A family is horrified after a memorial dedicated to their late daughter was removed by her school days after being erected.
Year 7 student Charlotte O’Brien took her own life in September after experiencing relentless bullying while attending the Catholic school, Santa Sabina, in the innerwest Sydney suburb Strathfield.
Following the 12-year-old’s tragic death, Charlotte’s heartbroken family set up a memorial on a tree near the school.
Charlotte’s aunt Melinda Rodgers said the family felt it was the only way they could share their farewell to the young girl.
‘It was something we wanted to do for Charlotte because we didn’t get the opportunity to say goodbye,’ she told 9News.
‘It was our special way of giving her something to say, “you mattered” and “we miss you”.’
The memorial was set up on a tree over the weekend, with a small plaque and flowers to pay tribute to Charlotte.
When the family drove past the site the next morning, the memorial had grown in size with other mourners leaving flowers of their own.
The year 7 student tragically died by suicide in September
Charlotte’s grandfather, Bill, pictured at the memorial site
However, later on Monday afternoon, the entire memorial had been removed.
The family first learned of its removal when they discovered Charlotte’s grandfather ‘wandering aimlessly up and down the street… trying to find the memorial site to lay his flowers’.
After he left the flowers at the site of the original memorial, they were ‘devastated’ to learn they had also been removed.
‘Words cannot express how devastated we were,’ Ms Rodger said.
Paulina Skerman, principal at Santa Sabina, said the memorial had been removed in the interests of students.
‘On the advice of mental health experts including Headspace, who are working with the College, we removed the memorial because of the concerns that were raised about the impact this could have on other young people,’ she said.
She explained the school was working ‘with Charlotte’s family to find a permanent and loving way to remember Charlotte’ and promised the 12-year-old would ‘not be forgotten’.
Despite this, Charlotte’s father Mat said he was ‘running out of words’ to describe his feelings about the situation.
‘From the school’s perspective, If I was given advice to remove those things, I wouldn’t have touched them,’ he told 9News, adding it would be a ‘positive step’ for the Santa Sabina to erect a permanent memorial to his daughter.
Earlier this week, Charlotte’s parents slammed the school for ‘sweeping under the carpet’ the issue of bullying – a claim the school vehemently denies.
Mr O’Brien told 2GB host Ben Fordham on Tuesday it took weeks to organise a meeting with the school’s principal Paulina Skerma.
He explained Ms Skerma only reached out to he and his wife after she heard him on Fordham’s breakfast show in the days leading up to Charlotte’s funeral.
A memorial for Charlotte (pictured) outside the school was removed on Monday, further fuelling her parents’ grief
On the night of Charlotte’s funeral, Mr O’Brien emailed the principal and was told she was unable to meet as the school would be closed for a few weeks.
When a meeting was finally set, Mr O’Brien said he and his wife held a ‘glimmer of hope’ that the principal had a chance to think about their daughter’s tragic death and reflect on the hurtful comments she had made to the media.
However, their hope for any positive change was shattered the moment they arrived at the school.
‘That glimmer of hope that anything positive to come from that meeting was squashed the moment we arrived,’ Mr O’Brien said.
‘The gates of the school were closed. We weren’t even met at the school gates. We did not know where to go.’
Mr O’Brien choked back tears as he recalled walking through the school full of children their daughter’s age.
Charlotte’s parents claim the school refused to take accountability for Charlotte’s bullying after their meeting with her former principal, Paulina Skerma (pictured)
‘We had to navigate ourselves across the school grounds, surrounded by other girls in their school uniform, knowing that we will never see our daughter again. That was incredibly hard for us,’ he said.
‘We arrived there and met with the principal. When I shared the feedback, she wasn’t interested in receiving that. The feedback was interrupted. It was discounted. It was disagreed with.
‘I sat across the room from a lady (the principal) that showed myself and the rest of the family no emotion or empathy at all.’
When asked if the principal made any sort of apology for the death of their daughter, Mr O’Brien said ‘there was no accountability at all’.
‘The questions we wanted answered were simply not answered at all. We were left to show ourselves out of the school ground,’ he said.
‘The last image that I will have of that school was as I looked behind me, Kelly was carrying some items of Charlotte’s and watching her squeeze herself and that box through those closed gates was one of the hardest things that I’ve seen.
‘Kelly got in the car and that was the worst I had seen her since the funeral. She said to me “I felt my daughter’s life did not matter”.’
‘I now have to turn my attention to those who want to do better. There are some schools and institutions that are really taking this seriously and are making positive changes,’ Mr O’Brien said.
‘I need to turn my attention to them and encourage them to continue on this journey.
‘…We were able to meet with the senior policy advisory for the NSW government, we were able to meet with Chris Minns himself and his office, we were able to have a conversation with the prime minister of this country on these important topics.
‘All before we were afforded an opportunity to meet with the principal of the school.’
The grieving father described the education system’s response to bullying as ‘an issue across the board’.
‘This is not an isolated issue to one school. It is one of the things that we are advocating for, and that is a review of the anti-bullying policies across schools,’ he said.
‘We need a review of these policies, it needs to be universal and it needs to be one of no tolerance. When it is raised the first time it needs to be dealt with immediately and swiftly.’
Help is available at LIFELINE AUSTRALIA 13 11 14 BEYOND BLUE 1300 22 46 36
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