Six cringeworthy moments from the second season of The Test documentary on Australia’s cricket team

From Justin Langer’s defenestration as Australia’s head coach to the significance of a first Test series in Pakistan in 24 years and discussions about mental health and racism, serious conversations come thick and fast in The Test.

But Amazon’s behind-the-scenes documentary on the Aussie cricket team, which premieres on January 13, also manages to shine a light on the more relaxed aspects of Test cricket.

And it does so often unwillingly, with some of the players revealing themselves as terribly fussy, partial to baffling culinary choices or absurdly meticulous. 

Here Sportsmail takes a look at the documentary’s most awkward moments.

Marnus Labuschagne’s toastie

The best batter in the world according to the International Cricket Council’s rankings, Marnus Labuschagne’s appetite for scoring runs knows no bounds.

And if Episode 1 is anything to go by, his appetite for ham and cheese toasties is just as voracious, with the Aussie star admitting he’s partial to a snack ahead of a day of Test cricket.

Labuschagne’s cooking skills, however, are unlikely to overshadow his batting anytime soon. In the series opener, the 28-year-old is filmed making himself a toastie in the dressing room and reveals the ‘butter is the key to get it crisp on both sides.’

So far, so normal. But things take a sinister turn when Labuschagne nonchalantly proceeds to tell the camera that sticking a piping hot toastie in the fridge is his culinary secret.

‘This is the trick of the trade. Now, not many people do this, but I like a toastie to be cold. So [it goes] in the fridge to get that cheese to harden up.’

Not many people do this indeed, Marnus. And for a very good reason. 

EPISODE 1 –  25:18-25:27

While Labuschagne (left) and Starc are great mates on the field, the pace bowler has to set some boundaries in the changerooms to halt his teammate’s mess from expanding

Mitchell Starc’s boundary

Labuschagne features again prominently at the start of the second episode, with his dressing room etiquette seemingly as questionable as his cheese toastie-making habits.

In the words of Mitchell Starc, Labuschagne is one of ‘the messiest blokes in our group. His mess just expands.’

To prevent said expansion, the Aussie quick carefully puts down tape on the floor to set clear boundaries for the star batter and preventing him from invading his personal space. 

Labuschange, predictably, has none of it: ‘I’m not saying I’m not messy, but I’m not the messiest,’ he replies. 

EPISODE 2 – 2:30-2:36

Shaun Marsh, Steve Smith and Mitch Marsh of Australia celebrate in the changerooms after Australia regained the Ashes in England

The Baggy Green mythology 

Few if any teams even outside the boundaries of cricket place as much importance into an item as Australia’s Test cricket players do with the Baggy Green. 

Steve Waugh, Ricky Ponting and Justin Langer fully embraced the garment and its significance, while the likes of Shane Warne famously preferred the white floppy hat.

The perceived misplaced importance surrounding the Baggy Green has become an easy stick to beat Australian cricket with and The Test lays it on really thick when it comes its inflated mythology. 

‘We don’t feel like we own the Baggy Green,’ declares Mitchell Marsh in the opening episode. 

‘We understand the privilege we have to wear the Baggy Green, to represent our country and to hopefully a few things along the way.’

EPISODE 1 – 29:36 – 29:39, 29:49 – 29:55

Becky Boston and Pat Cummins attend the premiere of The Test Season Two at Hoyts Entertainment Quarter on January 09, 2023 in Sydney

Awkward silence greets Pat Cummins

Anyone who’s ever been in a work meeting know they can be rather awkward affairs, particularly when the floor is open to questions as Pat Cummins discovers early in Episode 3.

As the players convene in their hotel in Rawalpindi, the Aussie skipper looks to gauge his team’s mood in their first meeting following Justin Langer’s acrimonious exit.

‘Since we last got together a few weeks ago, obviously [there’s been] a change of coach,’ Cummins says.

‘I guess more than anything [else, I want to] open up [the floor] if anyone had any questions or thoughts or wanted any clarity around any of that?’

Viewers could be forgiven for thinking they have accidentally switched to an episode of The Office such is the eerie silence that greets his question, with players sheepishly looking around in the hope one of their teammates may answer.

Except that nobody does. ‘Everyone OK?,’ ponders Cummins as he looks around the room nodding to himself. 

We have all been there. 

EPISODE 3 – 8:06-8:25

David Warner and wife Candice watch the men’s singles final match between Rafael Nadal of Spain and Daniil Medvedev of Russia on Rod Laver Arena at the 2022 Australian Open

David Warner’s nascent tennis career

Episode 3 delves into what goes on into ensuring boredom doesn’t set in on tour in Pakistan, with Australia effectively confined to their hotel.

While Mitchell Marsh and Mitchell Starc play Call of Duty, David Warner and Marnus Labuschagne slug it out on the tennis court. 

‘I don’t like to admit it, but unforced errors are beating me,’ Warner tells the camera, as Labuschagne pleads in vain to be given some credit. 

‘As a rookie I’m improving. I’m expecting to get beat 6-0, 6-0 but I’m fighting hard’

Nothing wrong with that, except the footage shows Warner looks anything but a rookie on the court, freely playing the kind of shots plenty of amateur players can only dream of.

Labuschagne, however, is determined to have the final say.  

‘That’s what happens when you don’t score runs,’ he quips. ‘You have to come out and play tennis’

Move over Nick Kyrgios, there’s may be new man in town in Australian tennis. 

EPISODE 3 27:55-28:15, 28:30 – 

Smith has become well known for his fidgeting at the crease, extravagant shots (and leaves) and being downright weird at times – but getting the job done

Steve Smith is ‘a weird person’

From extravagant leaves to his fidgety stance at the crease, Steve Smith’s idiosyncrasies have long been part of cricket folklore. 

But even by his own standards, his meticulousness reaches a whole new level in Episode 4, where the former Aussie captain is shown removing the foam from the thumb pieces in his gloves to soften it in.

Smith is almost aware of how nerdish the whole process sounds as he explains it to a baffled Glenn Maxwell.

‘You are a weird person,’ the all-rounder declares, to which Smith replies: ‘I am, correct.’

EPISODE 4 25:36-25:54