Hey, it’s paw-ty time! Happy Birthday to Me, Happy Birthday to Me! Dilyn the Dog here, the nation’s Numero Uno hound, Downing Street top dog, celebrating being one year old this week.
What can I tell you about my life so far, fans? I was born in Merthyr Tydfil, in a faraway land called Wales; a place where the daffodils are yellow and so is the snow, if I’ve got anything to do with it.
I was rescued from a breeder because I was going to be put down. I don’t even know what that means. Down on the floor, down in my basket?
Downing Street’s dog Dilyn has celebrated turning one this week and looks back on his crazy first year as the country’s top dog
I was adopted by my wonderful humans Boris and Carrie and came to live here in London, in the heart of your government. All of a sudden, I was famous!
Right up there with Scooby Doo, Pluto, Lassie, Snoopy, Mutley, Pongo, Gnasher and Toto — or the Cabinet, as you ethem.
What a crazy 12 months it has been, as I told JAN MOIR…
1: Downing St here I come, September, 2019
Cameras filmed me being carried into No 10 in my very own doggy bag. I wore a matching neckerchief, but I looked a little nervous.
There was good reason. I was a young pup with everything to live for — and I was going to grab this opportunity with two paws.
In September 2019, Dilyn was pictured being carried into No.10 for the very first time in a doggy bag
2: Larry, Chief Mouser
My first shock. Larry the cat and I had to share a home?
Listen motherpuppers, you’ve gotta be kidding me. He was about as friendly as a Liaison Committee — and look at the size of him!
Larry has been here for 13 years through four prime ministers — and, boy, doesn’t he let you know it.
He is always posing around No 10’s front door.
He doesn’t understand that there is a new kid in town. No wonder he doesn’t like me.
The Downing Street cat Larry has been at No.10 for 13 years through four prime ministers and now has to share a home with Dilyn
3: Campaigning for Goldsmith
Don’t I look smart in my true blue lead? We were campaigning for an MP called Zac Goldsmith, who went right ahead and lost his seat.
What a waste of my time! I’ll never get those doggy years back.
Zac may have failed with the electorate, but to cheer him up he was given a life peerage and a fancy title as Minister for the Pacific, Trees, Weather, Clouds, International Snowballs and Group Tiddlywinks.
Dilyn became involved in the politic world when he joined Carrie Symonds out campaigning for Zac Goldsmith, who lost his Richmond Park seat in the election
I’m new to the game, but sometimes I feel I will never understand politics.
Zac is a Minister for Animal Welfare, too. So maybe he could sling some chews my way, for a start? After everything I’ve done for him…
4: Antlers and tinsel at Christmas, December, 2019
Loving the Christmas tinsel collar, but I am not sure about these reindeer antlers.
Is it beneath my dognity as a proud Jack Russell to be dressed like this?
Or should I just go with the festive flow and not mind looking like a dog’s breakfast?
Why don’t we hold a rufferendum on the subject …
Dilyn celebrated his first Christmas at Downing Street with new owners Boris and Carrie by wearing a stylish tinsel necklace
Carrie Symonds shared a photo of her dog dressed up at Christmas on social media, writing ‘I’m sorry Dilyn. I am a bad mother’ alongside the hilarious photo
5: Smart Union Jack Coat, February 1, 2020
Brexit is here at last and I’m in a Union Jack coat to celebrate. It gives me a statesmanlike air, don’t you think?
Like my master Boris, I am developing a taste for power, the cut and thrust of political life. It is intoxicating! Don’t call me, I’ll woof you.
I’ll get my people to sniff your people. Let’s all dig a big hole, then jump in. Dominic, you can stop digging now!
Which reminds me. Mr Cummings was sitting in the garden while lots of people asked him questions. Weird or what?
My opinion was also solicited by Laura Kuenssberg.
She rubbed my tummy — so I told her everything.
