘Agreeing with everyone, not having your own opinion, gushing, silly school girl giggling.’