Four years ago, Ashlee Hayes stumbled onto the online dating profile for Kate Houlihan. There was no picture, but still she was intrigued and sent a message.
The two went out for dinner one night and stayed until the restaurant closed. They have spoken every day since.
This year the Melbourne couple exchanged vows at a beautiful vineyard ceremony, despite the fact that same-sex marriage is still not legal in Australia.
Ashlee Hayes (right) and Kate Houlihan (left) are sharing their love story amid the same-sex marriage postal survey vote
The women, who met four-and-a-half years ago, tied the knot in a beautiful wedding in January at Victoria’s Yarra Valley
When Ashlee, 32, and Kate, 29, first began talking about marriage, they didn’t feel the ‘piece of paper’ making it legal was as important as the event itself
Now Kate and Ashlee are hoping that by sharing their love story amid the postal vote debate, their union will one day soon be accepted by the country they call home.
When Ashlee, 32, and Kate, 29, first began talking about marriage, they didn’t feel that a ‘piece of paper’ making it legal was as important as the event itself.
‘We wanted to commit to each other and also have a celebration and share in that commitment with our friends and family,’ Kate told Daily Mail Australia.
‘We decided we wanted to do it at this point in our lives, we didn’t want to wait until it was legal.’
Kate proposed to Ashlee while the couple were on holiday at Daydream Island in the Whitsundays, taking her on a hike up a hill that overlooked the ocean.
‘I knew I wanted to have that commitment, and thought it would be nice to get in first,’ Kate recalled with a laugh at her decision to pop the question.
It was Ashlee who first messaged Kate on an online dating site four-and-half years ago, despite the fact that her profile was without a picture
The pair went on a dinner date and talked until the restaurant closed. They’ve spoken every single day since, Kate revealed
The couple looked into getting married overseas in a country where same-sex marriage was legal, like New Zealand, but eventually decided against it
The couple looked into getting married overseas in a country where same-sex marriage was legal, like New Zealand, but eventually decided against it.
‘At the end of the day, for us it was a big day to have our family over there and I knew it was important for Ashlee as well.’
‘Even if we got married in New Zealand or somewhere else, it wouldn’t mean much when we got back to Australia.’
‘We decided the most important thing for us was having friends and family around us to celebrate.’
Ashlee and Kate tied the knot during a relaxed bohemian ceremony, nominated for Easy Weddings ‘Wedding of the Year’, among 85 guests at a winery in Victoria’s Yarra Valley on a nice summer day in January.
The bridal party made their own bouquets out of native flowers and wore blush pink dresses.
They decided that the most important thing for them was making the commitment to each other in front of their family
Kate said her favourite memory of the day was dancing with friends on the deck, the hills of the Yarra Valley in the background, and getting to steal time away with Ashlee as they got their wedding photos taken
As the same-sex marriage postal survey continues, Kate feels that it is more important than ever to be accepted and equal to everyone else in the community
‘We wanted the event to be more like a party,’ Kate recalled. ‘Everyone danced all night and no one wanted to go home. My friends still say it was the best wedding they’ve been to.’
‘The whole day was really amazing, it was the best day of our lives.’
Kate said her favourite memory of the day was dancing with friends on the deck, the hills of the Yarra Valley in the background, and getting to steal time away with Ashlee as they got their wedding photos taken.
It wasn’t until after their wedding that Kate said she and Ashlee realised how much being married meant to them.
‘Before we got married, I thought it was just a piece of paper and was more focused on celebrating our commitment together,’ she said.
‘But it’s not just a paper, it’s everything else that comes with having our relationship legally recognised. It would mean that we are equal and accepted from a legal standpoint.’
‘If something happens to one of us one day it means we’re recognised as their wife, and if we decide to start a family to be legally married would be meaningful as well.’
It wasn’t until after they got married that Kate said she and Ashlee realised how much it meant to them
‘We wanted the event to be more like a party,’ Kate recalled. ‘Everyone danced all night and no one wanted to go home. My friends still say it was the best wedding they’ve been to’
And as the same-sex marriage postal survey continues, Kate feels that it is more important than ever to be accepted and equal to everyone else in the community.
Kate and Ashlee received negative comments when their wedding received some online publicity, and have not been blind to the criticism launched by conservative politicians and the ‘No’ campaign in the media.
But Kate said they are trying to take a step away and not let the ‘hurtful’ comments affect them, but rather focus on the positivity that surrounds them.
‘We’re taking comfort in the fact that most of the people we know are really supportive,’ she said. ‘We’re eagerly waiting for it to become legal.’
Kate said she hopes that those who are on the fence or voting ‘No’ in the survey will come to understand that she and Ashlee are just like any other couple.
‘If you get to know us you’ll see that we’ve got just as much love as any straight couple,’ she said.
‘It’s the time now for Australia to make that change and be up there with all the other countries that have legalised same-sex marriage.’
‘We’re no different, we’re just two people in love.