Brexit arrived on February 1, 2020 and a photograph of Dilyn wearing in a Union Jack coat to celebrate was shared on the dog’s Instagram
6: True love with Bailey Javid, Valentine’s day, 2020
I have fallen in love with Bailey, the doggo to the Treasury who lives next door with Sajid Javid’s family.
She is blonde, gorgeous and, most importantly, she is not too fussy. In the garden every morning, we romp together in bliss.
For I am just a boy, standing in front of a cavapoo, asking her to roll in the squirrel poop with me. And she does!
We dream of dating, of meeting incognito in a local pub, where I will say: ‘Make mine a double and give one to the bitch at the end of the bar.’
Dilyn spent Valentine’s Day 2020 with Bailey Javid, the dog to the Treasury. But Dilyn was heartbroken when his best friend disappeared from next door
But something terrible has happened. One day Bailey was there, the next she was a gone girl. I lost my mind, I lost all my dognity, I went mad with grief. Was it something I woofed?
No. Mr Javid left in a hurry after something the humans call an ‘unhelpful political row’.
‘Don’t you worry, Dilyn,’ Boris said. ‘There are plenty more blondes in the park.’
Well, I guess he would know!
7: The reshuffle that never was, March 12, 2020
I nearly choke on my breakfast. I am as sick as a dog. A so-called newspaper has reported that Boris and Carrie have ‘grown weary’ of me and that I might not make it through the next domestic reshuffle.
They say that our home is full of ‘dog s**t’ and that I am more of a pest than a pet. WHAT?
I blink back tears. Yes, I admit there has been the occasional whoopsie.
But nothing compared to the mess Mr Hammond used to make over at the Ministry of Defence. Or Mr Hancock is currently doing in sickness and in Health.
A newspaper reported that Boris and Carrie have ‘grown weary’ of Dilyn and that he might not make it through the next domestic reshuffle – but luckily he made it out the other side
Larry the cat thinks my apparent demise is hilarious but, lucky for me, Carrie agrees with my version of events. ‘Hush, puppy,’ she says, and gives me a kiss. Then she puts out a statement.
‘There has never been a happier, healthier and more loved dog than our Dilyn,’ she thunders. Woof! I adore that girl.
8: Carrie and I isolate together, March 27, 2020
Pregnant Carrie and I are worried about Boris, who is lying in his hospital sickbed. She is missing her human partner but she is not alone in isolation — she has me.
I am trying to be here for her, to be a comfort and a good boy.
‘There were times that were very dark indeed. My heart goes out to all those in similar situations, worried sick about their loved ones,’ she tweeted.
Boris Johnson was in hospital amid the coronavirus pandemic but Dilyn stayed home to self-isolate with Carrie Symonds
When Boris was on the mend, she thanked the NHS and the staff at St Thomas’ Hospital. ‘I will never stop thanking you,’ she said.
Anydog else she wants to thank? I think we all know who.
9: Enter baby Wilfred, May 3, 2020
Ahem. I did not sign up for this. A baby was not in my social contract. Who thought this was a good idea?
One minute Carrie is all #adoptdontshop and #adogisfor life, rubbing my tummy and asking if I am a good boy, a lovely boy, the best boy in the world.
The next she is popping out another Johnson — like the world needs more of them!
Baby Wilfred Lawrie Nicholas Johnson was welcomed to the family on April 29 at 9am, named after both Boris and Carrie’s grandfathers
And then — this is the worst bit — bringing him home to live with us. However, Wilfred is cute, he smells nice and he makes funny noises.
Sometimes there is bawling all night long, but apparently that is not the baby, it’s Mr Sunak looking at the economic forecasts.
10: Jogging with Boris, May 25, 2020
Just exactly who is the rescue animal here? My master Boris is still struggling to get back to full fitness, but everyone can see the efforts he is making.
And who is right by his side? Not Larry the cat but me, Dilyn the Dog, his right hound man.
We’re going to stick this out together, come what may, one paw after the other, on the long walkies of life. Woof!
Most recently, Dilyn the famous dog was pictured out with Boris Johnson during their daily exercise lockdown routine